Innocent Love
by AnnabethReads
Summary: Tobias and Tris are happy, there is no war and they plan on being together for as long a possible. However, when Tris becomes pregnant a feud of unexpected behaviour erupts between the two and now they even question a future together. What will they make of this kid? (Summary sucks, story rocks though)
1. Chapter 1- Music to My Ears

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing. All rights to Veronica Roth.**

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Chapter 1

I wouldn't say it was exact enlightenment when I saw the results. Sure, I always considered having kids, eventually, one day… maybe when I was 30 or something. I also knew that it would be with Tobias' kid, that was a no brainer. But no, here I sit on a white porcelain toilet, 18 years old and holding a pregnancy test guaranteeing that I now hold Tobias' kid. Okay sure, I'm not at an ideal age but I basically can check off my other hopes if I ever had children. Maybe that's why I have a smile working onto my face; it may also explain why I have a desperate need to tell Tobias despite me leaving initiation training early for my sake of taking this test.  
Wait, I can't tell him now. Not with all those other initiates training, I guess I'll tell him tonight in our apartment. Okay, that what I'll do, now back to training those kids.  
When I re-enter the training center Tobias has all the initiates surrounding the mat as 2 of them brawl in the middle. I hardly remember most of their names but I think I almost got it. There were 18 this year, 10 Dauntless born (Jason, Nina, Paul, Olivia, Edward, Jeon, Sandra, Rachel, Ariel, Patrick) the other 8 from different factions (Raleigh, William, Roxy, George, Paulina, Jackson, Danny, Jamie). Shauna and Zeke train the 10 separately leaving Tobias and I with the other 8, which is fine by me, they're all pretty good people anyway.  
I look over to the fighting board and my mind goes into hyper drive as it matches faces to names and the chances of one person beating the other.

Round 1:  
Raleigh- Candor, blonde hair, grey eyes, male. Well built but poor speed.  
William- Amity, jet black hair, pale green eyes, male. Scrawny but quick.

Rounds 2:  
Roxy- Erudite, brown hair, brown eyes, female. Tall and frankly rather scary looking.  
George- Candor, brown hair, green eyes, male. Great tactic, VERY bad timing.

Round 3:  
Paulina- Amity, red hair, green eyes, female. Very sweet looking until you piss her off (Raleigh learned that one the hard way).  
Jackson- Candor, black hair with streaks of dark red, sea green eyes, male. Charming but not very good at keeping his mouth shut.

Round 4:  
Danny- Abnegation, blonde hair, brown/yellow eyes, female. Strong, and quick but very small.  
Jamie- Amity, black hair, grey eyes, female. Very gothic look going on with this chick.

My bets are set on William, Roxy, Paulina, and Danny. I have high hopes for these girls, the boys… not so much.  
"How are things going?" I ask Tobias while sliding right next to him and crossing my arms over my chest like him.  
"Pretty good, William seems to be using the tactic of tiring out your opponent and then attacking." Tobias and I both laugh but soon cringe when Raleigh body slams William with a loud SMACK! "Well that didn't seem to help." Tobias mumbles and I hit his arm.  
"Hey, give him a minute. William is fast and he has a strong stamina, he'll win."  
"Is that a bet Prior?" Tobias turns to me, his cute grin and arched eyebrow making me blush.  
"Loser has to give the winner whatever they want." I say, extending 'whatever' to show its significance. "You're on." Tobias sticks his hand out to me and I shake it, smiling with the pride and knowledge that I have practically won me a bet within a matter of minutes. The fight goes on a little longer, William still bounding around and Raleigh losing complete momentum and motivation. A finally blow to Raleigh's jaw sent him sprawling on the mat unconscious. Tobias scowls at me angrily before looking back to the boys.  
"Round one winner, William!" Tobias announces while scratching off Raleigh's name from the board.  
"I win, I win, I win, I win!" I tease in a whisper so none of the initiates hear. "Get him off the mat." I finally demand William and he drags off Raleigh's limp body until blood only remains on the mat.  
"Okay, up next… Roxy and George."  
The two meet in the middle and instantly attack; grunts and screams echoing off everything while both severely damage one another's faces.  
"We both know who is likely to win." I say close to Tobias's ear.  
"Roxy." We both say in unison and as though it were meant to be, Roxy knocks the wind out of George and Tobias announces her win.  
Fight three goes on for a good five minutes before Paulina smacks the cocky smile from Jackson and sends him unconscious, the entire time we all stared in absolute fear. Tobias calls for the last fight and we both know how this could end. Jamie is big, Danny is even smaller than I was, and this is basically a Tris, Peter fight all over again.  
"Wow great idea sticking the giant with the shrimp." I snap at Tobias in a whisper and he smirks.  
"Common, this is perfect timing for her to show off her skills and if Danny is smart enough she may just play dead before Jamie can damage her." Tobias laughs and I roll my eyes.  
"Idiot." I mumble and with that I watch a possible death unravel.  
Danny dodges the first, second, and third attack but she took a pretty winded fourth attack without a second thought. Jamie straddled her and threw back and forth punches across Danny's face, blood splattering in all directions. This was even worse than I thought. Danny flails beneath Jamie and soon is giving a moment of relief before Jamie yanks Danny by her arm and a loud pop and snap echo in the room. Next a scream and heavy sobbing. I've been an initiate trainer for a little more than a year and with all three I haven't seen a fight like this. Even Tobias is panicking next to me.  
"ALRIGHT THAT'S ENOUGH!" I demand and Jamie stops, kicking Danny one last time and walking to the side. "Everyone go to lunch, Tobias help me get her to Chris." He doesn't hesitate; together we walk through he compound, Danny heavily gasping for air as Tobias holds her. We make it to the infirmary and I ask the receptionist whom I know as Laura despite her name being Lauren, working at her desk.  
"LAURA CHRIS' UNIT! IS SHE BUSY!?" I demand and Laura shakes her head, shocked to see the girl bleeding in Tobias' arms.  
"CHRISTINA!" I cry out as I enter her unit and watch her emerge quickly from behind a curtain.  
"Dear lord what happened?" She demanded, rushing over to us.  
"Fights, a bigger initiate chose to take out ALL of her anger today."  
"Wow you guys are really great instructors!" Chris says sarcastically and I roll my eyes.  
"Please, just help her." I finally say and Chris nods, leading us behind another curtain.  
We leave Danny in her hands and as soon as all of this adrenaline leaves my system my mind fills with the revolting images of that fight. Blood, vomit, and now I'm sure to be sick. I glance at Tobias and look at his blood soaked shirt and instantly run for a bathroom. He is quick behind me and pulls back my hair.  
"Do I even have to ask for the test?" He asked with a chuckle.  
"Not really." I say as I slip the test from my black jacket and hand it to him. I rinse my mouth as he gawks at the test.  
"I'm… this… we… a baby… in you?!" He stutters and I nod.  
"Yes Tobias, you are going to be a dad, this is all real, we are going to have a baby and it is now inside of me." I say summing up what his splutter question probably was asking.  
"Tris, this is…" His face looks strange, I've never seen him look like that before, now my stomach drops and I feel ready to cry. It never occurred to me that Tobias may not want this baby or wants to stay with me because I'm pregnant. "This is the greatest news anyone has ever told me."

Music to my ears.

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	2. Chapter 2- Admiring My Sleeping Angel

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing. All rights to Veronica Roth**

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Chapter 2

Okay so maybe in the spur of the moment I didn't mind the fact I was having a child but now, at 5am while Tobias is already out and setting up for the next day of initiation, I'm here crying in our apartment at the thought of being an 18-year-old mom. I would call Tobias to come back but that would be distracting him and I don't want to do that. Who else would be up at this time? Probably Will but that would be because of work. Uriah always sleeps in so that's out of the question. Christina, she's awake at this time!  
I fumble to grab my phone, my need from wanting comfort from someone nearly causing me to sob. As I wait for her to answer I instantly become self-aware about my nail-biting, which only happens when I'm nervous.  
"Hello?" Christina's voice sounds sleepy but something tells me she has chugged coffee for an hour.  
"Chris. It's me Tris."  
"Tris? Why are you calling me at 5am? You only start work at 7 or something like that. Are you crying?" Her voice sympathizes me and my tears fall faster.  
"Can you come over for a few minutes? I know you have work but, I re-really need to talk to a friend at the moment and I would call Tobias but I don't want to take him away from the initiates"  
"Yeah, yeah. I'm coming over it's okay Tris. I'll be there in 5 minutes."  
"Thank you."

Christina's POV

"Hey Lauren, can you take my shift for an hour or so. I have to go help a friend with something."  
"Alright, go ahead. But you owe me later."  
"My slice of cake sound good to you?" I ask.  
"You got yourself a deal." She smiles to me and I run out of my unit, my black doctors coat expanding behind me.  
Tris never cries, okay no she does but not like that. She sounded scared but not of someone hurting her. My feet carry me faster and I dodge the very few people who roam the hallways at this time. When I make it to Tris and Four's apartment I saunter in. Between our large group of friends we tend to be comfortable walking into one another's houses, announcing our entry but still we're not to shy with each other.  
"TRIS!" I call. No answer, where is she? "TRIS?" I call again, pushing into her bedroom and instantly smelling bile. I hurry over to the washroom and push open the door. Tris was sprawled by the toilet, which was filled with vomit.  
Her chest rose weakly and her body trembled.  
"Tris…" I choke out as my body moves forward and falls by her side. I move her head from its side and push back some of her blonde hair. "Tris you have to wake up, come on!" I demand, tapping her cheek and shaking her body. When she doesn't I quickly run for her phone and call Four.  
"FOUR!" I cry out into the speaker. "It's me Chris. Come quick! Tris passed out and I can't carry her all the way back to my unit!"  
"What's going on?! Why did Tris pass out!?" He shouts into the phone, his voice crumbling with fear.  
"I don't know, she called saying she needed to talk to me, I came here and she was passed out by the toilet."  
"No, make her wake up. Do everything you can! I'll be there quickly."  
When he hangs up I go straight into doctor mode. I touch her forehead and instantly feel the burn I receive from it. Her temperature has to be at least over 103. She's pale, there's puke in the toilet and her hands are clammy. This has to be a virus or the flu. She must be dehydrated if she is passed out and if she isn't given fluids soon she could go into a healing coma. Come on Four hurry.

Tobias' POV

I was just about to go and wake the initiates when my phone buzzed in my pocket. Christina desperately called for me about Tris and now I'm sprinting through the halls, past all the people who stare at me angrily, and bounding up the stairs to the apartments.  
I burst through the apartment and my eyes jump from the surroundings. I run to the bathroom and find Christina wiping Tris' face with a wet cloth.  
"Tris, sweetie." I fall to my knees and cradle her head. Her face his heated, and hangs limply between my palms.  
"Four, carry her to my unit. She needs fluids she's probably dehydrated. Come on."  
I do as commanded and carry Tris bridal style. Christina and I run to her unit where a group of doctors take her on a bed and rush her away from me.  
"Christina I want to go with her." I demand while she holds me back.  
"No Four, you have to let us take care of her. Go train the initiates and come back at lunch, she'll be here I promise." I look from Christina to the doors that just shut as my mind races with thoughts about my Tris. I can't leave her, not without knowing if she's okay. "Four, there's nothing you can do now. Just go to work, I promise to call and update you on how she is okay?" I nod and swallow the lump in my throat.  
"Okay."

~.~.~

"Alright initiates, Six isn't here so don't ask why!" I snap and everyone stares at me with glares of confusion. "Today you will be doing your final day of fights, after lunch we'll be starting gun work! Here re the fights today." I flip the black board and show who is going against who.

Round 1: Raleigh and George  
Round 2: Jackson and Danny  
Round 3: William and Roxy  
Round 4: Paulina and Jamie

"Yesterday there was free combat, doing what you thought was right. Today you must take what you learned and actually do the proper forms of attacks and hits. If I see anything that looks like a weak attempt to win a fight then we are going to have a few problems. I'm I understood?"  
"Yes Sir!" Everyone says in unison while fixing their posture from my unnerving glare.  
"Now let's get to the fighting."

I hardly can keep track of these fights, my mind just holds onto what is happening to Tris now. My leg taps in anticipation for the phone in my pocket to ring.  
When Raleigh elbows the back of George making him crumble to the floor I scratch out George's name and announce the victory of Raleigh.  
"Round 2." I say carelessly. Jackson and a battered Danny circle the mat, watching one another for any movements and to me it looks like a boring stare down. "Start fighting now!" I say angrily and they instantly charge at one another.  
As soon as punches are thrown my phone buzzes and I fumble to grab it.  
"Hello?" I say frantically.  
"Four, it's me Chris. Tris is awake. She's sorta groggy, not really sure what's going on but she's awake none the less."  
"Oh thank god!" I sigh while sitting on the table I stood by and watching the fight end with a triumphed victory of Jackson. I cover the speaker of my phone with my hand and call out the win and for round 3 to start. I cross off Danny's name and put the phone back to my ear.  
"Can I see her?" I ask with anticipation.  
"She needs to sleep for a little while, regain her senses and then you can come over. Like I said by lunch time she should be fine."  
"Thanks Chris. Tell her I say hi and that I love her."  
"Will do. Bye Four." We hang up and I look to the fight. The clock on the wall says 10:30. This fight and the last one and then I can do a few more things before releasing them for an early lunch.  
It takes 15 minutes for this fight to end with a victory; Roxy looms over the passed out body of William with a triumphed smile.  
"Winner of round 3, Roxy! Okay round 4!" I demand and Roxy drags away William. I scratch off William's name and watch round 4 unravel. It's slow at the start, dragging on for 10 minutes with barely any damage being done. Then the real brawl starts and all hell breaks loose. Paulina and Jamie fight for 20 minutes until Jamie gets a good kick to Paulina's side and send her sprawling to the ground. Paulina tries to stand but gives up instantly.  
"Round 4 winner, Jamie!" I scratch off Paulina's name and look to the clock. 11:15, good maybe I can put these weaklings through a running test. "Okay initiates let's do a mile race. Whoever throws up first loses, fastest time wins. To make a mile you must do 20 laps around the edge of the room. Do not cut the tapped off corners otherwise you lose. Let's get started." Everyone gives an anguished look but soon go to the side of the room and line up. "Okay, GO!" I demand and they all run. If their speed was fast they should get 1 lap done in 45 seconds. Slower people might take longer than a minute but I'm mainly looking for the person who vomits first.  
About 14 laps in Danny collapses to the side and gags loudly. She doesn't puke but she gasps and claws at her stomach. She gets to her feet eventually and runs again with everyone. As they make it through lap 20 I take down their times.

Jamie- 12 minutes 33 seconds  
Roxy- 14 minutes 21 seconds  
Raleigh- 14 minutes 46 seconds  
William- 14 minutes 55 seconds  
Pauline- 15 minutes 37 seconds  
Jackson- 16 minutes  
Danny- 17 minutes 47 seconds  
George- 18 minutes 22 seconds

"Lunch time. Everyone's free to go, be back here in 2 hours." With that I run out of the room and down the many hallways all the way to the infirmary. I run to Chris' unit and go straight towards the receptionist.  
"Hey Lauren, where's Tris?" I ask her and she looks up from her computer.  
"She's behind curtain 8, I think she's still asleep though. You're free to go in if you want." I smile and thank her before jogging to curtain 8 and peaking into it. When I do the peaceful face of my girlfriend sleeping brings tears to my eyes. I sit next to her on a chair and kiss her hand.  
"I love you beautiful." I say softly, a smile working onto my lips as I admire her as she sleeps.


	3. Chapter 3- They're Fine, I Promise

**DISCLAIMER: I don't own anything. All rights to Veronica Roth. **

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Chapter 3

When Tris begins to stir it's nearly time for me to return to the initiates. I hold her hand a little tighter and look to her eyes, which open slowly and squint against the light. Christina comes in and dims the brightness so Tris can open her eyes entirely.  
"Hey beautiful." I say with a smile that she returns weakly.  
"I'm far from beautiful." She says in a croak.  
"To me you are." I saw back and she blushes lightly.  
"Alright Tris, the good news is you're temperature dropped to 102." Christina says turning away from Tris' monitors.  
"102?" I exclaim. "How is that any better?"  
"Well considering how she went from 104 to 102 there is a great difference." Christina smiles at me with her 'you're an idiot' smile before turning to Tris again.  
"How you feeling Tris?" She asks with a concerned stare.  
"Alright. My head hurts and everything is sort of foggy. I remember I went to throw up and then I just passed out." Tris looks to me with her eyes wild as though remembering something. She looks down to her stomach and then back to me.  
It then hits me. Tris is pregnant! What if the baby got hurt? Does Chris even know?  
"You're worried about the baby?" Christina asks as she sits by Tris' feet.  
"How did you know?" Tris asks as we both look at Christina with bewilderment.  
"Guys when someone of our age and older passes out we have to do tests of all sorts for any possible reasons why. It was obviously the flu and dehydration but we ran the tests and I found out you were pregnant. 5 weeks to be exact. The babies are fine, in fact you're lucky to still have both of them."  
"I'm sorry did you say both?" I ask with wide eyes. Christina's smile grows even larger and she nods.  
"You guys are having twins!" She announces and I feel ready to pass out. Tris has the same expression as we both look to each other.  
Twins? How? One kid seems like enough, but two? How on earth are we going to raise these kids to be… I don't know… normal! We're going to screw up, oh shit, not twins, anything but TWINS!  
"Tobias?" Tris asks me, her eyes grabbing mine and trying to beg me to keep her from being scared. She's scared too it's obvious. She's only 18, I'm 20, and we're not cut out to be parents. Then I look to her stomach, in there my babies are growing. In there I have my future and I can only imagine how beautiful my babies will me looking like their mommy or like me or like to two of us put together.  
I nod, my smile growing like Christina's and my eyes brightening with Tris looking into them.  
"We can do it." I reassure Tris as I stroke back her blonde hair. "Together, even if it gets hard." I say making her giggle. She nods in agreement and squeezes my hand.  
"You'll stay with me?" She asks and I nod with furrowed eyebrows.  
"Of course I will. I'll always stay with you and the twins." I kiss her forehead.  
"I think you have to get going, the initiates need to be trained." Christina chimes in and I look to the clock. It's almost 2; I'm 30 minutes late.  
"Yeah. Take care of her for me okay?" I ask Christina, my hand still holding Tris' as I stand up.  
"Most definitely. Now don't go killing those kids. I heard several of them freaking out about you today." I nod and kiss Tris' hand once more.  
"Get better Six, I need my other half to make me feel like a ten again."  
"I will." And with that I let go of her hand and return to work.

|Next Day|

"Today you will be knife throwing. This is not a joke and is possibly harder then shooting a gun. For most of you it will come naturally, for others it will take years of perfecting your throw to hit the target."  
"How were you the first time?" George speaks up and I saunter up to him.  
"Well George, how does that apply to my knife throwing skills right at this moment?"  
"Wel-well it doesn't I guess." He stammers uncomfortably.  
"That's right, it doesn't. If I can hit a target now I won't be thinking back to 4 years ago when I threw my first knife!" I demand. "Now everyone grab a belt and let's get to work." I command and they all go to the table, strapping on a belt full of knives. When they return I stand feet from a target, pull out a knife and then throw it. It was so quick and the bang was loud making most of the initiates cower. "That is what I want to see. Now lets get to practice. They all take a station and begin to do the technique I taught yesterday before the session ended. Most of them use the technique of invisible knives, which I do in honor of Tris who claimed it really does work. Others go straight into holding and throwing the sharp blades.  
Mentally I take notes on who seems stronger at knife throwing then the others, but I'm soon disturbed when the back door opens with a loud creak. Everyone turns to look and I scream, "DID I TELL YOU TO STOP!" They all get back to throwing and I nod in approval. When I look back to the person I see Tris walking in, my face angers and I run to her.  
"Tris why are you here?!" I demand while taking her side gently. "You should be at home resting, not here training these weaklings."  
"Tobias, I'm fine." She says with a small laugh. "Please, the apartment got boring without you and I felt capable of training these guys today. I promise if I don't feel good I'll go back but as of right now please let me stay!" Her eyes beg as the light blue pierce me with sadness. I sigh and shake my head but continue to hold her sad eyes.  
"Fine." I moan after a moment of her sad eyes. "How are they?" I ask quickly, my hand dropping to her stomach but looking casual enough so the initiates won't notice.  
"They're fine, I promise not to allow anything to happen to our babies. Now knife work, how's that going?" She smirks, pushing past me and eyeing the initiates.  
"It isn't pretty. They almost seem to be taking these knives as jokes."  
"Should we change that?" She asks turning back to me.  
"I promise not to take another part of your ear this time." I say making Tris laugh.  
"You do and I'll kill you." She threatens. "But any of these guys think they can stand where I do, maybe show them how the knife can do damage."  
"Got it. ALRIGHT WEAKLINGS LISTEN UP!" All the knives stop being thrown, the last ones flying either hitting the board and sticking or clambering to the floor. "By analysis some of you seem to be a little to comfortable with these knives. Now this just doesn't seem too dauntless at all. You need to fear these weapons, be comfortable in the fact that you can use them but remember, these inflict pain, these can end your lives with a single swipe. Six has joined us so she will be my demonstration. Six." I motion for her to stand at the target. She confidently walks up to the target and stands in front of it, her small stature making a small un-noticeable smile work onto my face at the sight of her barley reaching the center of the target.  
I take a knife and hold it tightly. My eyes close as I breathe in and then fly open when I breathe out and chuck the knife in Tris' direction. It sticks next to her left arm, just centimeters from her black sleeve. She doesn't even flinch, not a single blink of fear.  
I chuck the next knife and it sticks next to her right ear, right where I nicked off the small part two years ago. I take my last knife and throw it so fast it shocks most of the initiates. The knife flies and sticks just above Tris' head.  
"Big deal, you have an accurate aim, never would you actually hit her." George speaks, I swear the mouth of that kid. I might as well throw my knife at it. While Tris yanks out all of the knives and picks up the dropped ones I stand face to face with George.  
"Should we test that with you as my target then?" I ask him in a snide tone.  
"Go ahead."

Tris' POV

Tobias looms over that kid George, a familiar anger stuck on his face as he and George go back and forth. I grab the last of the knives and place them on the table, not even bothering to listen to Tobias threaten George. Apparently one of the initiates agrees because she leaves the group and comes to me.  
"Hey Six?" Jamie comes up to me her spiky black hairy swinging in its ponytail. I only realized now how she is my height and seems rather nice as a person. Her eyes are the same icy blue as mine and she has small perky ears.  
"What is it?" I ask her, trying to keep my height as leader.  
"What happened yesterday?" She asked me and I stare daggers at her.  
"What's it to you?!" I snap.  
"Nothing, I just saw Four and some other girl running with someone who looked like you in Four's arms. I was just worried about you." She furrows her eyebrows and turns but I stop her.  
"I'm sorry for being harsh. Yes that was me and yes, I'm fine." I say with my eyes shut as I try to release my authority voice and sound like a normal person. Jamie turns around with a small smile and glint of success in her eyes.  
"You sure you can train us today? I mean I don't doubt you I just know that if Four is resistant to letting you stay and placed a hand on your stomach there is more then meets the eye."  
"Jamie listen, you can't say anything to anyone about it. I don't care what you heard or saw you have to keep shut okay?"  
"Got it, just promise me that if I make it through initiation you'll show me the baby when it's born." She smiles at me knowingly and I smile back before Tobias and everyone else walks over.  
"JAMIE!" Tobias snaps. She turns to him and I cut in.  
"She slipped a knife on her hand, I'm sending her to get it checked out." I came up with that when I noticed Jamie still had her hands behind her back. She grabs a knife and slips it on her hand, not even cringing from the gash she just embedded into the back of it.  
"Yeah, I guess I wasn't paying attention." She says while bringing her hand around and showing the gash to Tobias. He stares a little lighter and nods.  
"Go get that looked at, come back after lunch though." Jamie nods and runs out.  
George goes to where I stood, his head actually going past the target. I circle around the table and stand next to Tobias, he leans close to my head and in quite whispers asks, "Where should I get him?"  
"Don't do to much damage, maybe skim his arm, not stitches worthy but enough to make a cut."  
"Got it." And then the knives get thrown. One sticking by George's ear, the next by his thigh and the last one just running over his arm and smacking the board to his right.  
"YOU HIT ME!" George screamed out, pointing an accusing finger at Tobias.  
"I didn't hit you," Tobias says calmly, wiping one of his blades with the hem of his black shirt. "You moved. When you get cocky about what you _think _you know you will become comfortable, do something wrong, in this case flinch, and inflict the pain someone else was trying to bring to you." George is dumb ford, his finger collapsing to his side and then head looking down to evaluate his small cut. "You should thank me, I could have thrown the knife closer to your arm thinking you'd stay still but I didn't take that risk. My decision could have prevented the knife in that wall," Tobias pointed to the knife sticking by George's arm. "From jutting out of your forearm right at this moment."  
"Yeah well thanks for nothing." George says, walking away from the target and towards a stack of clean sweat towels. He cleans the blood that is falling quickly from his arm and joins the group behind Tobias and I.  
"Well I guess you are all free for Lunch, be back her in 2 hours." Tobias declares and everyone leaves the room, their shoulders dropping from all their held up fear.  
As soon as the door shuts Tobias turns to me dropping the knife he held on the table and placing his large palm on my stomach.  
"They're fine, I promise." I say with a small smile.  
"Good." Tobias smiles, leaning forward and placing his warm, pink lips on mine.

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**Comment if you're liking it. Suggest anything you think could work for the story. Heck rant about it for all I care, I just want to know what you think of my writing :) **

**-Valentina **


	4. Chapter 4- Aim for the Groin

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing. All rights to Veronica Roth.**

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Chapter 4

You could say I felt better after my break down yesterday but the truth was my fear of being a young mom still haunted me. I'm thinking into the future, wondering how I would react if my kids got tattoos when they are only 15, would I even let them get tattoos? Would they be covered in piercings? What if I screw up? Screw the future, how will giving birth to them be like? I know Tobias won't be in the room, despite being in dauntless I hold strongly to the abnegation way of having a baby. The men would stay outside of the room while the doctor delivered the baby. It shows modesty and gives no selfish reasons for the woman to get comfort from her husband. After Tobias left me in the infirmary yesterday I talked to Chris and asked her if she would be able to deliver my baby but it turns out that's not her medical league. She can only deal with my development through the pregnancy but when the time comes she has to let another doctor do it. I told her about Abnegations ways and instead of calling me a 'classic stiff' she said that she would be with me during the birth, no questions asked. I'm lucky to have her as a best friend.  
"Hey Tris." Christina and Will approach, a tray at hand with their other ones intertwined.  
"Hi guys." I smile, watching them sit next to me.  
"Where's Four?" Will asks me and I point to the line up.  
"Getting him and I food."  
"So Tris, how do you feel after yesterday?" Christina asks, Will nodding along making it obvious that Christina told him EVERYTHING!  
"I'm fine, I trained the initiates with Tobias today."  
"No." Christina butts in. "Tris you shouldn't be doing that! What if you pass out again? You got lucky once but I don't know how the," She looks around and whispers "twins" then she speaks normally again, "Would react. You could lose on of them and believe me, you seem in no shape to deal with the lose of a you know what."  
"What can I do then?!" I demand angrily. "If it's not you it's Tobias telling me what to do and how I need to keep myself rested! It's been 5 weeks! That's it, what's going to happen in 8 months from now, huh? Am I going to be trapped doing nothing because it's a _risk!_" I put quotation marks around the word 'risk' and roll my eyes. "I don't want this! I don't want any of this!" Tears begin to well up in my eyes and as soon as Tobias sets down our trays of food I'm over the bench and running out of the cafeteria.  
"TRIS!" Christina cries, Tobias soon doing the same as they both chase me. I sob and shake and my knees begin to tremble. I make it to the chasm where I grab the handrail and crouch down, one hand above my head, the other covering my mouth as I try to stop sobbing.  
"Tris. Sweetie, tell me what's wrong." Tobias crouches to my side out of breath but stronger then I'll ever be. His hand rubs my back and I turn to him, my face falling onto his shoulder. He sits down and cradles me, whispering words of comfort that I could hardly make out but somehow making me less scared. Chris is soon crouching by Tobias, her hand rubbing my arm.  
"I can't do this!" I finally sob to Tobias and he instantly says a calm no.  
"You are ready for this, I know it." He encourages.  
"What if the kids get screwed up? What if they hate me? Tobias I don't even know if I love them." I admit, my body racking in his arms.  
"Tris, you do love them." Tobias says firmly. "We love our babies. Each of us is part of them and they are apart of us."  
"No, I don't want them." I say angrily, thrashing slightly but only to have Tobias tighten his grip on me.  
"Tris stop!" He demands. I do and he takes my hand, placing it on my hard stomach. "They are in here, the twins are growing and we have to accept it." He says. "I love them, I love you. We are a family now, you have to accept it."  
"I'm so scared." I whisper and Tobias nods, his own tears falling now.  
"Me too. I don't even think I can be called Four because this feels like my fifth fear. I'm just as worried about this as you are but as long as you and I are together, I'm ready."  
"Okay."

~.~.~

Uriah sat at the table during dinner, his arms crosses as he eyed the paintball guns on Tobias, Zeke, Shauna, and my backs.  
It's still not fair that you guys get to have all the fun, I want to play capture the flag too!" He whines making Marlene roll her eyes.  
"Uriah, this is not just a game, this is an up close and personal mission to destroy another team while working together and proving leadership skills." Zeke says.  
"Hey it's a game where people get shot with paint balls and tackle one another like there's no tomorrow. I want in."  
"Sorry buddy, initiates and trainers only." Tobias says, pulling me closer to his side. I nuzzle my head into his neck and breathe his scent.  
"You guys suck so bad." Uriah complains, going back to his pouting. Tobias looks to him and then sighs heavily.  
"Fine. Take my gun, have fun attacking the initiates." Tobias hands the paintball gun to Uriah who is as happy as a kid on Christmas morning. As he stood up Marlene took his arm.  
"I swear to God, you hit anyone of us and I will personally murder you in your sleep." She says in a growl causing Uriah to cower slightly.  
"Yes ma'am." He nods vigorously making Marlene smile.  
"Good, have fun." She says, releasing his arm and allowing him to run free.  
"EAT MY PAINT INITIATES!" Uriah shouts as he runs through the dinning hall and shoots the colorful pistols at the angry initiates. Cries of encouragement came from older dauntless members while cries of complaints and dismay of Uriah's childlessness came from the initiates.  
"He's an idiot." Shauna laughs, scooping more chicken pot pie into her mouth.  
"I wonder what it would be like to get shot in the groin?" I say making everyone look to me with mischievous smiles.  
"Why not test it out?" Tobias suggests and Christina nods, smiling brighter at the thought.  
"Well… sorry Uriah." I say before leaning back, pulling my gun forward and aiming. He was running crazily, shooting whoever he could. Finally he came to stop on top of one of the tables, looking down at his kingdom of painted initiates. I locked my aim and fired the green paintball. Seconds later Uriah cried out, grabbing his you know what and falling off the table.  
"Ohhh!" Will said, cringing from the sight. "Nice shot Tris." He laughed.  
"You are so dead." Christina said in a whisper and I shake my head at the thought.  
"Not if I can get away with it easily." I whisper back. It took a minute or two before Uriah started limping to the table, his legs widened slightly as his black jeans leaked the green paint.  
"Who the hell did that?" He demanded between sharp breaths. Quickly I shove my gun to Tobias and innocently stare at Uriah.  
"You!" Uriah shouted, pointing at Tobias who glares at me. "I'm going to-"  
"INITIATES! Meet at the train tracks in 10 minutes. It's time for a friendly game of capture the flag!" Zeke shouted through the dining hall, cutting Uriah off before he could even propose his threat to Tobias.  
"You are so going to repay me for that little stunt later." Tobias whispered in my ear as we walked out of the dining hall together. He wrapped his arm around my waist and squeezed me tightly, kissing my hair before pushing through the dining hall doors.

~.~.~

Making teams was easy; each team got 5 dauntless born and 4 transfers. Zeke and Shauna called their team Jupiter (I don't really know why) and Tobias and I chose Team 10(get it 6+4… ehh… no the initiates didn't like it either)

Team Jupiter: Jason, Olivia, Patrick, Jeon, Paul, Roxy, Paulina, Raleigh, George

Team 10: Nina, Edward, Sandra, Rachel, Ariel, Jamie, Danny, William, Jackson

Tobias and I agreed to get off first, our team not protesting at the thought of leaving the cart we were all packed into.  
"Okay guys, start making a plan." Tobias announces.  
"Wait you're not going to help us?" Edward demands.  
"We'll help you guys but you have to set the plan up and run us through what to do." I say.  
"Did you win, during your year Six?" Ariel asks me as she bounced on her toes lightly.  
"Yes, but my plan may not work for your situation. You guys have to figure it out." I say causing the eruption of plans to hit the team. Everyone screamed an idea while trying to ridicule the other.  
"Wow, great team we've got here." Tobias whispers to me sarcastically.  
"If anything, their screaming is going to give away our location." I say in disdain.  
"We have time, Zeke and I will use our walkie talkies when the teams are set."  
"THAT'S IT!" Jamie cries loudly making everyone quiet down. "What the hell are we going to do! Our team is fighting over a damn plan and the game hasn't even officially started. We are not going to all go in and attack, we all get hit, we all lose our defense and the other team wins. I don't care who suggested it but I think our best move is through the tress."  
"Paulina can climb, there's high chances that she will put it high up in a tree." William adds.  
"Exactly." Jamie says. "The tress are full of leaves, we'll be hidden by the foliage and can attack from above while trying to retrieve the flag. How many here are good climbers?" Jamie asks and hands rose quickly. Danny, Nina, Jackson, and Sandra seemed to be the only ones in the group who could scale a tree with ease.  
"Okay now the flag, we need 2 people. Again good climbers and not afraid of heights."  
"Why heights?" Ariel asks her in a quickened voice.  
"Because our flag is going up." She points to the Ferris wheel and everyone gawks at the top.  
"We'll do it. Six and I will climb to the top and tie it to that spook right there." Tobias says in a strong confident voice. He hates heights, it's one of his four fears, why the heck would he suggest going up there?  
"Yeah, Four and I will go." I say, taking the flag and looping it in one of the belt loops on my jeans. I could never question Tobias if he was sure he wanted to go up the Ferris wheel in front of the initiates. He would never forgive me."  
"Alright the rest of us, we attack. Quietly though. Stay hidden, stay down, but intervene when someone in the trees gets spotted." Jamie says everyone nodding in agreement.  
"Hey Four, you set?" Zeke asks in a robotic voice through the walkie talkie.  
"All good over here, announce the start." Tobias says and then a large siren blows through the land.  
"Let the games begin." Zeke replies and we were off.

* * *

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**-Valentina**


	5. Chapter 5- I Want You With Me Forever

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing. All rights to Veronica Roth.**

* * *

Chapter 5

It felt familiar, climbing the Ferris wheel with Tobias on my tail as warm wind pushed me back even though I persisted forward. I looked down every so often to see the pale face of Tobias, his eyes however screamed fury. He wasn't going to allow his fear of heights to keep him from getting to the top.  
"How about this spoke? It looks good enough." Tobias suggests to the metal bar sticking out to his right. It's probably the 4th one we passed and with the last 3 he has suggested we leave it there.  
"No, we're aren't high enough." I say, pulling myself up the ladder with more speed.  
"Some things don't change do they?" He asks me with a small laugh.  
"Just keep going, we're almost at the top anyways."  
"Fine." He grunts.  
We continue up, the ground below shrinking into small specks of handcrafted trees, and almost doll house worthy buildings. Once the ladder ends I begin to climb toward the highest seat, it is of course only hanging by a few screws and will most definitely fall if we sit on it but the flat area around it seems sturdy and since we have to guard the flag might as well stay up. With a last pull I manage to sit on the edge of the flat surface with my feet dangling to the world 200ft. below. Tobias joins me seconds later and stares with his mouth hanging open to the ground.  
"We are at the highest point, isn't that cool?" I ask him in awe of the horizon.  
"No-not really." He replies shakily. I turn and still see him looking to the ground.  
"Hey," I take his chin between my fingers. "Don't look down, look up at me." I say and he allows my hand to move his face to see mine.  
"Much better view now." He says and I laugh. I kiss him for a moment, my hand still curled under his chin and my other holding his. When we pull away Tobias leans his head onto mine, our warm breaths mixing and heating my cheeks. I can smell his scent, it's so familiar to me that when a large amount consumes me I try to cherish the memory forever. There is no way to describe Tobias' smell, it's light and pleasant with a thought of safety and home springing to mind when it hits my nose. I concluded that his smell could only be called Tobias because there is nothing in this world like it.  
"You're my whole world Tris Prior." Tobias says as his thumb runs over my left hand, heating it with his warm touch. "Do you know what was the first thing I saw when we meet?" He asks me and I nod against his head making a sound of agreement. "You were a grey blur at first, I could have sworn someone picked up and dropped you over the building. But then you took my hand and I helped you out of that net and that's when I saw your eyes. Icy blue with a tint of grey in them. Nothing in that moment mattered because I was living in your eyes, reading all of your expressions and trying to find this deep meaning I could have sworn I held with you. I wanted to know more and say more but I couldn't."  
"What did you want to say then?" I ask him.  
"Hi, I'm Four. It's nice to meet you." He and I laugh at the thought, him being all soft and kind like he is now.  
"I'm glad we came up here." I say after finding composure.  
"As high up as we are I'm glad you're here holding my hand." He says making me smile.  
"You know the first time I saw you I couldn't help but feel the urge to feel all of your perfectly chiseled features?" My hand lifts and I run my fingers over his cheek, around his right ear and down his jaw line where I find the end of his chin. Gently I rub my thumb over his soft lips and pull him in for another long kiss. Once again his hand holds mine and he runs his thumb over my fingers, looming over my empty ring finger.  
"Tris." He breathes, cutting off our kiss. "I need to tell you something else." He says and I nod reluctantly. I don't want to end our kiss but he wants to talk so I'll let him. "I want you to stay with me forever. When I'm insecure about something I can talk to you, when I'm happy about something you make it 10 times better. Every morning I wake up to see your gorgeous blue eyes and every night I dream about them. I enjoy how your hand fits in mine and how your nose presses into my cheek when you sneak a peck as I make us coffee in the morning. Your voice as you sing in the shower makes my heart beat faster and my body freeze from the beauty. But most of all the way you show yourself as a strong woman but deep down love everyone and everything because they all mean something to you. I don't want to lose any of those things, I don't want to wake up to new eyes or feel a different set of lips on my cheek. I want you with me forever, so Tris Prior, will you marry me?"  
"Tobias…" I begin to say, my words freezing in my mouth as tears roll down my cheeks. So instead of saying those 2 words 'I do', I nod vigorously and take both of his cheeks in my hands, kissing him warmly.  
"I'm going to take that as a yes." He says making me laugh.  
"I love you so much Tobias." I say kissing him again and running my thumbs over his wet cheeks. Yes, Tobias was crying but that only made me realize how much more this means to him.  
"Here, I got you a ring." He says, scooting back a little and shoving his hand into his pocket. When he pulled out the small circle I could hardly make out the design but I knew it was silver since it was shining in the moonlight. His hand took my shaky left one and he slide the ring onto my ring finger. It fit perfectly and when he lifted my hand and kissed my ring finger, which was now occupied by the ring, I felt as though he was marking me as his own for life. When he released my hand I lifted it high into the moonlight to make a better sight out of it. What I did see was the silver ring with a small single black diamond.  
"It's so beautiful Tobias." I say, my eyes not leaving the new piece of jewelry.  
"I knew you'd love it." He said, wrapping his arms around me and kissing the top of my head. Gently he took my hand and placed it on my stomach, his own covering it entirely.  
We sat in silence, listening to the wind and lose seats swinging below. In the distance a firework was released and a shout of joy erupted through the land.  
"10!10!10!10!" Was chanted as a weight of satisfaction settled on me.  
"We win." I say into Tobias' chest.  
"We always do." He chimes making me laugh.  
So there it was, our victorious team chanting their win, Tobias holding me as close as possible with his chin rested on my head, and the light sound of his heart beating against his warm chest in a repetitive _thump, thump._

~.~.~

His warm lips pressed on my face, peppering me with kisses. It wasn't until he kissed both of my closed eyes that I realized it was morning. However I kept my eyes shut and allowed him to kiss both of my temples and nose before snickering.  
"You're awake." He said, his warm breath falling on my face.  
"No I'm not." I reply sluggishly.  
"Yes you are, no come on." He kissed the bridge of my nose and then in between my eyebrows. His chin stayed poised by my lips so, with my eyes closed I kissed him just under his lips. Steadily he slipped his chin down and replaced it with his lips. His hand came up to hold the back of my head as his other propped him over me. My hands lurched up his abs and stayed on his chest. Our kiss turned into a make out session and despite my want for more Tobias was right, we had to get up.  
"Come on, it's 5:45." He said as we both breathed against each other's mouth.  
"Tobias!" I demand, smacking his chest with the back of my hand. "How dare you wake me up before 6?" I say with a pout.  
"Because I couldn't stand sleeping, all I want to do is see you." He said with a cocky grin.  
"Meanie, you go shower and I'm gonna sleep." I say, shoving him back to his side.  
"Okay, whatever you say Tris." He got up and started for the bathroom while I reached for his pillow and wrapped it close to my face, indulging in his scent. As I slowly fell asleep I could hear the shower turn on and soon felt the hot air heat the room nicely.  
No one beside myself knows about Tobias' fears. One of which is being in confined spaces. He hates small, tight areas where he can hardly move. The bathroom is one of them. Yes, he shuts the door for basic uses but while he showers he leaves it cracked because with the steam building up in there he would feel constricted. Our bathroom isn't anything large anyways, a toilet, shower, and sink is all that fits. So while he showers in the early hours of the morning light and steam fill our room in a comforting way that I don't mind wrapping myself in the moment.  
I twist my ring with my fingers, smiling at it through the dim bathroom light. On the train last night I got a better view of the outside but it was only when we got home that Tobias told me to take it off and look on the inside. I did and found IV & VI engraved in the center.  
I studied Roman Numerals once, Caleb had this book on his desk that he left out, and I think I was 9. I snuck it into my room and hid it under my bed only reading it whenever I could sneak it out of the house. In no way was I intellectually ready to be like Caleb and sneak books into my room to constantly read but I was content with learning about Roman times and found their numbers very interesting. I could write 1-50 in Roman Numerals and found pride in that despite having to hide that ability from everyone. So when I saw IV & VI I could instantly tell that it meant 4 and 6.  
"Do you like it?" Tobias asks me, emerging from the bathroom with a towel around his waist and one running through his hair.  
"I love it." I say, smiling at the ring. He walks towards the dresser, sliding on a pair of boxers and then black jeans. As he did that I sat up, bringing my knees to my chest from the sudden uneasy morning sickness slurring inside of me. I haven't thrown up much but I've had a lot more motion sickness. To ease the feeling I pick at the neck hole of the shirt I was wearing and cover my nose. It was Tobias' and his smell covered it.  
"Why do you do that?" He asks me, a small smirk of confusion on his face.  
"Do what?" I ask my words muffled from the shirt.  
"Do that, smell all of my things."  
"Because you smell good." I say without hesitation.  
"Oh really? And what do I smell like?" He asks me and I shrug.  
"I can't describe it, it's literally impossible. All I can say is that it reminds me of safety and your love."  
"Wow, I honestly thought you were going to say something like 'manly' or 'soap'." He says making me laugh.  
"Yes Tobias you smell like soap but that's not the point. You have a very distinct smell that I love and I plan on taking every bit of it with me forever."  
"Okay whatever you say." He says, sliding on a black shirt that showed off every chiseled muscle on his chest and arms. "Do you know what you smell like?" He asks me and I shake my head. "You smell like a meadow." I furrow my eyebrows and tilt my head slightly.  
"What?" I ask with a small laugh. "How do you even know what meadow smells like?"  
"Well you know that fence. Zeke and I were training initiates together for the first time, when we were 17. We took a visit to the fence where Eric had all the dauntless born. He wanted to try a joined training so he took our initiates back to the compound leaving Zeke and I and two friends who were the guards. Zeke asked if they were willing to sneak us through the gate and they agreed so while a truck delivering some farm fresh foods came through we snuck out and walked past the farms to an endless amount of meadows. It was glorious, the sun sparkling in the horizon and the grass blowing in the wind. It didn't smell like the compound or the outdoors after you've been trapped underground for so long. It was fresh and airy and somehow you bring back that memory."  
"Maybe we should sneak out of the fence, relive that smell together." I suggest as he sits by my feet.  
"That would be absolutely lovely, but first we have some initiates to deal with." He kisses me nose and I laugh.  
"Fine, I'll go shower." I groan, standing up and heading to the bathroom.  
"I'll be in the kitchen making coffee!" He calls and I give a moan of understanding.  
As I shower my hands run over my stomach numerous times. It's almost 7 weeks and now there is a bump. Not to large but I could now see it when I wear tight clothes. If someone didn't know I was pregnant they'd think I was gaining weight.  
When Tobias mentioned my singing yesterday I never really noticed that I did it, it was something that sort of happened as a pass by. Even now I'm possibly singing an incomparable song that I heard as a kid.  
Singing to yourself in abnegation was a sign of selfishness but singing to someone else was shown as a sign of love. My mom would sing to me as a baby but by the time I turned 7 my dad convinced her that it was coddling and she was forced to stop. I hated that, I loved her singing and those songs but my dad refused to have me babied. So I sang to myself at night, light enough so no one but myself could hear. I miss her voice though.  
"Tris?" My singing catches in my throat and I wait for Tobias to say more. "Sweetie I get that it's early but you can't stay in the shower forever. Common, I want breakfast." Tobias says behind the curtain.  
"Fine, let me get rid of the conditioner in my hair." I say, letting my head fall back under the warm stream of water. When it's all rinsed out I shut off the water and reach for my large towel. I wrap it around my chest and step out so see Tobias leaning against the door frame.  
"Creeping much." I laugh as I comb through my wet hair. I pull it back into a ponytail and turn to see Tobias smiling. "What?" I ask, a smile working onto my face.  
"You're just so beautiful." He says and I smack his arm while walking by.  
"And you're a great liar." I add, opening my drawer and pulling out my under clothes and a pain of black jeans and a tight tank top.  
"No, I'm actually an awful liar. And you are truly a beautiful woman." He kisses my cheek, places my coffee on the dresser and heads out to the living room.  
"We're leaving in 5." He says. I throw on my clothes, sliding on some black socks and then my black combat boots. When I walk into the living room sipping my coffee Tobias is watching the news, the only TV channel available anywhere.  
"Ready." I say grabbing his attention. He smiles at me turning off the TV. I walk to the entrance mirror and eye my look, turning sideways to see how fat I look. I puff out an air of annoyment. My stomach looks annoying; I mean it's just there!  
Tobias comes up behind me and slides his hands on my stomach.  
"They make you look beautiful." He whispers into my ear as his hands slide up the top and push it up so I can see my bare stomach with Tobias covering it.  
"And fat." I whisper, covering his hands and glaring at it.  
"No, you could never look fat. They make you look amazing, and they show a whole new side to you. I love you like this. I love you no matter how you look." He kisses behind my ear and then slides my top back over my stomach.  
"Common, breakfast is calling." He takes my hand and leads me out the front door, both of us sipping coffee and talking about ranking today.

* * *

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	6. Chapter 6- I'd Go Crazy Without You

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing. All rights to Veronica Roth.**

* * *

Chapter 6

We were almost to the cafeteria when Will, with Chris on his back, came running past us.  
"Slow pokes!" Chris called, laughing loudly as her and Will turned the corner.  
"Get on, we're going to beat them." Tobias says, pointing to his back. I jump on and he begins to run quickly, slowing to a jog when we catch up with Chris and Will again.  
"Hi guys." Chris says casually waving at me.  
"Hi." I say, waving back with a large smile. Chris face turns from happiness to utter shock.  
"Tris Prior what the hell is that on your finger!?" She demands.  
"Nothing." I tease, whispering to Tobias to lose both of them. He begins to run full speed again and we lose the two within seconds.  
We burst through the cafeteria with loud obnoxious laughter. Everyone turned to look at us, many of initiates smiled. Tobias continued to walk with me on his back towards our table where Zeke, Shauna, Lynn, Marlene, and Uriah sat. Zeke had a scowl on his face and was sitting cross-armed like a mad 5-year-old.  
"Glad to see you're in a good mood this morning." Tobias says to Zeke as I hop off his back and sit on the bench next to Marlene.  
"You guys did not deserve that win." Zeke snapped.  
"I would like to contradict that," Uriah began. "From what I heard your team put the flag up in the trees and Tris and Four's team found it because it was so predictable. If you ask me all seems fair."  
"I didn't ask you!" Zeke demanded. "And if anything you guys had no right to put your flag up on the old Ferris Wheel."  
"Anyone from a mile away could see where it was, we didn't tuck it away in one of the seats, we literally hung it up." I remind him.  
"Yeah but you guys were guarding it, what if one of our team players went after it but you shot them down?"  
"We wouldn't shoot anyone down from that height and if anything it shows them what it truly means to be dauntless." Tobias is quick to answer and Zeke just gives an anguished breath, shaking his head in dismay.  
"You two suck so bad right now." He finally says, Tobias and I just laugh in response.  
"TRIS PRIOR!" Christina bursts through the cafeteria doors, her eyes jumping on every person until they land on mine. I only notice now the giant scrape on Will's knee, a matching one on Chris' elbow.  
"You better start talking!" She demands, a small smile edging on her lips.  
"Well," I begin, sliding my hand into Tobias' and smiling at everyone at our table. "We're getting married." I hold up my left hand allowing the group to see it. Everyone squeals and cheers, the guys clapping Tobias on the back, the girls hugging me and demanding the whole story. I tell them how it happened, his sweet words, everything that made the moment special. By the time I'm finished all the guys were listening and the other table was finding a fascination in it.  
"Guys," Chris squeals in a girly way. "That's so great!" She demands throwing her arms around me.  
"I think this calls for a celebration." Zeke announces, his foul mood seeming almost non existent.  
"Sounds good, how about our place after initiation training?" Tobias asks and everyone agrees. We return to eating, the girls pushing Tobias away from me so they could all admire the ring.  
"This is my favorite part." I say, sliding the ring off and showing the engraved 'IV & VI'  
"4 and 6, that's your guys' trainers names." Lynn says knowingly.  
"Yeah, it makes it all the more special that he included our other personalities." I say looking up to see Tobias sitting across the table from me. I slide the ring back on and we return to our food.

~.~.~

Today we set up the rankings, the first people that we would cut. The initiates were training all together doing a little hand-to-hand combat and using the punching bags.  
"Okay so we've got to cut 3 people leaving 15 for the next round of initiation." Zeke says leaning back into his seat and extending his arm around Shauna.  
"Why do we even have to cut people? That was Eric's rule he isn't here. We can keep all the 18." I said in an attempt to protect these people who I have oddly become concerned about.  
"Because that's the way things work now Tris. If we don't cut anyone then the initiates from the last three years will find reasons to retaliate and then what? We have to deal with the angry dauntless that lost their friends and their families because we cut them." Shauna says in a voice that is trying to ease me.  
"But Shauna their good people, we can get them all jobs and-"  
"That's not the problem Tris." Tobias cuts in. "Sweetie like Shauna said, we don't need people retaliating and demanding the return of the past dauntless we sent away to be factinless. Do you want Peter to demand the return of Molly and Drew because in his fairness it will happen and I don't know what they would do to you."  
"Tobias I can take care of myself." I say, crossing my arms across my chest.  
"I know you can but who will take care of the babies? Molly, Drew, and Peter. Those three will avenge themselves and I don't want them to target our babies."  
"I won't let them though!" I snap causing everyone at the table to look at me in shock. "Look I don't want to be the reason that these guys wake up hungry every morning, I don't want them to look back and realize that it was my fault they don't belong anywhere."  
"It's not your fault though, it's the way things work." Tobias says softly.  
"Well then I don't want any part of ruining someone's future. Excuse me." I stand up and place a hand on my churning stomach. Tobias stands up after me, running to where I was walking.  
"Tobias, please give me a minute." I say, covering my mouth with my hand as I try to cover my attempt to swallow the bile crawling up my throat.  
"Your sick, what's wrong?" He asks me, his hand falling on the small of my back as he stands in front of me.  
"Nothing." I croak, my feet slowly weakening under me. "I just-" But those words hardly make it out of my mouth before I shove Tobias with as much force as possible and throw up into the garbage can by the door. Tobias, Shauna, and Zeke all run to me. Shauna picks my hair up and ties it with one of her many black hair ties.  
"Should we get Christina?" Zeke asks while Tobias runs his hand over my back.  
"No, it's morning sickness. She just needs to go home and rest." Tobias sighs, taking my hair from Shauna.  
"But it's not morning." Zeke said, I swear that comment just made him sound like a bigger idiot than he already is.  
"Stupid!" Shauna scolded, a hard smack hitting him. "Just because it's called morning sickness doesn't mean that it can't happen at any time of the day."  
"Oh." Zeke says in a confused manner. I cough once more and spit out the leftovers in my mouth.  
"Here, clean your mouth." Shauna hands me a paper towel and before standing up straight I wipe my mouth clean.  
"You should go home, take some medicine and have a nap or something." Tobias suggests, holding my side lightly.  
"No, I just want to go for a walk. You guys chose who to cut and I'll go clear my head." I say.  
"Tris, I'm not comfortable with you walking around the compound in your condition."  
"What condition? I just have a little morning sickness. That's all."  
"Tris-" Shauna tries but I glare at her.  
"If I don't feel good I'll go home." I say, pushing Tobias' hand off my hip. "Consider who you cut because they're just kids." I warn before walking out the door and turning towards the pit.

~.~.~

It could have been hours, the whole day maybe but I wouldn't have noticed or cared. All I could do is sit with my feet dangling over the pit as I rested my arms on the railing and my chin on top of them. So much happens when you take the time to look. People have stupid fights over the dumbest of things and others live through a first time experience. Their first kiss, first hand holding, first debate. It is all quite fascinating, just the way people work and how they react.  
Alfred, a guy from last year's initiation crouched beside me and gave a cocky grin. "Hey Tris, I understand you must be coming up with some crazy idea or just trying spy on whoever but we need to start setting up for the rankings announcement and we sort of need to get the lighting set up where you're sitting."  
"Sorry Alfred, I'll move." I say, pulling myself up to my feet and wiping my hands on the hem of my shirt.  
"Anything wrong?" He asks me as he lifts a silver lamp onto the railing and begins to screw it on.  
"Not really." I say watching his hands fiddle with the screwdriver.  
"You sure?" He tests, the side of his mouth cocking into a grin.  
"Just rankings sort of angered me."  
"You didn't agree with the others on who should be cut?"  
"Not that, I just didn't agree with the system."  
"That seems pretty accurate." He starts unwinding the wire, slowly handing it down the pit to another girl.  
"Yeah, I don't like how we have to cut everyone. I don't think it's right to exile these innocent people to a life of hunger and emptiness." Alfred's grin drops and he starts to look a little sad.  
"You know Monica didn't make it after the second part of initiation?" He said in a whisper. It all hits me suddenly.  
Monica and Alfred were twin transfers from Amity. Monica was guaranteed a top 3 spot but Harold, a jealous low ranker, couldn't stand the thought of being factionless. One night while everyone was asleep Harold scooped up Monica and gently walked her to the chasm. When she finally got to her senses and screamed this blood-churning screech he tossed her over and walked away. No one knew about it until the end of initiation when he ranked 10th place and word got around it was his fault. He was executed for his crimes after we used some of the serum from candor and got all the truth from him. Alfred was given permission to be the executor but he refused saying it would be something to haunt him forever.  
"I know Alfred, she would've been here if the accident didn't happen."  
"It wasn't an accident, it was a murder. She would've been happy here if it weren't for Harold. She's gone though and so is that bastard."  
"You know it's okay to be upset with the past." I say, addressing how he always smiles.  
"We can't always dwell in the past though, otherwise we have no future." Alfred's smile returns and he clicks on the bright LED light. "See you later Tris." He winks at me and turns around, scooping up a cardboard box full of lights and heading to the next section.

~.~.~

"Hey Tris, where have you been?" Marlene asks as I slide on the bench at our table and place my tray by Tobias'.  
"Oh you know, here, there, everywhere." This receives a smirk from her.  
"You okay?" Tobias whispers to me, placing his fork down and leaning close.  
"I'm fine." I say, poking my cup of rice.  
"You know we can talk about it later." He suggests, running his hand up my back.  
"Later." I assure him. "I'd rather just finish dinner for now." He nods and starts to eat his side of peas.  
"So what'd you really do?" Tobias asks me, taking a piece of my chicken.  
"I was just sitting under the railing by the pit, you know creeping on people and stuff." I say causing Tobias to laugh.  
"Anything interesting?"  
"Nah, I just realized how stupid people are because they fight over the dumbest stuff and… and I realized what we're doing wrong."  
"What do you mean?" He asks.  
"The system, it's all wrong. We encourage everyone to be an enemy and to fear one another. If they didn't have to worry about being factionless then they wouldn't have to hurt one another."  
"Hurt one another how?"  
"Remember Monica, from last year?" I ask.  
"Yeah, Harold tossed her over the chasm. Alfred… he was… I'm surprised that guy can keep a smile that strong."  
"Remember what happened to me during my initiation?"  
"I try not to. I would've lost you to Al, Drew, and Peter." His voice cracks and he swallows heavily. He turns away slowly, as though looking at me will break him.  
"Hey," I pull his chin back around to see me. "My point isn't to expose all of the wrong things that happen but I'm trying to say that if these initiates have nothing to lose to then we would have fewer people hurting each other."  
"I love that you realize that. Not many people can see that this isn't just to show your bravery but it's also to show your strength and ability to keep those people around you together. I'm not a leader though and despite Eric not being a trainer he still controls Dauntless along side Max and as hard as we try they won't let it happen."  
"Sometimes I think you're the only one that can convince me not to lose my head over something like this. You seem to be the only one keeping me sane when I think I might go crazy."  
"I love you, crazy or not." Tobias pulls me by my side and places a kiss on my head.  
"I love you too Tobias." I say snuggling into he crook of his neck.

* * *

**Wow I've got 15 comments, 14 favourites, and 30 followers!**

**You are all needs to be thanked for that, all of your comments mean the world to me and encourage me to continue writing and creating these fanfics. Every single one of you deserve a slice of dauntless cake for this amazing confidence boost you have brought to me. However I don't have the ability to give you the cake myself but let's just pretend that the next time you eat chocolate cake it was from me as a large thank you! :) **

**Keep being brave readers! **


	7. Chapter 7- Your Lips Will Remind Her

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing. All rights to Veronica Roth. **

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Chapter 7

We watched the rankings, listened to Max's stupid speech and then allowed the names to come on the board. When they did appear I instantly turned into Tobias' chest so I wouldn't have to watch the 3 weak, innocent initiates gawk at the board and crumble to the floor at the thought of not belonging anywhere. Tobias ran his hand up and down my back and kissed my head repeatedly as we rocked back and forth slightly.  
"She was- I- How could this happen?" I sob into Tobias' chest as the dauntless exited the room.  
"I know. I'm sorry." Tobias said lightly.  
"NO!" A loud screech came from the door, I turned my head lightly ultimately regretting it as I watched two men drag Danny out.  
"Stop shoving." Jeon barked at the two men escorting him and Paul away.  
"I want to go home." I say shakily running my hand through my hair and stepping away from Tobias.  
"Tris-"  
"How will we do this again!? How are we going to cut 5 more people?"  
"Tris we don't do it, the numbers do." Tobias says sounding rather irritable.  
"I don't want to have to watch another kid being dragged away as they beg for another chance."  
"Danny wasn't strong enough, she never won fights and she hardly tried."  
"She sounded so scared though." I say, her shrieking still sounding in my mind. Tobias doesn't say anything though, instead he places a hand on my stomach and looks to me knowingly.  
"I know where this is coming from." He says softly.  
"I don't want our babies to be screaming for me if they don't make it through dauntless initiation."  
"We'll work it out, now c'mere." He pulls me towards him again, my face fitting into his chest.

~.~.~

It was probably the longest dwelling week of my life. I had to help administer tests to the initiates and watch all of them lose their minds at having to deal with these terrorizing fears everyday. Their screams and sobbing would echo through my mind and by the time my head hit the pillow at night I was past exhausted. I was drained from all of my happiness and slowly sinking in my own sadness. The dreams that came with this weren't any better. Some nights it would be that I went through my own fears again, other nights it would be me watching Danny kick and sob and scream for them not to take her away. Tonight though… tonight was nothing I could ever explain.

"Here are the initiate rankings!" Max announces, the board illuminating with 10 names.  
The cheering began but I drained out that sound, my mind only focused on a certain crying girl. She was kicking in the arms of two men, crying for them to let her go. When she got one of the men in the throat they dropped her immediately, causing her to hit the ground hard.  
"Mommy!" The girl sobbed, scrambling to her feet and to my direction. What is this? Who is this girl? "Mommy, mommy don't let them take me away!" She cried, collapsing herself around me, and sobbing into the crook of my neck.  
"Shh it's okay," I try, running my finger through her loose ponytail, which was allowing her brown ombered hair to fall in her face slightly. "I've got you." I say, knowing for sure I'm her mom and this is my little girl who didn't make it through initiation and needs me.  
"They're going to take me away." She whispers in despair.  
"I won't let them, I promise not to let you go. Ever." I say into the girl's hair, gripping her just a little tighter.  
As though to prove higher power standards Eric and Max approach, I hold my daughter behind me as she continues to cry.  
"You can't take her away."  
"She failed initiation, we have every right to take her away from dauntless." Max says, his face not even showing a bit of emotion.  
"She is not leaving, I won't allow it!"  
"You may not but everyone else will. Gentlemen." It happens so quickly. Two people grab her from behind and when I turn to grab her Max and Eric take hold of me, restraining me from grabbing my daughter.  
"MOM!" She cries. "MOMMY HELP ME!" She pleads, her body trembling as she was dragged away.  
"YOU CAN'T DO THIS!" I scream at Eric, trying to shake them off me.  
"We already have." Max concludes, my daughter giving one last call for me and then a sob that causes me to crumble.  
"I love you." Is all I can say before falling to my knees and collapsing my head on the ground.

"Tris. Tris honey you're having a nightmare." Tobias shakes me awake and I can instantly feel the warm tears falling down my face. "It's okay, it was just a nightmare." He assured me, wrapping his arms around my waist and sitting us up against the headboard. "Do you want tot talk about it?"  
"No." I say rapidly, more tears falling down my face.  
"Okay." He says as he lifts his hand to my face and wipes away the tears coating my cheeks.  
"They took her away, our baby. She didn't make it through initiation and they ripped her away from me. It was like having my heart teared out of my chest." I say absently, not even considering the fact that I just told him I didn't want to talk about it.  
"No one is going to take away either one of our babies." Tobias says softly, placing his hand on my stomach. "I wouldn't allow it to happen." He assures me, planting a kiss on my forehead.  
"What if we can't protect them? What if they're divergent or chose another faction and we can't be there to save them from themselves?"  
"We'll teach them how to take care of themselves."  
"I haven't even had them yet and I feel like my life was made to protect these two tiny people."  
"Maybe this," He rubs his hand in a circle on my stomach before continuing, "Is our destiny."  
"You think so?" I ask him.  
"I know so. We didn't plan them but we sure as hell will keep them safe and love them just the same." I smile at his words and pull him in for a kiss.  
"You are going to make a great dad Tobias." I say softly.  
"And you an even better mother." He says back, kissing my nose and then pulling the blankets up so I'm covered once again.  
"Now sleep. You need to rest." He commands and I do as told, rubbing into is chest and falling asleep with his heart beat against my cheek.

~.~.~

We finally made it to the last rankings and I was back, leaning against Tobias and waiting to turn away so wouldn't have to see 5 initiates lose everything they've worked for.  
"Is there an earth quake?" Tobias asks snapping me out of my trance.  
"What?" I ask stunned making Tobias snicker.  
"Sweetie you're shaking like crazy, calm down."  
"I still hear Danny, I still hear her screaming at night." I say in a whisper. Tobias pulls my chin up so I meet his eyes.  
"Hey," he says with a small grin. "It'll work out. They'll be fine, they are all strong kids who know how to take care of themselves."  
"Okay." I say allowing him to kiss me before Max congratulates the passing initiates and then steps away from the board.

1. Nina  
2. Roxy  
3. Jamie  
4. Edward  
5. William  
6. Rachel  
7. Ariel  
8. Patrick  
9. Jason  
10. Jackson  
11. Olivia  
12. Sandra  
13. Raleigh  
14. Paulina  
15. George

No one screamed or fought while leaving the compound. Just five dropped heads that were ushered away as a group and then a thunderous applause and cheering as we welcomed the 10 new dauntless members.  
Somehow I managed to get through the crowd and towards the group of celebrating 16 year olds.  
"Six!" Jamie said, a smile so wide it made me break free with one myself.  
"You made it." I cheer, hugging her tightly.  
"Thank you so much!" She said after we pulled away.  
"No, you did it all by yourself, no need to thank me." I say. "Any idea what job you're going to pick? Position 3 almost guarantees that possibility of getting what you want."  
"I don't know really. What are you when you don't train the initiates?" She asks me.  
"Ambassador for dauntless. Four works in the control room as intelligence. I can't really work though in a few months since, you know." I nod to my stomach making Jamie's smiles broaden.  
"Well what would you do for work?" She asks.  
"I talked to the tattoo and piercing parlor. They say when I'm told to stop train hopping to go and work the cashier for them."  
"Wait does working as a tattoo artist count as a job?" She asks me.  
"Of course. You like art?"  
"Yeah, in Amity there was always paint and I would draw for days on end."  
"Well consider it, you can design some awesome tattoos, I might even get one if you manage to make a cool design."  
"Awesome! Thanks Six." She gives me one final hug before going to Jackson who stands a good 2 heads taller than her. She tiptoes to kiss him and he helps her by lifting her from her hips.  
A first for everything and I have a feeling this is the first time I watched what Tobias and I must look like when he towers over me yet somehow makes that look like a perk in our relationship.  
"Excuse me miss but have you seen my beautiful fiancé who has managed to escape once again?" Tobias comes from behind, slipping his hand in mine and spinning me in a circle before pulling me to him.  
"I think she got lost in your eyes sir." I reply, allowing my legs to fall around Tobias' hips as he lifts me the same way Jackson did to Jamie.  
"Oh darn it now she is gone for good. Do you mind being her replacement?" He asks and I lose it, cracking up at this charade.  
"I think she will come back if you kiss her. Your lips might remind her of where she truly belongs." I suggest and Tobias smirks.  
"What an excellent suggestion." He presses his lips to mine as I hold around his neck and take advantage of my higher vantage point.  
"Did it work?" He asks me, his eyes still closed as we rest our foreheads on one another's.  
"Open your eyes and see." I say, kissing each of his eyelids before he opens them and smiles at me.  
"Yup, it's you. No one else has those icy blue eyes." He laughs, kissing me once more before placing me back on the floor and taking my hand. We walk towards one of the tables and sit with our group of friends. The crowd of celebrating dauntless not dying down until nearly midnight when everyone is demanded to clear out. Tobias and I walk back to our apartment and fall asleep in each other's embrace and for the first time in 2 weeks I didn't have a nightmare and it felt as though all of those screams and sobs just flew away from my mind.

* * *

**Is it getting better? Getting worse? I sorta found writing this chapter boring, then again I had a headache so everything seemed like work at that point. COMMENT SOMETHING NICE! (or start a rant... i wouldn't mind)**

**-Valentina**


	8. Chapter 8- Crumbling From Sadness

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing. All rights to Veronica Roth.**

* * *

Chapter 8

[4 months]

I have a stomach now, a small one but it was there and Christina was showing me how the babies looked inside. They were white faces shown in front of a black background. Rumbling left the speaker and I could instantly tell the difference in heartbeats. Christina told me the highly nourished twin had the strong consistent heartbeat and was the larger of the two. The other one was smaller and had a weaker heartbeat, not something to be frightened about but still it was a prominent difference. I wish I could enjoy this, I really do but Tobias isn't with me, this is the 4th time he couldn't come. After initiation was over, Tobias had to be faction representor in replacement for Antony who had an accident jumping from the train. Now him and Zeke are constantly going to represent dauntless and I feel like I am doing this whole pregnancy on my own.  
"They look good." Christina says chiming into my thoughts and making me smile at the screen. "Do you want to know the genders?" She asks causing me to lose my smile lightly.  
"Not without Tobias." I say in a meek voice. Christina purses her lips and shuts off the screen making the heartbeats stop. She hands me a tissue behind her back and I wipe off the blue goop while she puts away the equipment. When she finishes I'm pulling my shirt down and disposing of the tissue.  
"Tris," She begins to say in her 'we need to talk' voice. "I think you need to talk with Four. He can't keep leaving you like this, these babies need to two of you and if he isn't going to be there then-"  
"I get it." I cut in. "Tobias is busy, I can't stop him from going to work. It scares me that he isn't going to be there at all but what can I do?"  
"Talk to him. Tonight." Christina demands and I nod. I stand up and Christina follows me outside where she says goodbye, coos to my stomach and then heads to the receptionist desk. I walk back to my apartment and flop down on the couch, exhaustion getting the best of me as my eyes heavily close and my breathing settles to an even restful sound.

You could say it was hormones getting the best of me but when I woke up with a pounding headache and side pain like no other I was in no mood to find Tobias just entering. The clock read 3am and he smelt of faint liquor. I knew he wasn't too drunk but the fact he was out drinking instead of coming home and asking about the ultrasound sort of, no scratch that really pissed me off.  
"Hi," He says cautiously as though I was an explosive that could blow at any second.  
"Don't fucking hi me!" I snap, standing up from the couch and fixing my hair.  
"Tris, I'm sorry for staying out later than promised-"  
"No!" I demand. "It's not even the fact you stayed out! This is the 5th ultrasound you missed, you promised to be with me through all of this but so far you seem to be failing."  
"Please don't be mad." Tobias pleads  
"I deserve to be mad! I can't work because there are no desk jobs available so I'm stuck holding these babies and hanging around the compound. You go out for "work" but come home with the smell of liquor leaking from your body? Why the hell do you think I'm mad now? Huh?"  
"Zeke and Shauna are having problems, he wanted to go and get a drink to forget about things for a while but if I can only go to work and be with you let me know so I can figure out how I will cope with these next 5 months!"  
"Oh I'm so sorry if I'm to boring to be with! I'm sorry if I'm stuck holding YOUR babies, which you impregnated me with when you chose to fucking forget protection!" I scream loudly, marching to our bedroom with Tobias close behind me.  
"Maybe if you didn't push so much to do it that night after I warned you about my lack for protection we wouldn't have those kids." Tobias points to my stomach and I cover it protectively.  
"Do you even want these kids!?" I scream so loudly that my voice hitches at the end.  
"NO, I NEVER WANTED THEM ESPECIALLY NOT IF YOU ARE GOING TO HOUND ME ABOUT WHAT I CAN AND CAN'T DO!" He screams back. "If this is what the rest of my life will be like then I absolutely hate these kids."  
"Well fine then, these are no longer your kids. You are not their father and frankly I am glad about that because there is a high chance that you will be exactly like-"  
"Don't you dare say that I will be like my father was!" He says in between clenched teeth, tears fighting in his eyes.  
"They aren't yours anymore Tobias, and I don't think we can ever be together after what you said. I get they were an accident and believe me I sometimes question if they are going to be worth it in the end but you blaming me about it? You blaming me for taking away what you once had, that isn't fair. If you saw those images and listened to their heartbeats you'd understand why it might be worth it in the end." I pull out my black hoodie and slip in over my tank top. I turn one last time to see Tobias biting his lower lip as tears burn the edge of his eyes. As I walk to the door to leave he grabs my hand.  
"Tris please." He begs and I shake away his grip.  
"It's to late Tobias. I need some time." I say not even bothering to look at his eyes. "What happened to all of those promises that you'd stay with me?" I ask, knowing he is listening to me from behind. I slip the ring form my finger. "Whatever happened to protecting one another?" I place the ring on the dresser next to me and open the door. I walk out of the room and then the apartment, slamming the door behind me with a heavy sound following.

I knew I was running, I could feel the hallways fly by me and heard the heaving of every breath that escaped my lungs, depriving me of oxygen until I inhaled another load of air. The world seemed rather distant at the moment, all I could think of was how I let Tobias go, I told him he wasn't these kids' father anymore and after all of this adrenaline is leaving my body I can't seem to figure out if I was just being plain stupid.  
I need him I need Tobias. Despite his lack of presence I need him to hold my hand at night and to fall asleep with one hand on my stomach and the other holding me close. Why am I so stupid? He'll never take me back after I admonished him and removed his rights of being father. How could I even say that he will be like Marcus? If anything Tobias is so self conscious about being like his dad there would be no chance in hell that he would do anything remotely close to what Marcus did.  
Now I can only remember how he didn't want the babies. I understand that it's hard, I have the larger load of it but why does he have to say that? It could be that he doesn't know what seeing them is like. He hasn't heard or felt anything from these babies like I have. He can't name which baby has a stronger heartbeat and which one has a lighter.  
"Chris!" I sob out, smacking the door with the palm of my hand nearly crumbling to the floor from my sadness. "Christina please open!" I beg, my knees buckling under me and now only my grip on the door frame holding me up. I hear frantic feet walking up to the door, locks being unlocked, and the door finally opening. Christina was dressed in a pair of shorts and a large shirt I suppose is Will's. Her short hair was pulled back into a messy ponytail. Her expression was tense, frightened, and rather uneasy. I choked out another sob and nearly collapsed if she hadn't slide her arms under mine and walk me to her couch.  
"Tris what's wrong?" She demands, looking deep into my eyes with her brown ones.  
"Tobias." I manage to say and she looks confused.  
"What? Is he hurt, did something happen?"  
"I talked to him. He-he was out drinking with Zeke and I asked if he even wanted the babies… he said he wished we had never had sex the day the twins were conceived." I continue my sobbing as Christina wraps her arms around me.  
"Did he say anything else?" She tries, despite my inability to make words.  
"No." I whimper into her shoulder, more tears drenching her shirt.  
"Chris I don't know what to do. I told Tobias he couldn't be the father anymore! I'm so stupid!"  
"Shh, it's okay. You're fine, I'm here for you okay?" Christina rubs my back in a comforting way and soon my sobs turn into light crying.  
"What should I do, what do you need?" Christina asks me. Pushing my shoulders back and staring at me with her brown eyes.  
"I just need to stay somewhere, for a little while at least."  
"Stay with me, I don't mind at all." She says and I thank her immensely.  
"Come on, we can share the bed. The couch is to uncomfortable anyway." She helps me up and we walk to her room where she goes back to her side of the bed. I take the other and warm up in the black sheets.  
"Thank you so much Chris." I say before dozing off.  
"Anytime Tris."

* * *

**I know, I know this chapter was shorter than the others. I apologize but I have been busy today with rowing and studying for my upcoming Science test. Chapter 9 will be longer I hope. **

**Comment what you think! :)**

**-Valentina**


	9. Chapter 9- Crying Eases Pain

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing. All rights to Veronica Roth**

* * *

Chapter 9

Christina's POV

I'm going to kill him. No, scratch that, I'm going to find him, demand multiple answers about why he hurt Tris, then I will kill him! It's been a week and all Tris has done is cry, sleep, and stay in the apartment. I fear leaving for work everyday because she seems so sad, like one wrong word and she'll crumble to a million pieces. I got the whole story after a while but it still doesn't seem right. Four must have been really desperate if he stayed away all day, drank some alcohol, and then returned late at night as though he didn't care about how Tris and the twins were.  
"Hey Tris." I say entering the room I set up for her. It's still dark, but it's not like she would care, she's too sad to do anything. She blinked a few times and then looked to me with red, groggy eyes. "It's almost lunch time and the babies still need nutrition. Do you want to maybe get up and head out for some food?" Her expression looks dull but in her eyes I could tell she was weighing her options. She's smart, she knows when it's time to be sad and time to move a little and support those babies.  
"Okay, I'll be ready in a few minutes." She finally croaks after a minute of thought. I smile to her,  
"Good, call me if you need anything." I tell her before closing the door and heading back to the living room. For the time being I sit on the couch and watch the news, nothing good is broadcasted, there isn't much to show aside from the factions at work and since all the TV shows is the news then there isn't much to do.  
It takes 10 minutes until Tris comes out of her room. Her hair was wet and she wore my to big clothes that I'm letting her borrow until Will can talk to Four about taking her stuff to my place. No one has really seen Four anywhere all week and Will has put off the whole going over and talking about the situation. I would go myself but Tris only seems comfortable with me alone so I put Will to do it.  
"I'm ready." She says in a whisper. Another thing that changed was her speaking, she has brought back her stiff voice if anything and seems to scared to speak in any different forms.  
"Wow you even showered." I say in a teasing manner.  
"I had to eventually." She murmured and my smile fades.  
"Common we can pick up Will on the way." I comment and she nods her agreement. I take her arm and walk out the door with quick strides. We walk a few apartments down, turn right and stop at Will's apartment B18. I knock push the door open (always unlocked, classic.)  
"Will!" I call into the apartment bringing him out of his room and walking towards me with quick strides.  
"Hey you." He mocks, pulling me into his strong embrace and kissing my forehead. My stomach aches that Tris has to see this but Will and I are together still. I can't enforce a no love rule, that would be punishment to Will and I.  
"Hey Tris," Will says sweetly, using his gentle voice the same one he used when Tris was attacked by Peter, Drew and… Al. "How do you feel?" He asks, venturing a little more into conversation.  
"I'm okay." Tris says back, her voice small and quite.  
"I'm glad to see that your coming with us for lunch, it's good that you get out." He says and I nod right beside him.  
"Yeah, the underground air will really make you feel good." I joke and that manages to sneak a small, almost unnoticeable smile from her.  
"Common smart-ass. I'm hungry." Will demands, pinching my side making me squirm.  
"I'm not Erudite! Can't call me a smart-ass!" I demand, pinching him back and causing the same squirming effect like mine. "Now come on, food doesn't last long here." I say and all three off us walk to the dining hall. Tris walked to my left and Will at my right, the usual walking line that we have been known to do when it was only the three of us. When we get to the dining hall and push the doors open I instantly catch the table where Uriah, Lynn, Marlene Shauna and Zeke sat. They were laughing until catching Tris. Their faces flush almost immediately and Zeke looks to the right of himself where I follow his stare. Four stood by the wall, his face low and body rigid with tension.  
"Oh shit." Will whispers and I elbow him. Four looks up and I try to steer Tris away before either of them notice each other but it's to late. Four sees us and instantly walks to us. Tris moves to the other side of Will, her eyes avoiding Four at all costs and I push the two to the table.  
"Take her to the table, make sure she eats something." I demand and he nods, taking Tris by her upper arm lightly and leading her to our friends.  
Four anguished looks to the two as they walk away quickly and attempts to pass me but I block him.  
"We need to talk." I demand, in a steady tone.  
"Not until I talk to Tris." He says in a croak but I don't budge.  
"No, first you have to talk to me!" I demand, taking his arm and pulling him out of the dining hall.  
Four is big enough to stand his ground and not allow my removal of him from the room but I'm guessing he is willing to let me pull him away because if I won't let him talk to Tris then there is no chance in hell that Tris will hear him out.  
"Start talking." I say in a sigh once the doors shut behind us.  
"I fucked up Chris." He says in a tight voice, his eyes watering with tears as he looks around the hall. "I promised Tris that I would be there for her and I haven't done anything remotely close to that. I've been jumping between factions and staying out late with Zeke because him and Lynn had that fight and I didn't even think about going back to check on Tris and ask for her permission to help Zeke… and I don't know what to do!"  
"Tris said you didn't want them." I say in a whisper, my arms crossing over my chest and lips pursing at the anger welling up inside of me.  
"Who?" He asked.  
"The twins!" I yell in frustration. He frowns, his eyes avert to the floor and he kicks his heel hard on the wall. "That's not you denying what you said, is it?"  
"I can't seem to find myself regretting those words." He says bitterly. "Well, I do want them. God I love those kids and would protect them with my own life. It's just what they do to Tris. She gets so caught up in a moment that she doesn't realize I'm hurting too, I'm scared and I can't do anything about it."  
"Look we both know Tris isn't acting any different, sure she is a little more stressed and whatever but there isn't anything significantly different."  
"You may not see it but I do. It's like she can have these moments if she wonders who is helping her through this and just because no one else is carrying a baby it means that she is all alone."  
"That's natural Four." I say, trying to figure out what else he's angry about. "She's feeling different because no one else is going through the same bodily experiences that she is and it must be scary as fuck not being able to talk or relate to anyone we know. There has to be more to this, why did you stay out late with Zeke to drink? You knew Tris was at home."  
"I already told her, Zeke and Shauna got in a fight he needed to forget about it so we went to the pit to drink a little. At least I wasn't sloppily drunk, I knew what the hell was going on around me."  
"I'm not saying you were drunk." I snap back. "Is there something that Zeke said to you that made you question the babies?" I ask.  
"Yes, Zeke who gets so wasted he falls over his own two feet told me to fear the babies and life so that's why Tris and I got in a fight." He replies sarcastically.  
"Hey! I'm trying to help you figure this out. Tris is sick, she won't eat, she just sleeps all day and those babies aren't holding up to well. I checked them yesterday despite my checking a week ago and trust me when I tell you; one of them is slipping quickly. The stress is taking toll and it is hurting your children so why don't you help me figure this shit out so we won't have to lose these babies!" Sure maybe my eyes filled with tears and my bottom lip quivered when I yelled at him the last part but I can't stand it, these babies are dying and it's only been a week since the fight.  
"Chris, I never wanted that. I never wanted any of this! I miss her I love her. God knows I need her!"  
"Four I can't do all the fixing. You have to convince her." I say before turning back to the doors and walking into the cafeteria. Tris shakes her head to Uriah as he offers he some of his food and then places her half eaten roll back on Will's tray. The table looks sorrowfully at her, no one can be happy with her like this.  
I head to the line up, looking at the various food options and finally catch sight of something that Tris might eat. Porridge, aka stiff food. When I walk back to the table and sit between Will and Tris she looks to me in confusion when I place the bowl in front of her.  
"It's porridge, that's about as plain as you'll get here. Now eat some of it." I command, not leaving any room for argument. She takes the spoon and scopes a little into her mouth. It's obvious this is something she has to do instead of something she wants to but she's eating, that's all that truly matters at the moment.  
It takes another 30 minutes until everyone has consumed their whole tray of food and Tris has eaten about ¾ of the porridge I brought her.  
"Seriously Chris, I can't eat the rest of this." She says, placing the spoon down and pleading me to let her top.  
"Tris-" I start but she stops me.  
"I don't want anymore. I had some food, I'll take those nutrition pills you gave me. The babies will be fine."  
"No!" I demand making everyone at our table stare at me in disbelief. "Tris those pills only do so much. You're eating half of what a woman in your condition should eat and you're not benefiting anyone."  
"I said I was done. It's my choice what I do and don't do." She rises from the table and walks away quickly, dropping the silver bowl in the dishes box before exiting.  
"Before any of you say that I shouldn't fight her you must all remember I'm a trained doctor and this isn't healthy. She and those babies are sick and I don't know how long they will last."  
"No one is going to judge or blame you for what you said." Shauna assures me and I nod.  
"Give her some time. She just needs to get her priorities straight at the moment and figure out what would be the best thing for herself and those kids." Lynn adds.  
"Yeah but when? Her smallest baby is hardly breathing as it is. Tobias needs to talk to her now before she takes a turn for the worse."

* * *

**Am I playing the Christina and Tris friendship to lightly? I was trying to get, protective best friend who will fight you if your words don't match hers.  
So my best friend, Julia, wanted to help with the story so together we gathered a few baby names. Boy and girl names beuase I'm still unsure of genders. The lists will be below and it would mean a ton if you could comment 1 girl name and 1 boy. I'm going for something cool, and unique. Go on and comment what you like :)**

**Girls:**  
**~Piper**  
**~Phoenix **  
**~Cody**  
**~Skylar**  
**~Ronnie**  
**~Rita **

**Boys: **  
**~Damien**  
**~Zylen**  
**~Quintrell**  
**~Jaiden**  
**~Elijah**  
**~Leonel**

**THANKS :)**

**-Valentina **


	10. Chapter 10- Fifteen Times Ten

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing. All rights to Veronica Roth.**

* * *

Chapter 10

Tobias's POV

I lost her, my Tris. The woman I was sure to marry and live with forever. I messed up, dear God I said awful things! Now she can't even look at me, I'm probably a monster in her eyes.  
How long has it been? Nearly 2 weeks since our fight? I haven't seen her come into the cafeteria after Chris talked with me a week ago. Zeke says she's fine, just being a tad to lazy with the caring of herself and the twins. That can't be true though, Tris is far too stubborn to allow anything to happen with the babies or herself in general.  
"You wanted to speak with me Four?" Max asks me, approaching the couch in his office in which I was sitting a little to straight.  
"Max this is about initiation, the cuts to be more exact." I begin to say, his eyebrow cocking at the word 'cuts'. "I think we should revoke the rule Eric thought up of 3 years ago. Why must we remove these teenagers that have been brave all along?"  
"Four your request to destroy the main rule we have lived off of and striving from for the last 3 years is rather astonishing. You know I have a feeling this has nothing to do with your wants at all."  
"Tris isn't happy with the system and she has pointed out valid reasons as to why this is not helping us. For starters we are creating monsters. No one is born evil but once you threaten their future with someone else they will do anything and everything to beat them. We have more deaths than any other faction, mainly due to murder or suicide. If these kids have nothing to fear then they can learn to be braver and stronger as a team."  
"But fear can create bravery in someone, have you forgotten that Four?"  
"They need to fear themselves, not each other." I retort.  
"How can someone fear themselves if there is nothing threatening their future?" Max asks quickly.  
"They will fear their abilities, how they can become greater and stronger and prove themselves as great dauntless."  
"The notion of cutting still stands. Besides Eric is leader along side me, unless you prove your case to him we will continue cuts." Max leaves me alone in his office and I think. How can I make Eric understand, he hates me anyways!  
With little confidence I rise to my feet and walk out of the office, my mind was set on one place. Find Eric and force him to change his mind.

Loud shotguns came from the training room, an inconsistent amount of hits and misses. Only Eric could have that sort of aim.  
"Hold fire!" I demand, entering the room and raising my hand.  
"What are you doing here Four?" Eric asks me, annoyed by my disturbing him.  
"We need to talk!"  
"About?" He snapped back, placing his gun down and rolling out his wrist.  
"About initiation. I say we stop the cuts."  
"And what thinks you have the authority to tell me what you think and don't think? I never asked for your opinion."  
"Yes but I'm a stronger dauntless member then you will ever be and as much as you want to deny it my words are taken into more consideration then yours ever will."  
"Four, just because you ranked higher then me during initiation does not mean that you have greater control then I do. I am a leader and you work in intelligence. So the answer is no! I will not change whatever you requested be done in initiation. All rules still apply." He sneers and then picks up his gun again.  
"You shoot another bullet and I will break your nose. You're going to listen to me whether you like it or not." I stand in front of his gun, my eyes narrowing equally with his.  
"Who has the loaded gun? You can break my nose but I will stop your heart. Now move Eaton, before I pull the trigger." He clicks the bullet into its chamber and smiles at me narcissistically.  
"Oh so scared." I reply sarcastically, knocking the gun from his hand and kicking back to the door. "Now you will listen!" I demand grabbing the collar of his shirt and pulling his face forward.  
"Speak fast!" He spits at me and I tell him. I explain how cuts affect behaviour and how it needs to stop. We need to work as a united group, not as individuals.  
"Let me guess. Your little girlfriend Tris wanted this?"  
"She was smart enough to figure out what will help improve Dauntless." I say defensively.  
"She's weak, she feels sorry for the ones like her and wants what she didn't receive!"  
"TRIS IS NOT WEAK!" I bark at him, twisting his collar tighter and pulling is face closer.  
"You're right. She's a selfish bitch who wants to have more people like her. She will do and say anything to manipulate you into believing what is and isn't true She has you on a leash Four, wake up a realize that the little girl card is a way to control you." Heat burned in me. My heart pounded and every part of my body tightened. No one can talk about my Tris like that; I don't care if she hates me right now. I still love her and Eric is crossing to many lines with that whole rant.  
"Don't you ever say those things about my Tris again!" I whisper harshly before bringing my fist to his nose. There is a loud crunch and then he punches back, my jaw against his fist. I release his collar and he throws himself over the table, tackling me to the ground.  
He sits on top of me, throwing a new punch where he hit me last. I smack his ear throwing him off balance and giving me enough time to turn us over and to have the better position. I elbow his temple and then hit at his neck. He coughs, gags and then pulls his knee back against my hip. I fall to my side, rising quickly and charging at Eric who has also gotten to his feet. I swipe his feet from under him but he kicks upwards, crashing his heel into my ribs. I kick his legs back, under his thigh and then step on his stomach.  
"CONCEDE!" I shout, lifting my foot and then bringing it to his stomach.  
"Never!" He spits, throwing blood onto my shoes. He grabs my ankle and twists it around, bringing me down on my back. He takes quick throws and splits my lip along with smashing my temple. "True Dauntless never ask for mercy!"  
"Then what are you?" I ask, wrapping my arms around his ankles and standing up so he falls. "TRIS IS BRAVE!" I scream loudly, punching his nose again. "YOU ARE WEAK!" I throw another punch to his temple. "CHANGE THE RULES ERIC!" I demand, my fist hitting one of his teeth and splitting open my knuckle. "OR ELSE!" I finally knee his crotch and he screams to stop. He holds himself tightly and spits the mix of my blood and his blood out of his mouth.  
"I'll change the rules!" He shouts over his heaving. "But you better watch your back Four."  
"Change the rules now. Call Max and tell him to gather a group and go look for the initiates we have lost over the last 3 years." I poise a gun that I grabbed from the table over his body and he nods furiously. Quickly he pulls out a phone and claims that I have convinced him to change to rules. No more cuts. "Good. Now that we will have un-trained members back here in weeks time I need you to train them." I click the bullet into its chamber making Eric smirk.  
"You won't shoot."  
"Try me." I suggest, shooting his leg. The bullet skims his calf but he still cries out in pain.  
"FINE! I'LL DO IT, I'LL TRAIN THEM!"  
"Good." I sneer, placing the gun down and walking, well limping, to the door. "Nice talk Eric." I laugh making him cry foul words at me.

As I walk the adrenaline leaves my body and everything begins to ache. I begin to remember Tris and how she won't know about this until a week or two when we gather all the cut initiates.  
"Four!?" A familiar voice shrieks behind me. I turn and see Chris, her eyes wild at the sight of my bloodied face.  
"Hi Chris." I say glumly.  
"What the hell happened?" She asks, taking my arm and using her hand to hold my face as she looks at the different gashes.  
"I did it." I say with a small smile.  
"Did what?" She asks nervously, dropping her hand and looking me dead in the eyes.  
"I forced Eric to change the rules. No more cuts." I say triumphantly.  
"By beating each other up!?" Her eyes grow wide.  
"Yeah." I say, unsure if that was okay.  
"Common, you need stitches on your hand. My God, half of your cheek is blue already."  
"Nothing ice can't fix." I laugh making her roll her eyes.  
"You're a huge idiot, you know that right?"  
"It's come up every so often." I say casually, taking her offered arm as she helps me to the infirmary.

** Chris's POV**

After I stitch and ice Four's face and hands he heads home. I gather my things, and the medicine for Tris, just about to drop my shift on Darla, the girl who works over night, when I hear it. My phone buzzed violently, sounding louder then I could ever imagine. It could be my paranoid mind telling me it's loud because it's important. I pick it up and quickly glance at the caller ID. Will it read and then it all hits me. He never calls unless…  
"What's wrong?!" I ask quickly, my heart beating at 100 beats a second  
"Tris! It's bad. Come quick." Will demands, hanging up and leaving me pale and shaking.  
"Chris?" Darla asks me, her face concerned and eyebrows furrowed.  
"Stay on call! Something happened to Tris and she needs help immediately. Get the other doctors." I demand, my legs already running for my apartment where I last left Tris under the care of our friends.  
There's so many hallways in dauntless. To many to count, but enough to tell what great distance you've traveled underground. The last time I counted how many different hallways I take from work to my apartment, I came up with 15. Now it feels like 15 times a hundred. 1500 hallways later I made it to my door, but the doorknob jumped around, my hand never managed to close around it. Am I delusional? Have I gone crazy! No! I'm scared, Tris is in there. I'm out here. I'm scared of what I will find.  
3 seconds and then I enter.

1….2….3….

The smell hits me first, intense vomit reeks through the whole apartment. The closet by the entrance is opened and there are towels that have flipped while the ones on top were taken away. The sweaters of Lynn, Will, Uriah, and Marlene lay scattered on the couch as usual.  
"WHERE'S CHRIS!" Uriah screams from the bedroom and I snap back.  
"I'm here! What's wrong?" I cry as I push open the bedroom door and walk to the bathroom where everyone is gathered.  
"Chris help her!" Lynn cries out, tears staining her cheeks as her shaky finger points to Tris. There is vomit in the toilet, and around it on the floor. Tris have vomit in her pulled back hair and on her legs. Her nose is bleeding but not because someone hit it. More like a health reason.  
The towels from the closet were in different places of the room. One was by the bed, probably where Tris threw up first. The next one was being soaked in the sink with warm water and the final one was still folded, sitting on the bath tub edge.  
"Not hot water, cold." I say, flipping the tap onto the different temperature and soaking it entirely with the freezing liquid. "How long has she been vomiting?" I ask quickly, shutting off the tap and raining out the extra water from the towel.  
"She stared 5 minutes before I called you. Maybe 10 minutes straight." Uriah answers. He's never this serious, it's surprising how situations change a person entirely. I nod and fall onto my knees by Tris, avoiding the pool of vomit purposely.  
"Tris I need you to take deep breaths. If you hear me squeeze Will's hand once." Will takes Tris' hand and she squeezes.  
"She hears you." Will says and I nod.  
"Okay deep breaths, just calm yourself down." I say softly and she does, inhaling and exhaling slowly and strongly. "Good, that's a lot better. Uriah water please." I ask him, he hands it to me with a very shaky hand. "Drink a little, not to much now." I ease the glass to her lips and tilt it up so it flows into her mouth. She first spits the first sip of water into the toilet, which Will flushes and then she swallows the second.  
"Okay keep calm, you're alright." I assure her, taking the wet towel I held and wiping her mouth and bloodied nose. The nosebleed continues for a few minutes, Tris leaning over the toilet when the sensation of vomiting grew to strong. After it stopped she coughed heavily, holding the towel to her mouth and then holding it away after she finished the coughing fit. Her eyes grew slightly when she saw the part of the towel she used to cough into. Blood stained it and a little alarm went off in my mind. Having a nosebleed and vomiting is common for pregnant women but coughing up blood isn't.  
"Will, Uriah. Get her to the infirmary. Mar and Lynn, can you guys clean up in here a little?" I ask and they nod. I take the towel from the tub side and soak it under the tap it cold water once again. I bring it to Tris and wrap it around her stomach knowing the cooled feeling will calm the babies from the heat they've just been through.  
"Careful, we don't want her to pass out." I say to Will and Uriah.  
"Got it." They say in unison, picking Tris up together and placing her in Uriah's arms. Will cradled her head on Uriah's left side, holding it in place so she doesn't jostle around.  
"Good, let's go." I say, leading them out the door and back to the infirmary.

It was hours of tests and questions but it came to the conclusion that Tris was stress; her body needs a break but can't have one due to the twins. We put her on different machines, and medications. Her body works less since she's bed written until further notice. Now it's the waiting game, we now watch and see if she shuts down or wakes up inside. It can take weeks, maybe months, but we won't know of that for a while.

* * *

**So Tris is sick. Four beat the shit out of Eric. Oh, and the past initiates are coming back.  
THAT'S EXCITING RIGHT?  
Well, I have nothing to say right now hence the rephrasing of what happened in this chapter. Hope you all had a good weekend. Thanks for the votes and name suggestions. They are truly appreciated :)**

**-Valentina**


	11. Chapter 11- He Fixed Me

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing. All rights to Veronica Roth**.

* * *

Chapter 11

Tris' POV

1 MONTH LATER (5 months pregnant)

"Tris." I'm shaken awake by Will. Groggily I look to him with my eyes only opening halfway. "I'm here to give you this pill, here let me help you up." He slid an arm around my shoulders and helped me to sit up against the headboard. "Alright easy now." He urges, releasing my back and sitting by my side. He placed the pill in my mouth and then brought the glass of water up to my lips, tilting it so it would flow into my mouth.  
"Thank you." I croak after I down the pill and slide back down into the covers.  
"No problem. Lynn will come back in a few hours to give you the next pill and watch over you but for now I'll be right outside if you need anything. Sleep well Tris." He places his hand on my shoulder and squeezes it lightly before rising and heading for the door.  
"Will?" I ask calling to him before he leaves.  
"Yeah?" He turns around and looks at me with the light from the living room streaming in through the crack in the door and creating a line on his face.  
"Did Chris say anything about me walking around? I mean these pills make me sleepy but I want to move around, even if it's only for 5 minutes." Chris was off in Erudite, restocking on some of the medicines they have and sneaking me a few for the babies to keep them alive.  
"She'll be back tomorrow, I'm sure she could tell you then." He says, unsure if it was the right thing to say.  
"Please Will. I'll stay close to the apartment, you can even come with me. Chris won't let me, I have to stay in bed until given permission to move again. I've eaten the food that has been forced upon me, I take those horrid pills that are the size of tennis balls. It's been a month, I'm tired but I need to use my feet!" I demand and he can tell I'm not kidding. He ponders over it, chewing his lower lip and deciding how much shit Chris will give him if I get hurt.  
"Okay, once around the block of apartments, and then back to bed." He says, coming back to my side and helping slide the covers off. I was wearing a black pair of shorts and a dark red tank top that showed off my stomach. When I stood up and moved the feeling was odd. Of course I have had to walk to the bathroom and take a shower at some point, I did that yesterday and felt okay despite having to sit in the tub because standing made me feel dizzy.  
"Here, the heating is down in the compound, it's sort of chili out there." He handed me his dark grey hoodie and I slipped it on gratefully. At the entrance of the apartment I slide on my convers and together, with some help from Will, we walk out the door. It's been a while since being out of that room and the smells hit me like a hurricane of excitement. It smells strong and free and it gives me energy to walk without help, without having to be connected to monitor to hear the babies or to make sure I'm alive as I sleep. It feels good and I haven't felt like this in over a month.  
I'm greeted by people walking by, some I vaguely remember since the drugs kept swiping the least crucial parts of my memory, people's names for instance if I've only talked to them once. However I say hello back and accept a hug or handshake without hesitation because I know these are good people.  
"Hey, you seem strong enough to go a little further. Let's try the cafeteria maybe. I'm sure there is food you'd like." Will suggests and I nod in agreement. The longer we walk the better because the further I get from that apartment I've been stuck in forever, the better I feel. Upon entering the cafeteria I catch a glimpse of someone, it's hard to recognize the person but my stomach turns to stone at the quick flash of remembrance. It's the drugs, they're giving me images I don't want to see but in reality they don't always exist.  
"Look," Will pointed to a table where few people sat, snacking on some of the food still available.  
"Who are those guys?" I ask.  
"Initiates who were let go from dauntless, all 3 years were called back. They're being trained and worked to be dauntless members." Will says, this brings a smile to my face.  
"How? The rules…" I begin but Will laughs.  
"Four wanted to fight for it, he forced Max that Eric was evil and awful and that those people were strong and with a little training could actually be great dauntless members. We got a total of 49 new dauntless members."  
"Why would Tobias do that? He said it wouldn't work."  
"He's been losing his mind over doing things he should've done when you and him were together. It took a lot of work but he did it, no more initiate cuts."  
"I need to talk to him. Alone." I say. "Where would he be now?"  
"It's almost 8pm, he'd probably be in your apartment… his apartment… the apartment."  
"I have to go. Stall Lynn. Say I went for a shower or something." I demand, ready to walk away until Will grabbed the back of the hoodie.  
"No, I promised a walk not a free adventure on your own. What if the medicine makes you sleepy again and no one finds you because you fell asleep somewhere?"  
"I'll be fine. It's for 10 minutes. Please Will. Please!" I plead and he moans in annoyment.  
"Fine." He groans and I thank him immensely before walking to the exit, smiling at Danny on the way out mouthing "See you later" before the doors shut.

~.~.~

Maybe it was sudden, I guess it needs to be discussed eventually but he did it. Tobias got Max to listen and I have to thank him. I knock lightly on the door, yes I did live there, and yes I still have a key and my things in there but I'm not barging in without him coming to me. Strong footsteps make it to the door and then I hear the familiar click of our-his three locks.  
"What-!" He begins to say, snapping at me even though he doesn't know whom it is. "Tris." He says lightly, all his anger flushing from his face.  
"Hi Tobias." I manage through my closed throat. It's awkward, I don't know what to say, he's not saying anything at all.  
"Come in." He says quickly, stepping aside for me and shutting the door with less aggression compared to how he opened it. I smell him, despite our fight the smell still holds that strong love and safety factor and I want to keep breathing this forever.  
"Will told me about the initiates." I say managing a smile.  
"Yeah, it took a lot of convincing and arguing with Eric and Max but they agreed." He hesitates momentarily and then opens his mouth to say something. "I did it for you, I knew you wanted everyone to feel equal and safe. I realized that the first way to be brave is to feel safe and this is going to fix that."  
"Good." I say, my smile falling slightly. "Is that new?" I ask him, pointing to the silver chain tucked into his shirt.  
"No, well yeah. I don't really know." He scoffs to himself. "Here you should sit down." He takes my arm lightly and I feel it. That same spark I felt the first time he touched me, I wouldn't dare let him know that though.  
"How are they? Your babies?" He asks me as we both sit on the couch.  
"They're moving, especially when I sing. They also like Tori's voice." I smile, thinking about Tori taking her shift on watching over me and sitting beside me, telling the twins stories about how I do things as she placed her hand wherever a baby kicked.  
Tobias looks to the floor and I see the instant stream of tears trickle down his cheek. I don't say anything, honestly I don't know what to say at all. Instead I take his hand and place it on my stomach, holding my hand over it as a soft song flows out of my mouth. One of the babies does a light thud against his palm making him laugh between the falling of his tears.  
"I miss you guys." He whispers to my stomach while placing his other hand on the other half of my stomach. "God, I miss the three of you so much." He says, breaking down into a fury of sobs as he places his head on his palm. The babies kick lightly, the sound of crying probably confusing them.  
"Tobias-" I start saying, my own tears falling. Before I say anything more he lifts his head lightly, still watching my stomach. His silver chain falls from his shirt and I see it. My diamond ring hanging there, shinning in the dim light of the living room.  
"You kept it?" I ask him, taking the ring on my palm and looking at it with a smack of guilt.  
"Yeah," He says, sitting up and wiping his cheeks with the back of his hands. "Tris, I'm an awful person who said terrible things that I meant nothing of! I want those babies, I want to be the person they call daddy and hold to when they're scared and share the most exciting things in their lives with. Please Tris, you don't have to forgive me, just let me know that I can be the daddy to them." He pleads and I wouldn't dare hesitate with my words.  
"You're not an awful person. Never ever would I think of you like that."  
"I just really want to know what you think."  
"I think we were both caught up in the moment, angry with each other and pushing our anger into awful directions. See Tobias here's the thing we did wrong: Instead of taking the broken parts of our relationship and gluing them back together we simply brushed them under the rug and avoided each other. I hurt our babies mourning over our fight and now I want to fix it. All of it. I don't want you to hear a different voice singing in the shower every morning. I want to be the first thing you wake up to and the last thing you see before closing your eyes. I want to be the one who presses her nose into your cheek while you make us coffee in the morning. More than anything I want you and I to each hold a baby, to each comfort them and love them and teach them how to be the best we can both be. I want you Tobias." I say lightly, my tears furiously falling at the thought of him saying no.  
"You mean that?" He asks me and I nod. "Do you think you can wear the ring again?" He asks me and once again I nod, my tears flowing at the same rate as his. "Okay." He smiles, reaching behind his neck and unclasping the necklace. The ring slips off the chain, which Tobias places on the coffee table. He stands up and takes my hand, pulling me to my feet next to him.  
"Tris Prior," He begins, dropping to one knee and laughing slightly. "Will you marry me?" He asks and just like the first time, words were unfathomable so all I could do was nod and laugh and cry as he took my shaky hand and put the ring back on.  
"I love you Tobias." I sob, wrapping my arms around his neck and kissing his cheek with delight. He kisses my forehead, then the bridge of my nose, then the tip, and finally he presses his lips to mine. It felt like I have had all my breath taken from me. It was like breathing in a new life. I felt good again and he did that, it was Tobias that could fix me and he did. I was back home wrapped in his secure arms, kissing him for as long as we could, my fingers twirling the collar of his shirt. We broke apart at one point, an urge to kiss more tugging at my stomach but I hold back. Instead I run my fingers through his long hair that hasn't been cut short.  
"Tobias, they're kicking again." I say, laughing at the light thuds. Our kissing seemed to excite them and now they are the doing somersaults in me.  
"Does it hurt?" He asks me with his eyebrows furrowing.  
"No, it just feels weird." I laugh again and curl against his chest.  
"Are you sleepy?" He asks me, stroking my hair back while leaning against the armrest with me practically on top of him.  
"No." I yawn, desperately trying to keep my eyes open.  
"Sleep, it's fine. I'll protect you." He kisses my forehead and I allow my eyes to close, forgetting about the last month and thinking about now.

I knew I forgot something the instant a hand came crashing against the door.  
"What's wrong?" Tobias asks me, sitting up with me still in his arms.  
"Shit." I say softly, standing up on shaky feet and answering the door. Christina stood on the other side, her arms crossed and deep scowl fixed to stay.  
"Tris Prior, what the actual fuck are you doing out of the apartment? You missed a whole night of nutrition pills and God knows what's going on with the babies. I mean look at you, you knees are practically shaking and you're undernourished. We have been searching for you all night!" She barges in and I shut the door allowing her to go on and on.  
"Chris go easy." Tobias pleads, wrapping his arms under mine and easing me to the couch. He too saw my knees quivering from the dizziness.  
"Stay out of this Four, this is practically your fault! You could have called or something while Tris slept."  
"Chris now is not the time." Tobias demands, rubbing my back and holding my wrist as if feeling my heartbeat.  
"When then! The babies could be hurt and Tris knows so much better than to leave without informing someone! She promised Will 10 minutes and lookie here it's 5:30am and has been nearly 10 hours since we started looking. We knocked on your door 35 times and no one answered. Finally I had to take charge and nearly knock down that door until Tris, the person who is shaking like there's a fucking earth quake answered the door-"  
"CHRISTINA!" Tobias barks causing her stop talking. "She's weak, go get her some water and stop screaming at her!" Tobias demands. Chris looks frightened and runs to the kitchen opening a cabinet that contained the glasses.  
"You okay?" He asks me. I want to say yes but now is not the time to lie. Instead I shake my head and breathe heavy breaths. "Alright just take deep breaths, focus on me and nothing else." He suggests and I do, trying to calm myself and ease the shaking.  
"Here." Chris hands Tobias the water and he tilts it into my mouth. I gulp down a little and finally feel the shaking subside.  
"There you go. Much better." Tobias says, handing the glass back to Chris and stroking my ponytail back.  
"I'm sorry." I apologize, my throat opening up after a few minutes and allowing me to say those words.  
"No, don't apologize." He says softly, kissing my cheek lightly and rubbing two fingers over where he kissed. "Just relax," He pulls me close to him, my head falling into his chest.  
"Sorry for not calling Chris. I forgot to tell Tobias and the drugs made me sleepy. Please don't be mad." I beg, Tobias shushing me when I cough at the end.  
"No don't worry. Sorry for freaking out, I was scared that something bad had happened to you." Chris sat by feet, which Tobias eased onto the couch a second ago.  
"I'm fine, honest. I felt okay yesterday at least. Now I'm just dizzy." I say honestly another raspy cough working out of my throat.  
"We should get you to the bed, I'll have Will help me bring the monitors and pills in 10 minutes. Tobias you tuck her in." Chris says and he doesn't hesitate. I'm wrapped up in his arms and lifted to our room, which stays just as neat as the rest of the apartment. He places me on his side while peeling the covers back on mine and then pulling me onto my side with a quick motion. He pulls the covers up to my neck and adjusts my pillow, placing his pillow next to my arms.  
"Tobias stay with me." I ask.  
"Sure." He goes around to his side and crawls right up next to me wrapping his arms around my waist and cradling my stomach. "Are you still sleepy?" He asks me, I nod into his chest as a response. "Okay, rest. When Chris comes I'll make sure they don't wake you."  
"Thanks Tobias." I whisper, the last thing I hear before dozing off is him saying an "I love you."

* * *

**Sorry if the making up was too soon. I understand that most of you wanted a makeup that left them both unsure about their love for a ****while. This was sort of in the moment, but then again a little fight couldn't leave them retreating their lives together for a long while. Besides Tris is still sick, she doesn't have the energy to fight with Tobias any longer especially when he seems to be her greatest medicine. **

**Comment about this chapter if you'd like too :)**

**-Valentina**


	12. Chapter 12- Made to Near Perfection

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing. All rights to Veronica Roth.**

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Chapter 12

**Tobias' POV**

"Be gentle, I promised that we wouldn't wake her." I say to Chris and Lynn as they both try to remove Will's sweatshirt from her.  
"We will, just help us out and maybe we can get this thing off her." Lynn whisper screams at me. I move them both aside and unzip the sweater, sliding it from under her and tossing it on the dresser.  
"There." I say, stepping away so Chris can go back to doing what she was. She began to unwind a monitor, clipping two sliver tabs at the end and then lifting just a little of her shirt to see her abdomen. The tabs were stuck on and then Lynn helped roll Tris' shirt back down while Chris wrapped a Velcro strap around Tris' wrist. It was connected to a monitor that had green numbers. I think it was for her pulse.  
"One last thing, don't worry she always sleeps through it." Chris assures me, taking a syringe and filling it with a clear vial of liquid. She took Tris' untouched but obviously prodded arm and slide the needle in, trying to keep it close to the group of needle scars. Tris flinched slightly but just as Chris promised, she didn't wake up.

"Chris when will she okay again?" I ask as we all sit in the kitchen.  
"I don't know, maybe after the babies are born."  
"Which will be?" I press on.  
"Look her body isn't going to hold out long, naturally it should be for 9 months but she may be looking at the 7-8 month mark for the these two."  
"But she's almost 6 months now, she hardly has a stomach. How on earth are those two babies going to be born in such a tiny form?"  
"I really don't know Four. We'll pray that we can save them but there is only so much you can do about what's going on inside." Chris leans against her bar stool and runs a hand through her hair.  
"Guys, is this us losing hope?" Lynn asks shakily. "Because if it is… We need to be strong for Tris. If we look scared then she will be too."  
"I just wish she was okay again." I say with a puff of heavy air.  
"Trust me, we all do." Chris says picking at the plate of cookies on the counter. A light moan came from our room and I jump.  
"Is she okay?" I ask quickly, standing up straight again.  
"She's fine, they're just nightmares. No one can ever seem to wake her up during one but that's normal. The injection I gave her can do that."  
"I'm going to check on her." I say, walking to the bedroom and opening the door. She turns in her sleep, the wires restricting her movement but still allowing her to move her legs.  
If she's dreaming then words won't pull her out, only touch. Carefully I get on my side, sliding my arms under he hips and pulling her close to my stomach. She trashes a little more and then stops, feeling my hands running up and down her stomach to ease the babies. All at once she relaxes and clamps a hand around mine. Her ring presses against my palm, her breathing lightens and she finally sleeps against me.  
"I'll save you Tris." I say softly, kissing the back of her head. "I will always save you."

**Tris' POV**

I awaken in Tobias' arms, his mouth pressed against my head and hands wrapped around my stomach. As soon as I move slightly he's awaken, pulling back to allow me to flip over. Now we have my stomach between us but he still manages to wrap his arms around my waist, resting both palms on my back.  
"You sleep well?" He asks me, pecking my nose with his lips.  
"Sort of," I admit, shrugging at the thought of my nightmare.  
"Did you have a nightmare?"  
"Yeah." I nod and he holds me tighter.  
"Do you want to talk about it?" He suggests.  
"No, I can't remember it. That injection gives me so many nightmares that they start to become nothing in my mind. I can't remember anything at all."  
"It's okay now right? You don't feel scared anymore?" He asks me.  
"I'm perfect, your arms remind me of safety and waking up in them helps ease the dark images." I say making him laugh.  
"Good." He smirks, pressing his lips on mine and holding the back of my head.  
"How long have we been asleep?" I ask as our lips brisk over each others.  
"Let me check." He says, kissing me quickly once again and then flipping over to look at the digital clock. "4:30pm." He yawns, turning back to me.  
"I should shower, maybe we can go for an early dinner." I suggest, sitting up just a tad to quickly for my hungry, dehydrated body.  
"Woah, slow down." Tobias says obviously seeing my wobbly torso. "Let me help you." He says softly, lifting my shirt to remove the tabs and then unwrapping my velcro wrist strap. He gets up and walks to the machines, shutting each off as though he has done it a thousand times. "Alright slowly now." He says, taking both of my hands and easing me to my feet. He strips me of my shirt and shorts, doing the same with himself. He helps me to the bathroom where he flips on the shower and then removes our under clothes.  
I haven't seen Tobias naked in a long time; his body is still chiseled and made to near perfection. His sides still have red burn marks from when his father hit him as a child and there is a light mark where he once had stitches on his upper arm because he and Zeke went a little crazy by the pit. But I love his imperfections, every part that seems unnatural makes him even more beautiful and here I stand, looking at this Godly figure while I'm naked and pale and rather underweight except for my 5-month stomach. Self-consciously I wrap my arms over my stomach but Tobias pushes them back to my sides.  
"I like you like this." He says, leaning forward and kissing my 4 birds that lead to my heart. His is the closest to the destination as it represents Tobias' undying love. "Every part of you." He mumbles, kneeling down and kissing my stomach twice. Once for each baby.  
"Now let's shower, then we can get you some food." He pulls me under the warm rain, shutting the glass door behind me but leaving a crack.  
Tobias refuses to let me do anything; he thinks that even shampooing my hair will cause me to pass out. I allow him though; turning around so he can run his hands through my hair and lather it with the flower scented shampoo. He then helps rinse it out and then applies conditioner, brushing my wet hair under the water with a comb. He quickly washes out his hair using nice scented shampoo. I hand him the sponge, which he lathers in soap and then helps washes my body. He runs the sponge over my stomach for a lingering moment, smiling when one of the babies kicked.  
"That's your daddy." I whisper softly, receiving another kick. Tobias laughs at this and then proceeds with showering, shutting the warm water after we are both soap free.  
"Here." He says, handing me a big fluffy towel.  
"Thank you." I say, wrapping it around my already shivering body and securing it on my chest. Tobias hangs his towel around his hips and then helps me from the bathroom, holding my hand securely and holding my back with tentative fingers.  
"What do you want to wear?" He asks me, wrapping the third towel he was carrying around my shoulders.  
"Anything's fine." I say giving a quick shake from the cold. How'd it get so cold anyways?  
Tobias heads the dresser where he slides on a pair of his boxers, jeans, and then a black long sleeves.  
"The heating is messed up in the compound and it's winter out there. We need to keep you warm." He insists beginning to dry my hair with his towel. Once I was nearly dry he helped slip on my underwear and then clipped the back of my bra for me. "These seem warm enough." He says out loud as he rummaged through a sock drawer. When he returns to me there is a pair of his black sweat pants hanging on his shoulder and a dark red long sleeve like his on his arm. He drops all the clothing and slides the warm socks onto my feet, they're a tad big but I think that's why he intended to grab his socks and not mine. I get the sweat pants and shirt on finally shedding of the towels.  
"Okay stay here for a minute. I'm going to go and throw these in the dryer quickly." He heads out of the bedroom, returning not a minute later with my hairbrush at hand. He sits beside me and then pulls me onto his lap where he lightly brushes out my wet hair.  
"Do you want a ponytail?" He asks when all the knots have been brushed through.  
"Yes please." I say lightly, beginning to feel his hands drag my hair back into a ponytail.  
"All good." He announces, snapping the black hair with its last ability and then standing up. "We should head out for dinner. Our friends might be there by now."  
"Okay," I agree smiling up at him and taking his offered hand. We walk to the door and somehow, over my extra thick sock layer, I mange to squeeze of a pair of warm boots.

We walk to the cafeteria hand in hand, his pace working with mine despite being slow. Eventually we get to the giant doors and he pushes them open, allowing me to walk in first. Our table is where it usually is, our friends eating their dinner and laughing about something while Uriah pouts.  
"Hey look who it is." Shauna announces, pointing to Tobias and I. She stands up and hugs me, walking back to the table with an arm around my waist.  
"I'll go get you some food. What would you like?" Tobias asks once I'm seated.  
"Anything, I'll just make you eat the rest." I laugh at the thought and as he kisses my cheek, leaving my side and heading for the dinner line up.  
"How are feeling?" Chris asks me, her spoon hanging mid-air in her limp wrist, allowing the lentil soup drip from it.  
"I feel better, well not better but stronger. Tobias does that, he pushes me back up."  
"We're glad that you two made up." Lynn says with a large smile.  
"He helps you, it's evident to everyone." Marlene pipes up making me nod in absolute agreement.  
"What happened to your wrist?" I ask Marlene, only now realizing the excessive cast that was covering it.  
"Oh, Uriah sucks in bed!" She says at Uriah who leans away.  
"Sorry if your wrists are weak, I wouldn't have pressed on it so hard if I'd had known. Besides, you're the one that kicked my in the groin when it happened."  
"Ah correction!" Marlene snaps back. "You had both hands over my head and then, while making out, you pressed to hard. I heard a snap the pain was unbearable! I had to kick you in the groin as reaction." She says making him shake his head angrily.  
"Whatever Mar. If you'd like to complain about me in bed go ahead!" Uriah rolled his eyes and turned his shoulder away slightly.  
"Sure be mad at me, I'm the one who brought this upon us." Marlene laughs, running her fingers though Uriah's thick hair and kissing his neck.  
"You know I never truly minded PDA, but seeing my brother…" Zeke gagged and went back to eating his food while everyone laughed.  
It felt good, all of this. My friends finally back as one, my Tobias sitting with an arm around me and a sudden warmth building up in my stomach that is easing my babies. It all felt beautiful and I want it to stay.

* * *

**Late update. I'm so sorry! I really don't have a proper excuse except for the fact I was lazy and kept putting off the writing of the story. Well is it any good? I hope you guys are liking it :)**

**Comment something, ANYTHING, I love to read what you guys think :)**

**-Valentina **


	13. Chapter 13- Are You Scared?

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing. All rights to Veronica Roth.**

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Chapter 13

(7 ½ months)

"What if they are both boys?" I ask Tobias as we each hold a bucket of paint and eye the wall in front of us.  
"Then they will hate us forever." He jokes. "What's so bad with setting the two extra rooms up for two girls and two boys? You know if ones a girl she will sleep in the other room, if ones a boy he will here in a blue room."  
"Tobias we can't separate them!" I demand. "Besides, it would be easier on me if they were together, then I can feed them without having to leave my new chair." I add, both of us looking to grey recliner with white trim.  
"Still don't know how Zeke and Shauna fit that through the door." I nod in agreement before we both go back to eyeing the wall.  
"Green?" He asks.  
"It's like amity… I don't think it would work."  
"So? Blue is Erudite but we can still use it for a boy?" He asks.  
"It's a classic, blue for boys, pink for girls. Green is when you don't know." I say.  
"But we don't know so…"  
"So we can at least do something else." I supply making Tobias snicker.  
"How about a light grey?" He suggests, my head turning to look at him finally.  
"Abnegation?" I ask.  
"It's where you and I came from isn't it? Besides, it will be mellow, and the cribs will be nice against it since they are white."  
"Okay." I smile. "Grey it is then."  
"Good, now that that's decided lets get you to relax and I'll call over Zeke and Shauna."  
"But Tobias…" I moan reluctantly as he walks me by my shoulders to the couch.  
"No buts, you need to relax and I'm not having you around any of that toxic stuff." He demands, sitting me down and reaching for the phone. He dials a number while I sit and pout up to him with my arms crossed. 'I love you' He mouths to me making me scowl. I give him the finger and he laughs, pressing it back down so I'm making a fist.  
"Hey Zeke, do you and Shauna mind getting Will, Chris, Uriah, Lynn, and Marlene over here? We need extra hands to paint and Tris is so bored with me that she needs some girl friends to keep her entertained."  
"I'm not bored!" I say loud enough for Zeke to hear. "You're just not letting me help at all!"  
"Great thanks man. See you later." Tobias hangs up and places the phone back on the coffee table. "I would let you help but the fumes are strong. I'm just looking out for you." He places both of his arms on either side of me so that he is pressing up on the couch.  
"Okay, sorry." I say cupping his cheek and kissing him. He leans forward so my head is tilted back and he is nearly pressed against me. I hold both sides of his face now, deepening our kiss and flattening further back on the couch. Our breathing heathens and I can feel his warm breath surrounding my mouth.  
"We should." He breaths, not even finishing the statement.  
"Few more minutes." I manage to say, breathing heavily into his mouth. I was taken by his mouth, being kept alive by every breath we began to share, but most importantly I was lost in time. God how I wish it lasted longer. I wish Tobias hadn't called Zeke, we would have lasted like this longer, enjoying each other's lips, holding each other closely and making use of what appreciation we have of each other's bodies.  
"Cut the make out session already. She's pregnant, there's no going any further than that!" Shauna teases, Tobias and I stopping and looking to our group of friends.  
"Well this is awkward." Tobias says, pushing up and fixing his freshly cut hair.  
"Hi guys." I say sheepishly, my cheeks burning up as everyone laughs.  
"That is what I call being hormonal." Chris jokes, sitting beside me and placing her hand on my stomach. "And how are my little hiccups?"  
"Fine." I say smiling.  
"Again why do all of you insist on calling them hiccups?" Tobias asks, subduing a laugh.  
"Because of the ultra sound 2 weeks ago when they were having hiccups at the same time." Lynn says, sitting beside Chris and kicking her feet up on the coffee table.  
"Okay, but when they are born why not try their real names?" Tobias suggests, walking towards the nursery and pushing Lynn's feet down along the way. She scowls at him but crosses her legs instead.  
"So what should we do?" Shauna asks me, sitting on the single and relaxing against it.  
"Tobias and I still need to buy sheets for the cribs. We can go buy them now." I suggest.  
"What colour is the nursery going to be?" Lynn asks, leaning forward to look at me at me past Chris.  
"Light grey, just to bring in a little of the past while decorating it."  
"Classic Stiff." Chris jokes, standing up and offering me a hand. "Common, the boys will be busy for a good 3 hours."  
"Alright just let me tell Tobias." I walk to the nursery and peak in to find the guys fighting over paintbrushes.  
"Tobias?" I manage to call over the loud conversation.  
"Yeah?" He asks, walking to me and holding my side.  
"The girls and I are going to buy the crib sheets. We shouldn't be to long though. I love you." I kiss him warmly and then walk back to the girls. "All set." I announce as Chris takes my arm and practically drags me to the baby store.

"What colour are the cribs?" Marlene asks, sorting through a pile of yellow sheets.  
"White and Tobias said he'd invite Jamie to paint something nice on the walls."  
"Jamie the initiate?" Lynn asks me.  
"Yeah. She's really sweet if you get to know her and she is a great artist. My next tattoo is going to be a design that she made."  
"Who did the ones that you and Tobias got on your wrists?" Lynn points to my left wrist.  
"Tori did. Tobias and I wanted to get each others roman numerals tattooed on our left wrists."  
"That's nice." Chris smiles, looking at me with a mischievous smirk.  
"Really or sarcastically?"  
"Really Tris. I think it's a sweet idea." Chris assures me, going back to the group of blankets set on a table.  
"Now I think this would be a nice match." Shauna says lifting up a white cover for the mattress and then a vibrant blue.  
"They're beautiful." I smile, taking them from her and admiring the colours. "Is there a second set?"  
"Found one!" Marlene announced, handing me the second sheet and cover.  
"Perfect. Let's go and buy these." I say with a large smile walking to the counter.  
"These two please."  
"Alright, that will be 20 points." She smiles, typing something on the computer. "Which name should I take it from?"  
"Tris Prior."  
"Alright Tris, type in your password on this keypad." She says handing me a clear pad with numbers and four available black boxes. I type in my four numbers, white dots fitting into the black dots. "Perfect, so that's 20 from you 1078."  
"Thanks." I smile once more, taking the sheets that we packaged and walking to my friends. "All good, let's head back." I say, my hand absently falling to my side and lifting to my back where a burning pinch hit my side.  
"Here let me take those." Marlene offers, taking the brown paper wrapped packages.  
"Thanks." I say attempting to cover my discomfort.  
"Okay?" Lynn asks as her hand falls on the small of my back. Well I'm busted.  
"Yeah they just have the hiccups again." I say, that's partly true. The other part is that they're beating up each other and getting my side in the process.  
"Let's head home. Four needs to see these." Marlene finally says after everyone gives me a doubtful glare.  
"Good idea." Chris says, still eyeing my stomach but walking ahead.

The nursery was completed after 6 hours of fighting between the guys and the girls and I trying to dress the mattresses, which by the way is harder then perceived. Jamie finally came by after she finished her shift at the tattoo parlour and got the boys under her order, demanding the walls to be painted so she could get the design going. I showed her the sheets as requested and then she got to work, taking the wall as a giant canvas and painting away for a solid 2 hours.  
It was a true masterpiece, simple yet mesmerizing. There were simple trees with blue birds either flying or sitting on the branches. The wall was stripped with different grey and a stripe of a matching blue that are the covers.  
"Jamie it's beautiful!" I announce my eyes taking in the simple beauty which had enough colour to entertain the babies.  
"Thank you all so much!" I say to everyone, wrapping my arm around the side of Tobias. He slung his arm over my shoulder and kissed the top of my head.  
"Only the best for the little hiccups." Uriah laughs, sitting in the recliner.  
"Great now Uriah's ass is going to be imprinted on the seat." Shauna says in annoyed astonishment.  
"Common Zeke, we should be heading home." Shauna urges, taking Zeke's arm and hugging me one last time. Everyone leaves after that leaving Tobias and I standing in the nursery.  
"C'mere." Tobias whispers, pulling my hand towards the recliner and sitting down, pulling me to sit on his lap. "I've been meaning to ask you something. Something we have avoided but should really you know open up about."  
"And that would be?" I ask, twisting one of his light curls at the end of his neck.  
"Are you okay?" He finally asks after thinking over the question.  
"Okay?" I ask as confusion writes over my face.  
"With this, the babies." He runs a hand over my stomach and keeps it there, the babies calming down near that spot.  
"Well we can't really undo anything." I say absently.  
"I know but are you scared?"At this question I feel my defences crumble. All of these walls I've built around this everlasting fear has come crashing down and I know I'm going to cry.  
"I'm terrified." I whisper as my eyes well up with tears.  
"I don't want to make you cry Tris, I never ever want to make any of this scarier then it already is. I just want to make sure that whatever fear grabs you I can somehow help you fight it off."  
"I'm just scared that it's going to hurt. I can handle pain it's just every so often someone tells me that it's something you never forget and I'm not ready for that."  
"That's okay, now all I need you to tell me is how I can help."  
"I don't know Tobias," I choke out, rubbing my face into his shoulder.  
"Well why don't I just promise you something?" He suggests, running his fingers through my light ponytail. I make a muffled sound to tell him I was listening.  
"I promise you that I will hold your hand, I will do ANYTHING you ask but most importantly I will not lie to you. I won't say that I understand and that it could be worse. I will just be there for you, holding you when it hurts too much and doing everything in my ability to make you comfortable."  
"Promise?" I ask shakily, looking up to him.  
"I promise with every fiber of my being." He says as his thumb glides under my eye.  
"Thank you Tobias." I whisper, kissing him for a wonderful moment.

* * *

**To fluffy? No enough Fluff?**

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**-Valentina**


	14. Chapter 14- Two Thumping Heartbeats

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing. All rights to Veronica Roth. **

* * *

Chapter 14

I was 8 months… almost. Just a week away. My strength returned a few weeks ago and Chris was nearly certain that I would make it to at least 8 and half months. I began to believe it until I felt it.  
A warm flow, so warm I thought it was burning my thighs as I lay in bed with Tobias holding my hand. He turned during the night, separating his body from mine but still kept a hold to me.  
I didn't want to move, what if my moving hurt the babies? Instead I squeeze Tobias' hand.  
"Tobias wake up!" I demand quietly, my voice pleading for him to do something since I'm too scared to. "Tobias please!"  
"What?" He asks slowly, opening his eyes and seeing my tear filled ones. "Tris what's wrong?" He asks, releasing my hand and wiping my tears.  
"The babies, I think they are coming. I don't know!"  
"Okay, okay just calm down! We'll get you to Chris." Tobias sits up and turns on the lamp to look at me.  
"Chris won't deliver the babies. I'm scared, it burns. What do I do?" I sob.  
"Just relax. We can get you to the infirmary, come on I'll carry you." He urges, flipping my sheets off and tucking his arms under my legs and behind my shoulders. I'm lifted only to have Tobias make a sound that is between shock and absolute despair.  
"What? What's wrong?" I ask him.  
"Tris that wasn't your water." He says in a tight voice. I look to where I laid and feel my whole body go rigid. Blood drenched my sheets and when I look to my shorts they are darkened by the burning substance.  
"No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no! You have to take me to Chris, maybe she can save them!" I sob loudly, shaking Tobias's arm slightly. "THIS CAN'T HAPPEN!" I scream loudly as my body trembles in his arms.  
"I'll get you to Chris." He says in a monotone voice, obviously too shocked and frightened to bring anything out of his tone.  
The whole way I sobbed, clinging to Tobias as the blood burnt my thighs. It was my fault, every last bit of this was my fault.  
I put that alcohol in my body the night the twins were conceived.  
I was too drunk to ask Tobias about protection.  
I got mad at him the one night he wanted to be free for a few hours.  
I refused to eat for days after our fight.  
I didn't give my babies what they needed because I was sad.  
This is all my fault… I killed someone who wasn't even alive.  
"Joshua call Chris! Tell her Tris is bleeding. get as many doctors over here! PLEASE SAVE MY BABIES!" Tobias screams to Joshua, a secretary that works the late night shifts. As if on cue he pressed a button and doctors came through the door, he dialled something on the infirmary phone and then helped with getting me ona bed.  
"Okay we've got heavy blood lose, losing of consciousness, we need immediate checking over her babies, blood transfusions. Let's move people come on!" One of the doctors instruct, holding back Tobias who held to my hand for dear life. I continued to sob even when a man in blue scrubs pulled my eyelids opened to see my eyes.  
"Tris squeeze Dr. Hartman's hand if you hear me." The same man asked and I did as commanded, squeezing the hand that has been slipped in mine.  
"Okay good, let's get her into immediate surgery we must stop the bleeding."  
"Where is Dr. Draho?" One of the doctors screams to Joshua.  
"I called her, she'll be here soon." He said back as another set of doors opened and then I'm ushered into a small surgery room.  
"Okay Tris I'm going to give you some pain medication something to numb your lower half but we can't put you under." Dr. Hartman said as he took my arm.  
"No, it hurts. I want Tobias!" I plead, sobbing as a syringe is pushed into my left arm.  
"He can't be in here right now, you're friend Chris will be here shortly to help though okay?"  
"No, please I want him. I'm scared, I need Tobias." I continue to sob, Dr. Hartman smoothing back my hair and saying that it will be okay. He goes to where they are preparing my blood transfusion.  
"I'm here, what's the damage?" Chris says, entering swiftly with black a black doctors coat and clean gloves.  
"Heavy bleeding caused from abdominal pressure, possible miscarriage, we might still be able to save one of the babies." Chris looks to me with eyes full of sadness. Had she been here as support she would have cried with me but she has a doctor's mindset so instead she gives me a look of apology and then went straight for the ultrasound machine.  
"Okay lets get the blood and IV going, someone check if she is in early labour." Chris commanded, sitting beside me and taking my hand.  
"Chris you have to save them." I choke out, her eyes welling up with tears like mine.  
"I'm going to see what's going on okay?" She asks, her own voice constricted as she flips on the machine and releases my hand. She lifts my shirt to show my belly and applies the blue gel on my abdomen. I force myself to keep my eyes open despite the blood lose pushing me under.

_Stay awake! _I keep thinking. _Your babies are dead, and it's your fault! Sleep will ease the pain. _My other voice persisted. _Stay awake for them. The children that you so desperately need to hope are alive. _

Just as my eyes shut Chris pressed the monitor on the gel spreading it around until the sound of two heartbeats thumped through the room.

* * *

**It's really short, so is chapter 15, so I'm posting both now. 15 will be up in a few minutes, I can promise you that.  
Again thank you all for your lovely comments, they are cherished and used as ****encouragement when I write.  
So this coming up friday I will be heading off to Portland with my family as a pre-birhtday celebration. I will try to update as well as possible but I'm unsure if I'm allowed to bring my laptop :(  
My birthday is next monday though so that means three things:  
1) DAUNTLESS BIRTHDAY CAKE  
2) Fandom merchandise as birthday presents  
3) NEW BOOKS  
Alright Chapter 15 will be coming your way in less than 10 minutes :)**

**-Valentina **


	15. Chapter 15- The Nameless Ones

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing. All rights to Veronica Roth.**

* * *

Chapter 15

"Why isn't she awake?" Tobias' voice filled my head.  
"Her body is tired, she lost a lot of blood. I won't be surprised if she slept through all of tomorrow as well." Chris answered, her chair skidding on the floor as though she was standing up.  
"Come on, we haven't had any food all day. You've been up since 2am. Let's go get some food for a few minutes."  
"I can't leave her." He insists.  
"She won't go anywhere, I promise. You need to take care of yourself Four, let's go." She commands and then another chair is pushed back. 4 feet exit the room and I'm alone. The only sounds accompanying me is my heart monitor making a consistent _beep, beep, beep _and a light murmured sound of the ultrasound echoing not one but two heart beats. They're alive, my little angels are still inside me and have they're same light heartbeats.  
I open my eyes slowly, the same dim light I like keeping the room with a lesser hospital feel. My body aches slightly as I push myself up to sitting position and look around myself. Just as suspected I was hooked up to various machines and could slowly feel the pain in my bottom half increase. My abdomen clenched and I could feel every pain in my stomach hold me in place as I groaned. If breathed through it, the contraction lasting for only a few seconds. When it passed I reached for my folder, which sat on my nightstand. I flipped it open and skimmed the information.  
"blood lose, suspected miscarriage." I read under my breath. "triplets…" I finally come across the word. "third undeveloped fetus, 1 pound 2 ounces, possible male/ gender probably unknown. Birth: March 27th 2:47am/ Death: March 27th 2:48am"  
I had three babies? Three little people who Tobias and I made. But one of them is dead, I killed one of them... My little boy, he didn't make it. It's all of my fault.  
Everything I do from there I watch from outside my body. I force all myself to leave that retched body that has cost the life of an unborn child. He breathed for a single minute and then his little lungs gave up. He was in pain for that single minute.

My body rises from the bed. _I can't feel anything anymore_. I reach for the medical scissors laying on the counter. _I need to get away from this person I once knew. _I walk to the bathroom and stand in front of the mirror , which my shoulders hardly show past. _Something needs to change, anything, just lose this person who killed your baby. _My hands run through my straight blonde hair. _Cut it. _I take the first strand closest to my face and snip the hair, leaving it just a little above my shoulders. _Perfect, more, it all has to go! _The next strand, it doesn't have to look good, just cut. _You don't know this Tris, she never existed._

_This Tris is gone forever, you must reposes her as a none murder. As someone who never harmed her babies. _

The rest of my blonde hair hits the tile floor of the infirmary bathroom. I place the scissors on the sink edge and look at my hair. It's a short as Chris' now, cut poorly due to the medical scissors lack of ability to cut through hair. My eyes well up with tears and fall slowly. I just keep looking at myself, at this new body I have repossessed. I don't want to remember what I have done but it haunts me like the ghost I was while watching this hair cutting unveil.  
"Tris?" Tobias' voice comes into my mind again, his footsteps leading to where I stood. He doesn't speak when he sees me. He just stands there and watches as my tears fall from my cheeks and land on my shirt.  
"I killed him Tobias, I killed our son." I whisper finally, breaking our everlasting silence.  
"No you didn't." He says in a whisper as his arms fall over my shoulders and hug me into him.  
"Yes I did." I say with anger and sadness leaking from each word.  
"He wasn't going to make it, he was an undeveloped fetus that was months behind the other two. He wouldn't be alive whether you gave birth at 9 months or not." He tries to convince me but I shake my head.  
"What about the other two? I'm in early labour. What will happen to them now that they are less than 8 months and probably going to be born by tomorrow night?"  
"They made it through those scary months while you were sick. What makes you think they can't do it now?" He asks me, I shrug as a response. I don't know what else to say, words aren't even fathomable at this point.  
"Look at my hair." I finally laugh through the tears. "God I must look so stupid to you."  
"You look beautiful, long or short hair." He says, running four fingers through my short hair.  
"That's a lie." I insist, turning around to see his face.  
"Why would I lie to you?" He asks me as his lips connect with mine. "If we have a little girl, I want her to grow up exactly like you."  
"Why?" I ask.  
"Because you are brave, and loving, and one of the most amazing friends any girl, guy or fiancé could ask for." He says kissing me again.  
"I can't wait for the day that I can be called Mrs. Eaton."  
"It will be soon, I promise. Let's just get these little hiccups healthy and happy and then we can plan our weeding."  
"Did you just call our babies hiccups Tobias?" I ask him, a smirk working onto my lips.  
"That's what everyone calls them right?"  
"Of course. Our little hiccups will be amazing people despite having no names."  
"The nameless ones." Tobias jokes, making me laugh.

* * *

**So here it is, chapter 15! If you're confused with what is going on, please go back and read 14. You might have missed it because I posted both 14 and 15 today to compensate for their short lengths. So here is a fun fact:**

**Ever question my nickname choices for the babies? You know Hiccups and The Nameless Ones? Well here are the reasons:**

**THE NAMELESS ONES: When my little sister was born my parents didn't know what to name her. She was even a late baby! My parents were lazy though so for the first two weeks after she was born we would joke around and call her "The Nameless One"**

**HICCUPS: When I was a baby I would get aggressive hiccups every other day and everyone I've ever known has called me a hiccup up to when I was 5 and the hiccups died down. It sometimes comes up when I get the hiccups but I'm hardly called that anymore.  
I also had the hiccups while choosing the nicknames...**

**Okay go ahead and comment something nice :)**

**-Valentina a.k.a Hiccup **


	16. Chapter 16- A Mountain and Meadow

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing. All rights to Veronica Roth.**

* * *

Chapter 16

"Tobias." I whimper as I clutch his hand with such force that my knuckles turn white.  
"I'm right here Tris, shh. I'm right beside you." He calms me, running his fingers through my hair over and over. The pain persists for nearly 2 minutes until it finally starts to release my weak body. "Do you want some water?" Tobias asks me after I've relaxed and breathed my exhaustion loudly.  
"Yes please." I say with a tight voice. Tobias reached for the pitcher and glass by my bed returning to me with half a glass of water. I took a few gulps and then went back to my whimpering.  
It hurt, all if it! These babies aren't willing to come into this world without a large appearance.  
"Good news Tris, you are 8 centimetres dilated. The first baby needs to get you to 10 and then we can start pushing. You're doing wonderfully, just keep it up a little longer." Dr. Quin rubbed my ankle quickly, gave me a smile, and then left the room.  
"See, you're almost there." Tobias smiles, my smile hardly convincing him that I'm trying. "Do you want to try walking again? That really moved things along before." He suggested.  
"Sure, slowly though. Everything burns right now." I tell him. He agrees and eases me up to my feet, pulling my hands up and around his neck so we are facing each other. He steps backwards and I follow, our steps recanting the ones of a toddler learning how to walk for the first time.  
It doesn't take long for the next contraction to hit and for me to freeze, my head falling on Tobias' chest and body locking so it's only him holding me up.  
"Shh, just breathe through it. You're doing so good." His hand begins rubbing my lower back and even though the pain is still there I find it calming and have the need for him to continue. "Does this help?" He asks into my hair as a moan of pain escapes me. I am physically unable to answer so I just nod into him and his hand continues the same motion.  
"You know you shouldn't hold in any pain. It'll only make it worse if you try to stay quiet. Besides it's not like we're going to judge you." Chris walks away before I can reply and I moan louder, releasing every bit of pain. Finally the pain slides and Tobias pulls me forward once again.  
The sounds that find a way from my throat consist of moaning, groaning, and humming. It's almost like I'm singing under my breath and all anyone can hear is my tune but no words.  
"I don't want to do this." I whisper to Tobias as I clutch to him for dear life.  
"You're so close, you can't give up now. The Tris I know wouldn't give up, not when she is so close to holding her precious little angels." He says close to my ear, rocking us lightly as I moan.  
"It hurts though." I sob into his shirt. He doesn't respond, he only rubs my back a little more and then proceeds with the walking because my contraction passed. I'm glad he kept to his promise of not lying. He could've said something like "I know it does." But he doesn't know how it feels so he's sticking to what he vowed and is just trying to ease me through this labour.

How long have I been at it anyways? 14 hours? 16? I remember Chris said something along those lines but between this strenuous pain and constant urge to get rid of what's inside me, I have forgotten.  
"Tris, we'd like to check you once more." Dr. Quin says, entering the room in some scrubs with Chris following him in an identical outfit.  
"I thought you said you couldn't deliver babies." I said to Chris as Tobias led me to the bed.  
"I can't deliver them yet but Dr. Pomel and I will each be taking a baby after they are born for cleaning and check ups. For now I'm support." She says, winking with a smirk and coming to my other side.

"Alright we have hit 9 centimeters. Tris, you will be hitting the final stage of birthing in a few moments. This is called transition. It is painful, and feels like a contraction that goes on for 10 or more minutes. This is basically going from 9 centimeters to 10 centimeters. Just breathe through it, try not to push and then we can get those babies out. 17 hours of labour is a lot, I'm very proud of how well you are doing." He concludes with a toothy grin and stands up again, walking over to the small corner set up with two exam tables with bright lights over head. Chris follows and they begin to make the metal tables comfy. They add towels and 4 different sides so the babies won't fall. Different machines are started up and a new doctor walks in, I'm guessing she is Dr. Pomel.  
"Hello Tris, I am Dr. Pomel. I will be assisting Dr. Draho with the care of your little babies." She gives me a sweet grin, which I attempt to return before a sudden pain hits me.

Transition sucks!  
"Tobias!" I cry out in agony, gripping his arm and crying into his shoulder.  
"I've got you." He eases, running his hand over my hair like before and trying to think of something to do. "Tris, sweetie I don't know what to do. How can I help you?" He pleads as I cry louder.  
"Tell me a story!" I finally cry out with the knowledge that stories can take you away from any situation.  
"Okay umm… I know." He declares, smiling quickly and then starting.  
"Theres a mountain, it's far away from here. Past the gate and the meadows and the oceans that surround us. Sometimes, if you're lucky, you can see it, just the peak of the mountain that glistens with snow in the winter and sprouts bright green in the summer. When I was a little boy I would climb to the top of the hub, despite hating the height I would stand there, the sun setting and showing me just a bit of what that mountain is. It's glorious, it's extraordinary. Just like the meadow, I think of you when I look back to that mountain. I think about how subtle, and hidden you are, thinking that no one should look at you. But I think everyone should look at you, everyone should see the person whose eyes aren't just icy blue but have grey tints in them. Who's hair doesn't just look like a bright sun but feels like silk. They should see the little scar of behind your ear that you got when you were 6 because you, being such a natural dauntless, choose to climb your house. Everyone should look at you and get a feeling of freedom, the same freedom I get when I dream about the meadow or the mountain or even your beautiful face." Tobias finishes, but no one speaks. No one dares to destroy the words that have brought me serenity and peace. Somehow I was taken away from everything, my heart being enveloped by his as he gave this story of beauty and what I am to him. My tears aren't pain, they are happiness.  
I'm happy I chose him and he chose me.  
I'm happy that I get to kiss his lips and twirl his hair.  
I know everything about him and he knows everything about me.  
That's all we ever truly needed to be together, that we loved each other with such a passion everyone could notice it.  
Tobias is mine, but that day on the ferris wheel not 6 months ago has locked my heart to his.  
"That's a good story." I say softly, holding his chin between my fingers and pulling him forward. "That was the greatest story ever told." I say before kissing him.  
"I'm glad you liked it." He laughs, wrapping an arm over my shoulders and placing his other on my stomach.  
"They are going to be our meadow and mountain." He says in a whisper. "Our very own meadow and mountain that no one can ever take away." He promises, kissing me behind my ear and then waiting for the doctor to say something.  
"We'll Tris, it's time to get this going. Let's meet your first baby." He smiles, looking to the clock and then to me. "This is on your own time. Push when you feel like you have to push. Don't over do it though, okay?"  
"Okay." I say, grabbing Tobias' hand and looking to him.  
"Let's do it." He says, kissing my temple and then clutching my hand as I pushed.  
If this is what dying feels like then I'd rather be immortal!  
"Good Tris, take deep breaths now." Dr. Quin recommends. I want to spit back a nasty comment but it seems like even making noise hurts too much. I push again, my knuckles turning white as I grip Tobias' red hand. I would feel bad if he wasn't such a strong guy.  
"I can see the first baby's head. Come on 2 more pushes and then it's out."  
I push again, tears escaping my eyes involuntarily as I groan in a not so pleasant way.  
"Good one more." He urges, his tone bothering me slightly.  
"You're almost there. One more for hiccup number 1. Just for our little angel." Tobias whispers in a softer tone to my ear. Of course he could tell I was bothered by using a mean tone.  
I put all I had into this push, leaning forward just a little more and sobbing loudly when I felt release.  
"It's a boy." Dr. Quin says brightly, holding up a blood dripping baby who was no bigger then half of Tobias' forearm. "Date of Birth: March 29th 5:43pm. Dr. Pomel please take the baby for cleanup." Dr. Pomel does as instructed and takes my baby into her hands, smiling at that wailing baby.  
"Alright Tris, just one more baby." I nod and begin to push, again tears falling without my knowledge and sweat blotting on my forehead and neck. "Good, breathe." He said, Tobias began to dab my head with a wet wash cloth from Chris.  
"I'm sure it's a girl," Tobias whispers. I relax against his arm momentarily and manage to say, "You'd spoil her rotten."  
"Okay Tris I can see the head." I took a deep inhale and pushed, giving it my very little energy and praying that the baby would come quickly.  
"Few more." Dr. Quin pushed, Tobias whispering sweet nothings into my ear as I tried again.

I pushed for another 10 minutes at least until I began sobbing. My body not even willing to try anymore as Tobias held my shoulders.  
"Why won't it come out!?" I cry, pain burning in my bottom half.  
"Please Tris. One more push." Tobias pleads. "Do it for the sake of our meadow."  
I nod, breathing in a sharp breath and then pressing forward.  
It was fast, a sudden release and then a light cheer from Dr. Quin.  
"A girl, a tiny girl." He said with a smile holding her up. I looked for those 7 seconds, her little hands opening and closing as she wiggled in his hands.  
"Dr. Draho." She was handed to Chris who had tears in her eyes.  
"You did so well." Tobias said, his own tears soaking my hair as he kissed me repeatedly.  
"Thank you." I say, grabbing the side of his face and kissing him with my last bit of energy before slipping into a dark slumber.

* * *

**Chapter 16, YAY! So a boy and a girl? Is that to... old? I don't want to be like every other fanfic but with the names I has and future plans for the story I was really wanting it to be one of each.**

**Comment something you want to learn in ****the next chapter :)**

**-Valentina**


	17. Chapter 17- Red and Blond Hair

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing. All rights to Veronica Roth. **

* * *

Chapter 17

When I awoken Tobias was sitting beside me, his arms cradling a small blue bundle with light blonde hair peaking through his hat.  
"Hey." Tobias smiled, noticing I've awoken.  
"Hi." I smile back, looking between Tobias and the baby. His expression is new, something that beams his proud ness over what he made, his own little son.  
"This is our son Tris." Tobias laughed, standing up and allowing me to sit up in bed. It hurt slightly but the pain slid away quickly.  
"He weighs 5 pounds 8 ounces."  
"He's so small." I comment when the bundle was placed into my arms. He scrunched his face slightly from the new arms he encountered, opening his squinty eyes to see me.  
"Hi baby. It's me, it's your mommy." I say, admiring his grey eyes that hardly open. "That's how you open your eyes in the morning." I say to Tobias. "They don't widen until you've showered." I add.  
"You should see our daughter." Tobias says.  
"How is she?" I ask, suddenly realizing she wasn't in the room.  
"Fine, it took a while to get her to cry but she did eventually. Right now she's getting fluid removed from her lungs. It's quick, nothing to fear really."  
"How big is she?" I ask, a smile growing onto my lips.  
"A solid 5 pounds, and she is just about as big as my hand." He holds up his hand, the size bigger then mine but small for a baby  
"I didn't really get a good look at her, she's been in and out for different preemie tests. All are negative so far."  
"That's good. And he's healthy."  
"Healthier then most babies born at this time." Tobias says, looking to the baby. "He needs a name."  
"Yeah, what do you think?" I ask. "I mean you've been with him for a while."  
"Well, there was this one name. It was my favourite fairy tale as a kid about a brave knight who didn't save a princess but instead saved his sister. His name was Damien."  
"Damien? I like that. It suits him." I say smiling at my grey eyed baby. He slowly closed his squinted eyes once again and fell asleep within seconds. "How about Damien James Eaton?" I suggest after kissing his little nose.  
"It's perfect," Tobias says without hesitation, kissing the top of my head and sitting on the bed beside me. We take turns admiring Damien, time dwelling on until Dr. Pomel comes into the room.  
"Oh Tris, it's good to see you have awaken. Your daughter is doing fine, Dr. Draho is just running a blood sample and doing as heart scan so for the time being we should maybe learn how to feed these little ones." My hearts begins to race. Feeding them had never really you know… make an appearance in my thoughts. I knew they needed to be feed but the way it was to happen just didn't occur to me.  
"Don't you worry one bit about it. Babies can either take a few seconds or a few hours to figure it out, there is no control we have over how they take it. All you can do is analyze the way you think they like best. Now Four if you could hold him for a minute, Tris let's get you seated just a little better." Dr. Pomel began to raise the bed slightly stopping it so I was at a 70 degree angle.  
"Okay now this part is not that hard at all." She says, taking the baby and waiting for me to unbutton my gown. "Just hold him, coax him to latch on. If he sucks then he's got it but if he puts it out then try again. Sometimes they just don't know what to do with it." She says with a laugh, placing Damien in my arms and arranging his head close to his food source. I helped him latch on as instructed and waited for his response. He began to suck slowly, and then at a moderate pace, understanding that this is food and that this was the way to get it.  
"Perfect! Okay Four if you could come with me over to that desk. We can get the birth certificate filled out for him and wait for your daughter to do her's." Tobias nodded to her request, sliding his arm from behind me and walking with Dr. Pomel to the desk and writing down something's on a piece of paper.  
I feed Damien for a while longer until he let go and tried to go back to sleep.  
"I think he's done." I speak up, shutting my gown and propping him up a little.  
"Alright, well now daddy gets to help." Dr. Pomel chirps, leading Tobias back to the bed and draping a white cloth over his shoulder. "Support his bum and rub his back. He needs to release any gas that he got while drinking so burping him is the way to go. Forget to do this and they can get colic which is the stomach expanding and creating discomfort." Tobias places Damien over his shoulder and looks rather freaked out as he holds this tiny person. His hand rubs circles over Damien's back and within a minute he smiles, probably hearing the small burp of our son.  
"Perfect, now he might need a diaper change in a few minutes but for now you to can relax until your daughter is done with her testing." Dr. Pomel flutters off and Tobias began to laugh.  
"What's so funny?" I ask him as he tries to find composure.  
"God, she's like an airy character from a fairy tale. It's so humorous!" He says, making me laugh as well.  
"Don't be so mean Tobias." I scold despite my light laughter.  
"Damien looks like you." Tobias recognizes after we both stop laughing. "Your pointed nose, thin lips, blonde hair, even the grey in your eyes matches his. The only thing from me is his squinting eyes from when he wakes up."  
"He has your light amount of hair." I tease, stroking the little hair that covers my son's hair.  
"Funny." Tobias fake laughs making me snicker.  
"I swear this kid acts nothing like you. You're so fussy he's so simple. I have a strong feeling our little girl and Damien are going to be polar opposites."  
"You can count on it, the one thing I could tell was the amount of fussing she was doing while you slept and they checked her over in here."  
"Well that's just great." I say with a laugh.  
"Tris, Tobias." Chris walks into the room, a small pink bundle in her arms. "Guys, this is your little girl and I think she's been waiting for a while to meet you two." She says quietly, trying not to wake the sleeping babies. "Here little girl, lets see your daddy." She suggests, placing her in Tobias' arms and smiling at the image before her.  
"Oh Tris look at her." Tobias says to me, holding the baby close to my sights and allowing me to see Tobias' mirroring image. She has his hooked nose, full bottom lip and spare upper lip. Her hair is thick with light curls and is a deep shade of red.  
"She is most definitely your baby." Chris says, addressing how Tobias and her look-alike.  
"My God Tobias. Damien looks a little like me but this little girl right here is a spitting image of you." I say in astonishment, his smile growing as he stares intently at our daughter.  
"Your turn to pick the name. I chose Damien, you chose her name now." He says, as I begin to ponder.  
"Phoenix." I finally say, a smile edging my lips at how it would fit my daughter. "It's a bird, I remember them from when we were in school. The name sounds really… unique."  
"I love it." Tobias grins, kissing the little girl on her forehead and rocking her back and forth. "Phoenix Emma Eaton." He concludes, choosing her middle name.  
"Our perfect children." I beam, looking at Damien who's chest rises and falls at a slow, easy rate.  
"We'll now's my time to be a doctor." Chris says in a disturbed way.  
"What's wrong?" Tobias asks, his body going rigid.  
"Damien has an undeveloped lung. It's like one of his is perfectly healthy but the other is almost none existent. We can arrange to get the lung out since it is of course with no use but we would have to wait until he was much older to give him a transplant. Having one lung as a baby can be challenging, feeding, sleep patterns, overall ability to gain proper oxygen are amongst that list. Now he won't die, his lung is strong on its own and he can cope but what I'm concerned about is the future procedure. The oldest he must be is 5, we can slowly watch him progress and go from there."  
"If he chose dauntless in the future, would he be able to keep up in initiation?" Tobias asks, all of my words managing to disappear from my tongue."Sure, if he has the energy and natural physic like you and Tris. He can lead a completely normal life, it really depends on the person."  
"When would he have the lung removed?" I finally ask.  
"Soon, we don't want him growing up and having the lung there to create habits. It gives him little air but the more he gets used to it, the harder it will be to deal the transition."  
"Soon as in tomorrow, next week, next month?" I push for more, but my stomach feels like stone and all I want to do is keep my baby from being in pain.  
"Whenever you guys want by the end of April." Chris sits by my feet and sympathizes me with her eyes. "It's scary and it's hard but he's fine, a healthy baby if you ask me."  
"How about Phoenix?" I ask immediately after.  
"Her immune system is weak, she'll be prone to getting colds and the flu. If you keep her under healthy habits, washing hands, eating right, stuff like that then she should be fine but she can get sick and it can get bad. Just take as much care of the two of them as you can."  
"We will guard them with our lives." Tobias promises, Phoenix starting to whimper in his arms. "Now I think this is mommy's job." He says, addressing her hunger.  
"So this can be yours." I say, smelling the stench of my son's diaper.  
"Great." Tobias fake cheers, taking Damien and slipping Phoenix into my arms.  
"They're really beautiful babies Tris." Chris says, looking to where Tobias was in case he needed help. "My hiccups look great." She laughs.  
"Well hopefully the hiccups won't last to long." I laugh with her. Phoenix begins to fuss some more so I get her ready to feed. After fixing my top and getting her on I was just watching her contentedly fill up her hunger. Tobias made a retching sound and Chris went to his side, her noise sounding similar to his.  
"God Tris! Great kid, but disgusting shit." Tobias says as he plugs his nose.  
"See Phoenix that's daddy's job. He gets to do the dirty work while you and I can relax." I tell her, stroking her thick curls.  
I wonder where she got the red from, Tobias has a dark shade of brown while I have blonde it makes no sense.  
"All done?" I ask her when she unlatched and tries to sleep. I close my top and burp her quickly, looking back down at her now open eyes. They were wide, and a dark shade or blue with tints of icy blue like mine.  
"Oh daddy is going to spoil you rotten with a face like that." I joke to her, kissing her forehead and waiting for my little angel to fall asleep.  
"All done?" I ask Tobias as he comes back with Damien who is close to tears.  
"Yup, but he is- oh there it is." Tobias says, Damien screeching loudly and flailing his arms and legs.  
"Give him here." I say lightly, handing Phoenix to Chris and taking a very loud, and red Damien.  
"Hey little man, you making a fuss now?" I ask him as he wails loudly.  
"Uh Tris." Tobias suddenly worries, Phoenix squirming at the sound of her brother crying and beginning to follow in his lead. She starts with whimpers but soon is screaming louder than Damien.  
"Damien shh, mommy's her!" I try urging but he keeps on wailing.  
"Dear Lord." Tobias sighs, rocking Phoenix with desperation to keep her quite.  
"Hey Uncle Zeke has arrived!" Zeke declares loudly while entering the room with a trail of people behind him. "What the hell is going on!?" He cries, clamping his hands over his ears and cringing.  
"They won't stop crying!" I say loud enough for our other friends.  
"Maybe they're still traumatized from their birth. You know squeezing through a small-" Uriah can't even finish his sentence because Marlene smacked him upside the head.  
"Shut up idiot!" She scolds as he rubs the back of his head.  
"Umm guys, still screaming babies over here." Tobias says.  
"Right let me at em'" Shauna says, scooping the small baby from Tobias and into her arms. "Hey, you must be the little sister Chris was talking about." She coos, running a finger over Phoenix's cheeks and kissing her forehead. "There you go, look at that." She laughs, watching as the baby calmed down and nuzzled closely to her arms.  
"I wonder if it worked with me." Uriah smiles, walking to me and reaching for Damien who screeches at the new person trying to reach him.  
"How about no?" Suggests Chris who pushes him back by the shoulders and returns to me.  
"Tris you need to give me Damien so I can make sure he's okay." Chris suggests I hand him over without any hesitation. Chris stands quickly and walks over to the same examination table he laid on less than a day ago. His cries subdue a few minutes later and soon he is returned to Tobias who asks if everything was okay.  
"Just some clogged fluids, nothing a little suction won't fix." She dismisses, running back Damien's blonde hair.  
"So what are their names?" Lynn asks in a voice softer than her original as she runs her finger over Phoenix's hair.  
"Well the boy is Damien, and the girl is Phoenix." I say, my words just showing how proud I am that those are my babies.  
"And Phoenix has red hair?" Lynn smirks, raising an eyebrow at me.  
"Hey I don't know where she got it from, it's a true mystery." I laugh. Tobias slid beside me on the bed so I could play with Damien's tiny toes. They are tiny, not even a full centimeter long. He also has very light skin compared to Phoenix who is darker like Tobias.  
"So what can we do with the little hiccups?" Uriah asks, looking at the babies skeptically.  
"Nothing much, they're babies, they won't be able to really do anything for another few months." Chris says, discouraging Uriah.  
"Hey Mar." I call, receiving her attention immediately. "You live in the C apartments right?" I ask her.  
"Yeah, why do you ask?"  
"Have you seen the initiate Jamie? She's a tattoo artist now."  
"Oh yeah I know her. She lives next to me." She smiles.  
"Great, when all of you guys head back do you mind sending her here? I promised to show her the babies after they were born."  
"Sure thing, but only if I get to hold little Damien." She smirks, her arms stretching out to me as I hand her Damien. "Alright I promise to send her here." Marlene says once the baby is staring at her with intense eyes. Damien was interested in her braid and seemed to enjoy its vibrant ombre tips. Phoenix had opened her eyes and was furrowing her eyebrows at the sight of Lynn whose hair was shoulder length but shaved across the left side and Shauna whose eyebrow was pierced, and nose had a hoop through the center.  
"I think she's scared." Will notes, looking to Phoenix with a laugh.  
"She's dauntless, this is natural." Lynn snaps back.  
"Fair enough." Will responds as he joins Marlene and Damien.  
The room falls into an ominous silence, no one speaks, they just smile. Smiles so bright that you'd believe all could stay the same. That is until a little hiccup echoed in the room.

* * *

**Okay those are the names. Sorry about taking so long with the updating, I went to Portland for the weekend and am knee high in homework since the end of the year (exams) is coming closer. I know, I know. It's still early to start studying for exams but I want to pass!  
**

**-Valentina**


	18. Chapter 18- The Freedom I Love

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing. All rights to Veronica Roth.**

* * *

Chapter 18

The babies came home after a week of staying at the infirmary. We had a set the date of Damien's lung removal for 3 weeks from now, Chris promised it wouldn't be dangerous, and hardly invasive since the lung was so small.

"Phoenix you have so much hair." I whisper to her as my hand ran the light baby shampoo through her red locks.

"Hey, I've got Damien dressed, should we finish up with Phoenix and head off to the cafeteria for some of our own lunch?" He asks at he rubs his hand over Damien's back.

"Sure, why don't you put Damien on his moon shaped pillow and set up a bag with like 2 diapers per baby and 4 bottles." I suggest, removing the plug from the drain and picking up Phoenix who instantly begins to whimper from the cold.

"The bottles are already made right? I just have to place them in a pot of boiling water?" He asks as Phoenix starts crying.

"Yup, just heat up the water on the stove and drop the bottles in. When they are done wrap a cloth over each and put them away in the bag." I instruct, finally placing Phoenix on the changing table and wrapping the pre-laid towel around her body.

"Alright, say bye to mommy. You are going to chill in the living room while I get your food ready." Tobias talks to Damien as he walked out of the room and I proceeded to dress Phoenix.

"You like being warm, don't you?" I ask her as she cuddled into the towel. "I can't believe you already have a cold." I exasperate as I wipe the runny nose Phoenix has had. She made a light coughing noise and continued the gnawing of her knuckles. I wipe her hand away from her mouth and unwrap the towel, quickly wrapping a diaper on her bottom and applying some baby powder. I take the matching black jumper that Damien has and place it over her head, messing up her hair slightly. When I brush her hair out and put on some matching black socks Tobias is walking in and asking if we were ready.

"All done." I announce, handing him Phoenix. He extended his arms out and read the jumper, "Itty Bitty Dauntless." He read out loud, chuckling at the phrase. "Just like Damien."

"Correction, Damien's says Tenie Wenie Dauntless." I say kissing his cheek and leaving the room.

"Hey that wasn't much of a kiss." He says, turning me around and placing his lips on mine despite having a baby between us. I deepen the kiss, holding his collar and helping to support Phoenix who sleeps carelessly.

"Can't stay here forever." I chime, as we break apart.

"Fine," Tobias moans as he takes the diaper bag and heads for the door. I scoop up Damien and follow him.

We walk to the cafeteria, each holding a sleeping baby as they suck on a pacifier.

"I have an idea." Tobias speaks up after we stay in silence for a while.

"What would that idea be?" I ask as I snuggle into his arm.

You'd think I was crazy but instead of lunch let's head for the train tracks, we have the baby carriers in the bag and I've been waiting to show you something for a long time."

"Tobias how on earth are we going to get on and off a train with two babies?" I say, stopping in my tracks to eye him.

"We can do it, we can't be confined to the compound until they learn to do it on their own." He points out, taking my hand back in his and urging me down a different path. "Besides, they need air, real air."

"Okay, let's get them on now, make sure everything works. I'd rather not have a baby, especially ours, die because they fall off of a moving train."

"Fair enough." He says, pulling me off to the side and unzipping the diaper bag with one hand. He hands me a baby carrier and takes one himself, dropping the bag by his feet and starting to maneuver Phoniex into the black holder. I do the same with Damien and finally click the final buckle behind my back, his sleepy eyes looking up to me as though questioning what we were doing.

"You'll be fine." I whisper, pecking his forehead and sliding a black cap over it since we were heading outside.

"All set?" Tobias asks as he slings the diaper bag back on and supports Phoenix slightly.

"Yup. You sure this is safe?" I ask, my eyes flooding with concern and not so wonderful thoughts about the "what ifs?" in this situation.

"I would never put you or our babies in danger, this is something I've seen hundreds of dauntless mother's do. Besides the train stops where were going. All we have to do is jump on." He holds both of my cheeks and kisses me softly on the lips. "Do you trust me?" He asks as our breaths mix and heat my face.

"I trust you." I reply, taking his hand and walking with him to the train tracks. The late spring breeze hit us as we emerged from the compound; the babies suddenly were very intrigued by the new perspective of the colour surrounding them.

The train was heard by the rumbling on the tracks, Tobias looked to me suddenly.

"We only do this if you are willing to jump." He says as his hand tucks a loose strand of my hair behind my ear.

"You and I jump together, remember?" I say, giving him my bravest smile and running ahead as the train came with full speed towards us. Tobias jumped on the back, smacking the button on the side and climbing in.

"This is how things around here work Damien. You just have to be brave." I tell the startled baby. "I'll protect you though." I assure him as I grab the end car and step in. Tobias grabbed my hand and pulled me to him.

"That wasn't so bad." I laugh as I push back my crazy hair.

"Not at all." He agrees, pecking my forehead and pulling us against the wall of the cart.

We sat in silence for a whole 15 minutes, the train running over the tracks and the sound of our children breathing lulling us to an easy mind state.

By the time we came to a stop we were at the gate and a man with a gun and ammo strapped along his chest stood there waiting.

"Tobias." He said we a gleeful grunt.

"Bernard." Tobias smiled giving each other a tight handshake.

"The next load from Amity should be coming through in the next 5 minutes, you two can sneak through then. Remember keep low, stay hidden and have a good time. Also be back in less than 3 hours otherwise I'll go searching for you two and will be forced to report your disappearance." Tobias nodded and thanked Bernard before taking me towards the gate entrance. Just as told, a truck came through the gate allowing Tobias and I to slip out, we ran for a little and then walked, our hands intertwined and bodies only inches apart.

"This right here is our meadow, this is where we will claim the spot that Phoenix will one day run freely and be able to see her brother's mountain miles away." When I looked away from Tobias the scene in front of me was glorious. The soft grass blew high off the ground and tall trees scattered the forest edges. "This is they place you remind me off, this is the freedom that I've loved all along." He whispers, pulling me into the grass, which grazed my legs softly.

"It's extraordinary." I say in utter shock.

"Just like you." Tobias says, kissing my head.

"Our family is extraordinary." I say, taking his face in my hands and kissing him so deeply I felt like it was the first time my lips ever grazed his. When we pulled apart my head turned to look to the distance.

"The mountain that glistened with snow in the winter and blossomed with green in the summer. That is our Damien." I said.

"Our one and only." He clarified sitting in the field and taking Phoenix from her baby carrier. I did the same and laid back. My hair made a small main around my head and Damien slept on my stomach, mimicking the belly I once had there.

"Tobias I want our weeding to be here. I want our closest friends to sneak out with us and watch us exchange rings with one another."

"Me too." He says, taking my hand and grazing his fingers over my diamond ring. "We should do it tomorrow. Zeke could be our justice of the peace and we can invite all of our friends."

"I would love that." Is all I could say before closing my eyes and embracing the feel of the sun on my face and warm grass wrapping around my skin.

* * *

**Such a late post! I apologize, really, I didn't mean to hold off for so long. I've had extreme writers block, most of you should know the feeling. I'm watching Catching Fire because I'm home alone and for once no one is yelling at me for crying because of its beauty.  
****So I might post chapter 19 later tonight and 20 tomorrow but I need to be sure the thoughts are lowing once again. I swear I have thinking constipation! **

**-Valentina **


	19. Chapter 19- We Will Be United As One

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing. All rights to Veronica Roth.**

* * *

Chapter 19

"Tris you don't even have a dress!" Exclaimed Chris who walked with the train of girls behind her and Phoenix in her arms. Tobias was with the other guys buying a tux and things for tomorrow while I was attempting to buy a dress for both Phoenix and I.

"What do you think we're doing here Chris?" I snicker at her, pulling the side of a dress to get a better look at it.

"Well you're doing it wrong!" She puffs in astonishment, handing Phoenix to Shauna and moving me aside from the dresses.

"Are we going for big and puffy or small and simple."

"Simple, it has to be easy enough for me to get on a train and to sneak past the gate."

"Well that really narrows it down to NOTHING!" She snaps back, ruffling the dress and moving to a new rack.

"She's crazy." Lynn mouths. I laugh and follow my persistent friend. No one disturbs Chris while she shops that would just be a death wish.

"Oh this is so cute!" Cried Shauna from the other end of the shop, holding up a white baby dress that seemed a little too big for Phoenix. "Come on Hiccup, your best girlfriend, Shauna is going to give you a whole new look." And with that Shauna whisked away my baby and I went back to watching Chris.

"Nope… nope… nope." She kept whispering under her breath, turning every now and then to eye me. I started to believe she'd forgotten how I look and needed a reminder.

"Here we go." She finally smiled, holding a long white dress that seemed to hug your ribs and flow down your legs in loose silk waves. "This is the one for you Tris." She said in a very sure voice. I took the dress and eyed the look for a moment, then turned and headed off for a changing room where I heard a very chirpy Shauna talking to Phoenix on how to fit in well at Dauntless.

"She doesn't have enough hair to shave off the side Shauna." I say with a laugh, sliding my curtain shut and striping of my black skinny jeans (They fit as soon as the babies were born, who knew!) and red tank top. The dress stayed on its hook, I didn't know if I wanted to put it on. My mind kept telling me that I should wear the one and only dress that is perfect. I don't want to try on a million different ones; I want to try on the one and only dress for me.

"Tris." Lynn calls from outside, I peek past the curtain, covering my body so only my head shows. "You don't like the dress, do you?"

"It's beautiful honest, I just don't want to try on a million different dresses, I want to put on the one and only dress I will wear in front of Tobias tomorrow."

"Thought so. Chris knew that, so she asked me to take that back and to give you this." Lynn handed me a dress with a similar design, flowing fabric and a soft touch. "She said something about it reminding you of Four." Lynn shrugs and walks away with the dress I handed back to her.

I slide the new dress on, the fabric lightly surrounding my body as I fix the top. I turn around to see myself in the mirror my heart stops. I wasn't sure how Chris thought Tobias would come to my mind when I saw the dress but her did. Maybe it was the simplicity, or the gentle touch. It could have also been the strength that surged through the fabric despite not being there at all.

This dress was made for me, it was made for Tobias and I.

"Tris, come on out we want to see it!" Squealed Marlene. I must've lost track of time admiring the dress because when I stepped out all of the girls were wearing knee height black dresses, Phoenix included.

"Dauntless enough for you Stiff?" Chris asks jokingly.

"You guys look amazing." I say with a laugh.

"You look even better! Oh just look at these two." Shauna walks Phoenix to my side and holds her up by my arm. "The perfect mommy and daughter." She concludes, kissing Phoenix's head and then handing her to me.

"Tobias is going to fall in love with you all over again when he sees you." Tori insists, playing the sides of her dress.

"So we buy these dresses and tomorrow the guys all head out to the location first, and we take the second train after them so then Tobias won't get to see you until you two say your vows." Lynn runs through the list, I nod along with all of the steps.

"Who's marrying us?" I ask abruptly.

"Zeke. He's done it before, it's all good." Shauna says.

"Good. Now let's buy these dresses, Phoenix seems to be missing Tobias." I say, addressing the whimpering baby.

"I'll change her!" Shauna declares excitedly, scooping the baby back into her arms and walking into her room before anyone can say otherwise.

"She's in love with that girl." Lynn whispers to me, I nod with a large smile.

"So much." I add when we hear Shauna whisper little jokes to Phoenix.

~.~.~

After we purchased the dresses we stopped by all of the apartments to leave our bags, hidden of course so the guys won't see them.

"I suggest we look for the guys and head off to the cafeteria for dinner." Lynn suggests as I quickly change Phoenix's diaper.

"Sure, just let me finish this little girl off." I say, strapping on a new diaper and clipping her jumper on from underneath. When she was happily sucking a pacifier I gave her to a very eager Shauna and quickly washed my hands.

"Dinner time." I say after turning the bathroom light off.

"Finally." Lynn says in desperation. We head out, and walk to the cafeteria.

"Tris, someone wants their mommy." Shauna says as Phoenix starts to cry.

"Hey baby, mommy's got you." I say in a comforting manner as I holding her close to my neck. "Mommy's here." I whisper as her whimpers subside.

~.~.~

"Well look who finally chose to join us." Zeke announces as we all sit down at our usual spots.

"How're my girls?" Tobias asks, wrapping his arm around my waist and sliding his tray with two plates of food on it to me.

"Where's Damien?" I ask, noticing we're missing a baby."

"Will wanted to try holding him." He answers, nodding to Chris and Will who coo at Damien.

"I missed you." I say, kissing Tobias under the ear. "So much." I add, kissing him on his earlobe.

"I will never leave you again." He assured, turning his face and connecting his lips to mine. I smile between our kiss, making Tobias snicker.

"Here eat, I already had some of my food." He urges the tray a little more and I look at the mashed potatoes and roast beef.

"Thank you." I say, handing him Phoenix and taking my fork. The fact that I've missed lunch and ate only a piece of toast for breakfast I wasn't surprised to feel my stomach rumble.

I begin to fork mashed potatoes into my mouth, hunger taking over everything I know. "Slow down there, you're going to swallow the fork." Tobias laughs, Phoenix sucking his finger intently.

"Sorry, I'm just so hungry." I exasperate, slowing my pace down and trying the roast beef.

~.~.~

That night Tobias and I stood side by side at our bed, each fitting a baby into their footie pajamas.

"Should I feed them once more before we put them in bed?" I ask, picking up Phoenix after buttoning the front of her pajamas.

"Sure, we can go to the living room so I can burp them after." Tobias suggests clipping the final button at the top of Damien.

"Who's hungry?" I ask Phoenix who looked to the fire light with a flicker of excitement. She seems to enjoy things that looked exciting or dangerous, Damien likes airy things with safety intended.

I plop myself next to the armrest, fixing my shirt so I can get Phoenix to eat.

She latches on immediately, her hand resting by my collarbone like always. When feeding she enjoys keeping her eyes closed the sensation probably lulling her to sleep.

Her hair messily sticks up in crazy curls. I love its vibrant colour, and the way that it is just like Tobias' when he grows it longer than usual. I can brush through it a thousand times and it will still stay messy.

"Is she asleep?" Tobias asked.

"No, just pretending" I say, laughing slightly.

We sit for a while longer, Phoenix falling asleep slowly and then releasing.

"Here she needs to be burped." I say, placing her in his free arm and taking Damien.

He takes longer to eat, becoming to pre-occupied with what surrounds him. He likes to look at the beauty marks on my arms and chest, his eyes sometimes catching mine as he gives a faint attempt to smile. His hand likes to hold my thumb as I hold him up.

"Should we use a little of that medicine Chris gave us for Phoenix?" Tobias asks, rubbing Phoenix's back as she has a small coughing fit.

"She said that we should only use it if she is throwing up." I say, eyeing the coughing baby.

"Hopefully she isn't like this tomorrow." He sighs, kissing her head and leaning against the armrest of the couch.

Damien finally unlatched and I burp him efficiently, rising from the couch and leading Tobias to the nursery. We place the babies into their appropriate cribs before shutting their doors and sighing in satisfaction at another easy bedtime.

"All good." Tobias whispers, taking my hand and leading me to our bedroom.

~.~.~

"Tomorrow you will be Mrs. Prior Eaton." He reminds me as I lay with my head on his chest.

"Tomorrow we will be united as one." I whisper, kissing his empty ring finger.

"We've been united since that moment you chose to take my hand out of the many others when you were in that net." He says, kissing the back of my head and pulling me towards him a little tighter.

* * *

**Shauna loves Phoenix... I honestly thought it would be sweet because I always insinuated Shauna as a strong woman and then her comes this tiny baby and she just melts and becomes this sweet kind person. **

**Comment if you like that about Shauna  
Comment if you hate it  
I'm keeping it that way though so you know complaining won't help.**

**I'M GETTING BRACES NEXT WEDNESDAY!  
I DON'T WANT BRACES!  
****MY TEETH ARE ALREADY ALMOST STRAIGHT!  
****WHY ME! WHY?**

**I had a science test today, it gave me an awful migraine.  
I have a french test tomorrow, it will probably give me a migraine as well.  
I have exams in 5 weeks... that is most definitely going to put me in a coma!  
**

**-Valentina **


	20. Chapter 20- Silver Rings

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing. All rights to Veronica Roth. **

* * *

Chapter 20

"You know I never thought changing behind a tree could be suck a hassle." I laugh, emerging from behind the large Willow tree we each took turns behind.

"Better then getting on and off a train with them on." Chris supplies, holding Phoenix who looks up intently.

"Imagine how many problems we would've have." Tori exasperated, smoothing out the front of her dress.

"I'm so sure Chris would've been able to get on that train with her heels." Lynn comments making everyone laugh.

"Sorry if I've become accustomed to these bad boys." Chris kicks her toe up to show her black heel.

"Come one beauty queen, the bride needs to get married." Shauna says, taking Phoenix in a swift motion.

"Alright let's get going." I say, shoving the last bag in the hollow log and dusting off my white dress.

We walk as a group to the beginning of the meadow where in the fading light I can see the guys standing in a beaming way. Tobias has yet to look up.

Tobias' POV

I want to look up, I want to see where my Tris and daughter stand but I can't. I'm paralyzed looking at the ground. My mind is screaming that if I look they will disappear, I don't want to look until I'm sure my heart will guaranty she will stay.

"She looks great Tobias." Zeke whispers as he pats my shoulder. I smile at the thought of her face. Her icy blue eyes with tints of grey, her small nose and thin lips. The way her new blonde locks stop at her shoulders but still sway with every light step. She is a glorious goddess and I know that my life is devoted to her and our babies. My heart is locked in her's and it is safest where I've left it.  
She's also compassionate, never once talking about the scars of my sides and lower back, which I'm not able to cover with tattoos. She does however appreciate them, kissing them and idling them like they make me better even though I felt worse with them.  
She does small things that people never notice but I do. She taps her left foot when she is impatient and chews the inside of her mouth when she lies. Her body shakes when she is scared, her eyes can flood with tears as quick as she can get rid of them. My favourite habit is her singing, when she is happiest or just trying to make one of the twins smile her voice is all I allow myself to hear in our apartment

_When you look up she will be standing there, your whole world will be standing there._

Listening to my head I look up and there is my beautiful Tris. Her smile is light and her hands hold the small bouquet of white flowers from the meadow. We stand in front of each other, my hand closing around her's as I feel the engagement ring I gave her.

"We are gathered here for the wedding of Tris Prior and Tobias Eaton. Is it cool if I use your real name?" Zeke asks me, I nod in response. I would say something but I'm to captivated by the beauty of Tris.

"Are you, Tris here of your own free will, and do you intend to marry Tobias Eaton?"

"I do." She says, her smile and overall look glowing in the sunlight.

"Are you, Tobias here of your own free will, and do you intend to marry Tris Prior?"

"I do." I say, giving Tris' hand a small squeeze.

"Alright you guys can tell each other whatever you want." Zeke offers, stepping back slightly and leaving me to the sight of Tris.

"Tobias, I knew you were mine from the start. When your hand grabbed mine it was instant electricity. When you lifted me from the net and I saw your eyes it was ultimate want. But the moment that I knew we were meant to be was the night that you climbed up that ferries wheel with me. I was breaking away from what I was supposed to do and you followed, saving me when I almost fell and questioning if I was even human. Maybe it was that sporadic action of mine that made you realize that I was more than a Stiff from Abnegation." This received a few laughs from everyone despite her eyes welling up with tears.

"I almost lost you, we were broken but you fixed us. You always fix us and you always know what to say. Sometimes I feel like you're the only thing keeping me together when I feel like falling apart.

So Tobias, today when we officially become one I want you to know that out of all the decisions I've made in my life, this was probably the best one." Tears were falling from both our eyes, words seemed almost unfathomable. But I still owed her a declaration of my love.

"Tris, my love. If words were comprehensible at the moment I would have flooded you with a million reasons why you are perfect but after what you said I seem to be speechless. Instead I'm going to tell you a story from a few days ago. To many it would slide away with ease but I think it should be kept alive because I know why I truly love you from this story.

I was 2 days after the twins came home, Phoenix caught a cold and she was screaming all night, remember?" She nod. "Well Damien was irritable as well from his sister and so you had me hold him in the living room while you stressed over Phoenix a 4am. I honestly thought we were going to die! The screaming and the coughing and just fear itself took over until you began to sing. It was so sweet the way your words flowed freely through the apartment. Phoenix became silent immediately, Damien was lulled to sleep. I was brought to tears. You Tris Prior show me different sides of myself I didn't know existed. You're the only you can make me cry in happiness instead of fear, you're the only who can draw a smile this bright from my lips. My heart feels empty without you and I know that today means I won't have to feel that ever again. I love you Tris, more than words can describe and I hope that you and I will live the best years of our lives together with our family."

We exchange rings, smiling at each other as our shaky hands try to put the silver rings on one another's left ring finger.

"I pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride." Zeke declares loudly, my hands falling on Tris' cheeks as I pull her in for a kiss like no other. Her hands fall over mine and she cries as we kiss.

"I love you Tobias." She whispers when we pull away and my thumbs wipe under her eyes.

"I love you too Tris."I whisper, kissing her once more and then looking to our friends. They all have tears in their eyes and our babies smile their first real smiles. Tris takes Damien while I take Phoenix and together we stand as a family in our meadow under our willow tree, close to our mountain.

* * *

**Well that took longer to post than I thought.  
Only 4 more weeks of school... and then exams :(**

**News from my school that there will be no more christmas exams though! That's seriously the best thing I've heard in a long time. **

**I'm getting a sweatshirt from my rowing team next week :) I have the shirt and now the sweater, I feel so proud to be apart of my rowing family.**

**-Valentina**


	21. Chapter 21- You're Such a Good Mom

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing. All rights to Veronica Roth.**

* * *

Chapter 21

Tris' POV

I was whole again that night. I was deprived of Tobias' body for 9 months and it was magical feeling this way again. He seemed almost robotic to me when I first met him, but after being with him I feel like he is more human than anyone in the world.

We were a jungle of limbs afterwards, my face tucked by his neck as he rested his chin on my head. I would kiss the hollow of his neck every so often because sleep seemed almost impossible and I wanted to spend every waking minute admiring his body. My hand was tracing his abs while the other ran over the markings on his side. He seemed Godly, glistening beside me as his breathing tried to even out, I was in heaven.

After what felt like the most amazing moments of my life we fell asleep. My body was tucked into his sweet-smelling chest, time stopped for what felt like forever.

But of course in the life of Tobias and Tris Eaton, nothing perfect lasts forever… we heard a loud cry from the nursery.

~.~.~

I shot up in bed, Tobias following quickly. I threw on my underwear and shorts along with Tobias' red shirt leaving the room as fast as possible. When we entered the nursery Damien was crying with such furiosity I thought the whole compound would hear him. I approached his crib side; looking quickly to find Phoenix staring at the ceiling with such fear her body shook.

"Buddy, what's the matter?" I ask, placing my hand on his stomach only to find it firmly swollen. I look to Tobias fearfully as my mind racks to figure out what Dr. Pomel told me the first time I breast-feed Damien.

_Be sure to burp them otherwise gas fills their stomachs and they can get colic._

COLIC! That's it.

"Tobias did you burp him after we feed him?" I ask quickly.

"No I thought you did." He says, picking up Phoenix who began to cry.

"Oh boy, we need to get a better handle on this!" I exasperate, picking up Damien and walking to the living room. I press the switch to start a fire and place him on his moon shaped pillow.

"Tobias go grab me his blanket." I say lightly, while lying next to Damien and running my hand over his stomach.

Tobias returns with the blue knit blanket. I take it as his hand falls over Phoenix's ear to block out the sound.

"Can you take her to our room? Try to put her back to bed and slip her on top of the covers with her moon pillow around her." I suggest scooting the moon pillow towards him and going back to rubbing Damien's stomach.

"Okay, do you need anything?" He asks while scooping up the pillow.

"No, just try to put her bed, and get some sleep yourself. You have to go back to the control room in the morning anyways. Don't worry about me, I'll take care of Damien." I shoo him off and he walks into our room quickly, shutting the door and calming Phoenix immediately.

"Shh Damien. It's all right mommy's right here. Your tummy hurts, I know baby." My voice soothes him as his continues thrashing his arms and legs. I proceed to whisper sweet nothings and run my hand over his stomach for the next 6 hours straight. Soon enough his eyes become droopy and despite his stomach still being swollen his sobs subside and he is whimpering in a light sleep.

I don't stop my hand however, I know it's keeping him asleep.

My eyes feel heavy, my head in spinning slightly but I will not sleep until Damien's stomach has become soft once again and he is sleeping without pain.

My hand reaches to his forehead momentarily, touching both his cheeks in case he has fever like Phoenix. It stayed cool though, just as I had hoped and I return to rubbing his stomach. From outside I begin to hear the first people leave their apartments indicating the start of a new day.

When I watch Damien in the firelight a pang of remembrance hits.

The day my mom fell and broke her wrist I cried, it was supposedly selfish of me since I wasn't the injured person but I was young and fearful. That night while dad was still out working mom sat on the couch with me. The both of us watched the fire as she stroked my blonde hair with good her hand and whispered sweet words. She was different from other Abnegation mother's. She wasn't someone who abolished Caleb or I when we did something a little selfish like cry when it was someone else's pain or pout when someone got something we didn't. Instead she told us how emotion is something incomparable and even though we live under certain faction rules it's okay to feel certain ways. She told us the proper way to act though, adjusting our ways so we'd be better children. Caleb learned quickly, I've always been stubborn.

~.~.~

"Tris?" Tobias whispers as our room door creaks open. He approaches me with a blanket and pillow, placing the pillow under my head and tossing the blanket over Damien and I.

"Thank you." I whisper sleepily. He strokes back my hair and kisses me on the lips.

"I'm going to take Phoenix to Shauna and Zeke. They can babysit for us." He assures.

"Okay, there's some milk in the fridge, tell them how to prepare it and remind them to burp her. I'll probably pick her up at lunch time."

"Zeke and Shauna said they will be back from work at 12pm . I'll keep Phoenix for the time being at the control room. Max said she can stay all day but I think it may get a little difficult juggling work and a baby." He says.

"I'll see how Damien does then." I say thoughtfully, Tobias nodding.

"You're such a good mom." He comments, kissing me once again and then standing up. I watch him walk to the bedroom and hear the tap of the shower turn on. The sound of water against the shower floor echo's lightly for 5 minutes before Tobias shuts it off. The drawers creak open and shut with a little _click. _

When he emerges from the room he is dressed in jeans and a black shirt, his arms cradling a still sleeping Phoenix. He walks to the nursery and begins to pack a baby bag. I can see him go from one side of the room to the next through the crack in the door. Phoenix is changed into a footsie outfit and then placed into a carrier that Tobias straps to his chest.

"All ready." Tobias whispers to Phoenix, crouching to grab the diaper bag he packed and heading to my side again.

"Call me if you need anything!" He demands, placing a kiss by my ear and then on my lips.

"Okay, love you." I whisper, kissing Phoenix's head and then allowing them to stand up.

"Love you too."

And with those words he left, Damien continuing the light whimpering in his sleep as his stomach staying rock hard.

~.~.~

My eyes feel heavier, as the hours go by. I need sleep, coffee, a shower! Something that can wake me up just a little bit more than I am right now.

Damien's earsplitting cries start again, his face turning red faster than I thought and his little fists flailing in agony. I get to my feet and pick him up, my hand still rubbing his tummy.

I don't know what to do, I'm alone, and it's only 7am. Tobias is at work and the only way I can call him is by lunchtime. Until then I'm stuck trying to calm down my baby.

"Do you want a bath? Is that what you need? Maybe water will help you fix your tummy ache." I sooth him quickly and carry him to the bathroom. I flip the tap of the shower on and wait for a small amount of water to flood the bottom. I place Damien on the small changing table we built-in as he continues his angry kicking while rocking back and forth, the small fences around the sides keeping him from falling out. While his cries persist I grab the baby shampoo and soap from under the table and place them by the tub.

"It's okay, you'll be fine." I promise him, removing his pajamas and still clean diaper. He was never the kind of baby to soil himself at night.

I lift him from the table and place him in the tub, the warm water stopping his crying almost immediately.

"You see it's not so bad." I whisper, scooping water with a cup and lightly splashing his stomach. His eyes go back to closing so I continue with my splashing.

The water stays warm for a good 10 minutes before I feel it cool slightly. His hair gets a quick washing and rinse before I run a hand over his slick stomach to find it has become softer. It isn't completely normal but it's loosening up.

I unclog the drain and take Damien for a quick dry and change into new pajamas. Too cold and tired to do anything else I take him back to the living room and place him on his pillow. My head lies on the one Tobias brought me and with a few rubs of Damien's tummy I'm out like a light.

Tobias' POV

I handed Phoenix off to Shauna and Zeke at the beginning of lunch, excusing myself so I could go and check on Tris and Damien. I felt awful leaving her especially since she's been up all night but I was requested to start work again today and I need to keep this job to provide for the family.

I shove my hand into my right pocket extracting the apartment key, which I push into the lock and open the door with. When I enter the whole room is silent, I drop my keys with a _clink _on the entrance table and head over to the living room. The fire is a light yellow; Tris must've changed the temperature to keep Damien from over heating.

They were both sleeping, Damien actually snoring instead of whimpering. I reconsider waking up Tris, I know she hardly slept last night due to her soothing Damien. But concern gets the better of me so I crouch down beside her body and stroke back her short hair.

Her eyes flutter open to reveal her red eyes.

"Hey sweetheart, I know you're tired but I was wondering if you wanted anything. I can go and get you some food or make you something to drink."

"I'm just really not feeling to good. Do you mind taking Damien to his crib while I go to our bed? His stomach seems fine now."

"Okay," I nod, taking Damien and placing him in his crib with his blanket back on the end like Phoenix's.

Back in the living room Tris is sitting up, her hands are rubbing her tired face before she gives off a very heavy cough. It seemed to have shocked her as much as it did me because she placed a hand over her chest as though it hurt a lot.

"Tris," I say with concern as I rush to her side and place my hand over her forehead and cheeks.

"I'm fine." She decides, pushing my hand back and trying to stand up. I look at her in dismay as she sways all the way to our room. Her body gives way when the bed is close enough and with her little energy she covers herself with the blankets.

"Tris," I say again, not caring that she pushed my concern away last time. I sit on my side of the bed and run a careful hand through her hair. "Honey I know something is wrong." I test, trying to make her confess how she is feeling.

"I'm just really tired Tobias. If you can just let me sleep that'd be great. I'll see you after your shift is over. Bring Phoenix home as well, Damien is okay now." Her voice is raspy and it seems to pain her to speak.

"I don't want to leave you because I know you're getting sick." I demand.

"Tobias, please!" She begs, flipping over and pulling the blankets tighter around herself.

"Okay, call me if you need me here though." I say, kissing the back of her head and getting to my feet. She says nothing so I head out the door saying a quick, "I love you."

~.~.~

I watch the many screens in the control room. A few surround the pit and chasm, others stay in the cafeteria and hallways of the compound.

"How's Tris?" Danny, the past initiate who was cut from Dauntless but was brought back upon my request, asks.

"Damien had colic last night, she stayed with him the whole time. By lunch time he was better I guess so she's finally getting some sleep."

"My little brother used to get colic a lot, he'd cry all night so my mom had to stay with him. If it happens again try heating up warm water with honey and mint. It's a light tea that helps sooth stomachs. Cured his colic in less time."

"Thanks Danny." I smile at her quickly and then look back to the screen.

In the cafeteria Drew, Molly, and Peter sat at a table. Their ugly faces kept contorting with laughter and as much as I'd like not to know what's it's about part of me knows that it isn't funny to anyone else but them.

At the pit Myra and Edward sit together by the railing while Shauna and Chris play with Phoenix. They promised to stay in view of a camera so I can see my little girl.

"That's Phoenix isn't it?" Danny asks, transfixed by the screen showing my little baby.

"Yeah, here I have pictures." I say, digging into my pocket and pulling out my phone. I unclasp the back of my case and pull out two small pictures. One is of Damien holding the finger of Tris. The other one is of Phoenix hugging her black bear and sleeping as usual.

"They're beautiful." She comments, smiling at the two small pictures.

"Thanks." I say, tucking the pictures away and going back to watching the compound.

I began to notice the excessive fanning of hands from people trying to cool off.

"Danny, turn up the air conditioning." I say, she does as told and people begin to relax in the pit.

"Much better." She laughs, leaning back in her chair and changing the music that plays in the compound.

The day stays like this until Max comes in to tell us our shift is over.

"So where are you off to?" Danny asks as I punch in the code to my locker door.

"I'm going to get some food for Tris and pick up Phoenix in the cafeteria."

"Alright, see you tomorrow." She gives off one more smile and then heads out the door, I follow her once my walkie-talkie and control key are tucked in the small locker.

In the cafeteria I stand in line and request for the food to be for me to take home.

"Hey Four." Lynn calls from our usual table, everyone is there except for Tris.

"Hi guys." I say, walking over to them with a brown bag full of food.

"Where's Tris?" Chris asks with her eyebrows furrowed.

"At home with Damien, I supposed Shauna told you all about his colic. She was up all night. I'm just getting food and picking up Phoe." I say gesturing to the baby in Uriah's arms as he awkwardly tries to hold her with Marlene's assistance.

"Take her, she's too tiny I think I might break her!" Uriah exaggerates. I take Phoenix who begins to squeal with happiness. I kiss her nose and wipe the drool that leaks from the edge of her lip.

"Thank you so much for taking care of her." I say to everyone, giving one last smile and then leaving for my apartment.

~.~.~

Upon entering I can hear the heavy cough I heard after tucking Damien into his crib.

The sound carried all the way from our bedroom so I quickly deposit the bag of food on the counter and then Phoenix on her moon pillow by the yellow firelight.

"Tris?" I whisper as I open the room door.

"What do you want Tobias?" Her tone is scratchy and rather hostile.

"I want to check on you, please don't be mad at me." I beg, running a careful hand over her arm. She turns away and coughs a very chesty cough.

"I'm fine, just feed the babies with formula and burp them please." I would fight her until she gives up and admits she's sick but I'd rather not anger her even more.

"Fine, I'll be in the living room. I brought some food back from the cafeteria for us incase you're hungry." I kiss her boiling forehead and leave the room with quite footsteps.

* * *

**Your first kiss is something of importance. You only get to do it once and it will be weird and uncomfortable and even questioning but it will be wonderful none the less.  
I got my first kiss, this one from a guy I met when I was 9. I now realize that he is the longest friend I've ever had. 6 years he has stuck by my side, made me smile brighter than anyone else and stopped me from crying when life got the better of me. He may live 4 hours away, and we may not work, the world may pull us apart but that's thing with us. We get pulled apart and pushed back together again. He knows my likes and I know his.  
He may not know this but he is my world and I hop I am his.**

**-Valentina **


	22. Chapter 22- Hold Me Closer

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing. All rights to Veronica Roth.**

* * *

Chapter 22

Damien was refusing the bottle; I guess he hates not having Tris. All he could do was turn his head back and forth and whimper when the bottle tip got close to his lips.

"Come on Damien, you've got to eat." I stress, tapping his bottom lip with the bottle.

"Look it tastes fine!" I promise him, taking a sip of the warm milk. I never knew formula tasted this bad! I force down the gross milk and fake a smile. "See." I slur slightly, the gross liquid mixing poorly in my stomach.

He must be a smart baby because he knew very well that I did not enjoy his food but he must have also been a very sympathetic baby because he took the bottle and began to down the liquid.

As the light sound of suckling surrounded me I heard the bedroom door click open. Tris had herself wrapped in a blanket and she had a rather green shade to her face.

"Hi," I say as she approaches the brown bag on the counter. "The food might still be warm." I say with a weak smile.

"Thanks." She croaks, peeking into the bag and pulling out the brown box full of fries.

I watch as she eats about 10 fries and then clutch her stomach in pain.

Shakily she places the box back in the bag and walks back to our room. I burp Damien and then scoop up Phoenix with my free arm. Both babies fall asleep instantly, which is amazing to me.

"Sleep tight hiccups." I whisper before I shut their door.

Tris' POV

I had a migraine; going to get those fries wasn't helping me at all. Not only did the firelight make my eyes burn but the fries are making my stomach do somersaults.

I can't even admit to Tobias that I'm sick because I know the babies need more care than I do.

"They're asleep." Tobias' voice rings through my ears as the stream of light from the door burn through my brain. I don't reply because everything hurts so I just turn away from him and pull the covers over my head.

"Honey you need to let me help you." He finally says, sitting behind my back and running gentle fingers over my spine. My throat feels so dry that all I can manage is another heavy cough.

"Have you showered at all today?" He asks me, I shake my head. "Okay why don't we try that, maybe the water will help you." He eases my covers off of me and scoops me up. I don't want to shower but I guess I do need one.

"Here, I'll fill up the tub and get you some medicine." He places me on the toilet like a child and flips on the tap, plugging the drain so water builds up.

I guess it was the mix of lighting and my uneasy stomach that pushed me over the edge. I stood up swiftly and pushed the toilet seat up, falling by the brim and throwing up the fries I ate not 20 minutes ago.

Tobias' hand pulls back my hair and he runs a hand over my back. I think I began to cry because my hot cheeks began to cool down with a stream of liquid.

"Just get it all out." He encourages, his voice soothing my tense body.

I vomit for another 10 minutes until sitting back and crying a little harder.

Tobias flushes the toilet and turns off the bathtub, soaking a towel under the tap before going next to my shaking body.

"Are you going to let me help you now?" He asks me as the towel wipes under my eyes and around my mouth.

"Yeah." I nod reluctantly, sipping the water Tobias handed me. I took the pile he was offering me and began to feel my stomach settle again.

"We should get you cleaned up a little." He suggests, throwing the towel in the sink and helping me to my feet. I'm to tired now so he does everything for me, from removing my clothing to placing me in the tub.

"Close your eyes." He instructs, dumping a cup of water over my hair and starting to lather it in shampoo. He rinses again and then conditions.

Soon I'm being wrapped in a giant towel and carried back to our room. He helps me dry and dress in a big shirt of his.

"Tomorrow you should feel a little better." He promises, tucking me into our bed again and kissing my forehead.

"Why did you do this?" I ask him sleepily as his fingers comb through my wet hair.

"Because we promised to take care of each other." He answers simply.

"But I was being mean to you." I say, remembering how I would snap at him.

"You just didn't want to draw the attention away from the babies."

"I'm sorry for being mean though." I cough again and settle back next to Tobias' thigh.

"You can never be mean, just brave." He places a gentle kiss on my forehead and is about to rise until I grab his hand.

"Stay?" I ask him with a tremor in my voice.

"Always." He promises, moving me up a little and placing me right next to his side once again. I indulge in his smell as he wraps his warm arms around my freezing body. "You're shaking like a leaf."

"Then you have to hold me closer." I say, his grip tightening.

"I love you." He whispers, kissing my forehead.

"I love you too." I say back, kissing the hollow under his neck.

3 Weeks Later

I clutched Damien close to my chest, my hands refusing to release him as Tobias and I walked to the infirmary. Today is the day of his lung removal and I haven't slept at all. My heart was pounding, I was about to release my baby to some doctors so they can cut him open for crying out loud! He's going to be in pain, I'm allowing him to be in pain. I must be an awful mother.

"Tris, you need to hand Damien over to Chris." Tobias draws me from my daze.

"He's going to cry." I argue, holding him closer.

"It's just for a quick checkup to make sure that we can go forth with the surgery." Chris says sweetly.

"No," I shake my head a little harder. "Please you can't-"

"Tris he needs to go." Tobias warns, his eyes telling me how he won't allow anything to happen to Damien.

"He won't get hurt, he just needs some looking over." My hands loosen enough for Chris to take him.

"I'll give him back in 10 minutes." She promised, leaving the room with quick stride.

"He will be fine." Tobias wrapped his arm around me and placed a kiss on my head, pulling me close to his side.

That was when the crying in the hallway began.

He wailed.

He sobbed.

I could envision his red face as he kicked his little legs.

He's tiny, nothing more than 6 pounds and he was screaming for help.

He was screaming for Tobias or I, one of us has to save him.

~.~.~

Chris returned with a whimpering Damien and an IV following in suit. His hand had a white tap surrounding it, holding it was a needle, which flowed into the IV bag.

"Just a little sleeping and pain medicine should get him ready for the procedure in a few minutes. Just give him a few kisses and Dr. Renigan should be here shortly to collect him." Chris leaves once again. This time Damien is in Tobias' arms as I examine his small white covered hand.

"He's fine, it's just a needle." Tobias fuses over my worry.

"Be brave Damien." I whisper, kissing his head and stroking down his blond hair.

Dr. Reigan came for Damien, carrying him to a clear basinet and then walking out of the room.

~.~.~

"He's going to be in pain." I demand, my eyes watering with tears.

"He won't be awake to feel it." Tobias contradicts, kissing my forehead.

"But he will be in pain afterwards!" I continue to fight.

"Tris, listen to me." Tobias took both of my shoulders and narrowed his eyes on mine. "What was the one thing I promised you and the twins?" He asked.

"To keep us safe." I whisper as I fail to stop crying.

"Exactly, I won't let Damien get hurt and I will do anything and everything in my power to protect him and make him as comfortable after this procedure." His hands move to my cheeks and he wipes away my tears with his thumbs.

"I just can't stand the thought of not being with him. He needs me when there is someone trying to put a mask over his face and is removing a vital organ from his chest. I just don't want to be a bad mother."

"You can never be a bad mother." Tobias promises. "Now let's just wait, it's all we can do for now." He takes me to sit down; our long wait starting the moment our butts hit the chairs.

~.~.~

Dr. Renigan came to fetch us, a tired smile working onto his face. Before waking Tobias who fell asleep on my shoulder I run my hands over my jeans trying to clear the sweat that has built up on them.

"Tobias wake up." I nudge him in the ribs with my elbow and rise quickly, meeting Dr. Renigan halfway.

"Tris, Tobias. The procedure went very well. Damien's lung has been removed and he is on oxygen for now. We are keeping him over night so we can ease him off of the oxygen so then by tomorrow he will be an independent breather. Expect some struggling for the first week, his chest will feel tight and all though the lung we removed was doing nothing for him, he is used to receiving a certain amount of oxygen, that has changed so he'll be confused. You can come see him now." I can't say anything except a tight "thank you."

We walk towards the recovery room, my hand clutching to the shirt of Tobias.

"Room 2." Dr. Renigan goes another direction leaving Tobias and I on our on. He begins to walk forward, my hand being pulled so I'm being forced after him.

"Hey guys." Chris whispers as she rocks Damien in a soothing fashion. He has nubbins in his nose and the same tube coming from his right hand. There is a new monitor attacked, this one wrapped around his small foot and connecting to a heart monitor.

"How is he?" I choke out, releasing Tobias' shirt and walking towards my son. His hair is everywhere and his little whimpers remind me of how he was half asleep, half awake with his colic.

"He's perfectly fine. Dr. Renigan informed me that I have to tell you how to bathe him and dress him. Follow me here." Chris walked towards a dimly lite part of the room, a small bed under the light.

"He will need to be washed with a wet cloth, avoid using soap on his body, wash his hair over a sink and do not rub his stitches. When you clean his stitches take a different clean cloth and soak it in warm water." She began to pull off the thin hospital gown leaving Damien in a diaper and a red line down the left side of his chest. There was a little blood leaking from it and he had about 4 large stitches.

Chris pulled out 2 wash clothes and walked toward the sink, soaking both towels and coming back to us.

"Who usually washes the babies?" She asks, I step forward.

"Tobias dresses and does their diapers."

"Okay, here first just wipe down his body and face." She hands me one towel and I do as instructed, wiping Damien and avoiding his tender chest.

"Good now with this you are going to lightly dab his stitches. Do not press down to hard and no rubbing just gentle dabs." I take the second towels and dab his chest. Damien stirs and begins to cry loudly making me back up and release the small towel next to his body.

"It's okay, it just hurts for now. Here Tobias why don't you dress him again?" Chris suggests, I step away for Tobias to dress Damien again.

My hands continue to shake so Chris comes to my side. "I can't do it, I'll hurt him." I tensely say.

"Tris, it's okay that he cried, you were doing what was best for him and sure it hurt him but he won't remember that later."

"Okay." I whisper as Damien's crying subsides and Tobias finished dressing him.

* * *

**So I haven't had food in about 4 days because my braces hurt. The lack of food is making me sleep more and I can't go to rowing due to the fear from my parents that I'm going to pass out. Any suggestions on what I should eat other than soup? I really hate soup and ice cream... don't ask why, I just do.  
Yesterday I saw X-Men: Days of Future Past, it was beautiful! **

**Next week I'm going to see Maleficent and in 2 weeks I'm seeing The Fault in Our Stars. Goodie, more reasons to fail my exams and cry over the feels!**

**-Valentina **


	23. Chapter 23- Kicking Feet and Peas

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing. All rights to Veronica Roth.**

* * *

Chapter 23

"TOBIAS!" I cry loudly, fumbling to grab my phone from my pocket and calling for my husband who was showering.

"TOBIAS YOU'RE GOING TO KILL ME IF YOU MISS THIS!" I call out loudly finally pulling up the camera from my phone and focusing the video on the twins.

There was a loud thud and then our door opened to reveal Tobias dripping water everywhere and holding a towel to his drenched hair as his jeans hang onto his hips due to the lack of a belt.

"What's the matter?" He breathes loudly, eyes frantic as he caught sight of the twins. "Oh my god!" He said with an excited chirp, dropping next to me, water from his hair hitting my bare shoulder. "Are they really doing this?" He asks in near shock as his eyes stick to our children.

"I turn around to grab Phoe's bear and next thing I know she's dragging her legs behind her, Damien following in suit." I laugh loudly as Damien flops back to his belly but persists on kicking with his legs.

"Come on guys, keep coming to us. Phoe do you want your bear?" Tobias lifts the bear I dropped next to be and wiggles it for the babies. I toss his a giraffe from Damien while steadying the camera and quickly show Tobias shaking the two stuffies.

"Come on babies, come to mommy and daddy." I encourage, laughing as Phoenix now takes a small tumble. They begin to crawl side by side one another. Damien looking to Phoenix for instructions, Phoenix looking to Damien for reassurance. They finally crawl to Tobias' lap and accept the award of their favourite toys.

I cut the camera and scoop up Phoenix.

"Our babies can crawl!" I announce loudly, standing up and holding Phoenix high above me. I was so proud of them; our little 8-month-old son and daughter have come across a huge milestone. I hug Phoenix to my chest and kiss her head profusely as she giggles into my neck.

They know Tobias and I are proud, they are taking in this celebration with glee.

"I think we should show this new ability off, don't you agree Tris?" Tobias asks with a bright smile as Damien tugs at his daddy's bottom lip.

"I do think so." I say in agreeance as Phoenix's hand holds onto my hair.

"How does dinner and cake sound?" Tobias asks, the twins perking at the sound of cake.

"You kids are just like your father." I exasperate, walking to the kitchen and pulling out two green containers filled with mashed peas.

"Hand me their bag Tobias?" I ask, placing the food on the counter and grabbing their little spoons. Tobias gives me their black baby bag with spare diapers and blankets inside at all times. I tuck the food and spoons in, adding two empty bottles for their milk that the cafeteria workers gladly give to us.

"Alright, let's go and show your family what you can do." I cheer to the babies, taking the bag on my shoulder and heading for the door. Tobias got a shirt on and was already kicking on his convers, my feet sliding into my own pair. I push the spaghetti strap from Phoenix's dark red dress up her shoulder and try to fix her untamable hair. Tobias on the other hand spikes Damien's hair slightly and adjusts the buttons of his polo shirt.

"All set." I announced as Phoenix continued her grabbing of my lip just like Damien did to Tobias.

"Let's go." Tobias takes my hand in his and together we walk to the cafeteria, the twins squealing as they realize our destination (a.k.a where they can eat)

When we open the double doors Damien instantly goes crazy, he obviously spotted Uriah, his funny man. Damien enjoys Uriah's annoyance and takes pride that he can tug at his ear lobes and lip making him irritable.

"My princess!" Shauna cried loudly, most of the cafeteria turning to look. Phoenix shook her legs excitedly as though she could run to Shauna.

"You won't believe what they learned to do." I announce, Tobias and I stopping at the head of the table. Before us sat a group of people we didn't really know and then our group.

"Hey Phoe go see Shauna." I urge, placing her on the table as she crawled to our group. Damien was placed inches behind her and due to the sudden cheering from our friends the whole cafeteria whooped and cheered on our children. They kept chanting for them to continue and I laughed at the excitement on their small faces.

"GO HICCUPS!" Will called loudly, Phoenix making it past the first group of cheering people and to our friends. She sits promptly in the center of the table, Damien sitting next to her since she was blocking the way. The cheering broke into loud applause and then back to the rowdy, usual talk.

"I'll get our food." Tobias tells me as I sit down and take Phoenix off the table. She usually enjoys me feeding her while Damien prefers Tobias.

"Oh my god when did they learn that?" Chris asks as she puts her hand up for Damien. He gave her a high-five and a small squeak of happiness. She laughed at his cuteness.

"A few minutes before we came. Tobias was showering and then they just did it. I managed to get a video." I hand my phone off to the other side of the table, Marlene and Uriah jumping up and running to the other side to see the video as well. Awws came from our friends, Tobias placing a single tray down in front of me as it held two plates. He took the bottles from the bag and promised to be back quickly. I think they restarted the video because Tobias managed to get the bottles filled while I opened both baby foods and got bibs around both of the twins.

"That's a great video. I'm sending that to me." Marlene announces, taking the phone from Zeke and pressing the buttons on the screen.

Everyone returned to their food while Marlene and Uriah came back to our side of the table. I got my phone back and began to prop Phoenix on my lap for easier feeding.

Damien was already munching away at his peas while I scooped a small spoonful and offered it to Phoenix. As usual she was withdrew from my hand, smashed into me before she had no more ability to get any further from her dinner.

"Phoenix!" I whine, knowing how this would end. She never liked her food, Tobias and I have tried different mashed food and offered her different ways of preparation, all of which she turns down.

Her pickiness was the most pronounced thing as Damien and her got older. He loves to eat anything from mashed carrots to those soft baby sausages, which I for once understood why Phoenix hated. The smell was horrid.

"Phoe you can't keep up with this. We were told that your to sensitive for our food." I try to reason with an 8 month old!

The only food she does accept is the one that Tobias and I get to eat. Dr. Quin said it wasn't all to healthy to feed her it however because she and Damien have sensitive stomachs and it can either make her vomit or have awful diarrhea (It's happened before)

To this lack of food and nutrients she stayed tiny, Damien becoming larger than her within weeks of changing them from milk to solids.

"Just give her some from our plates, she needs to eat." Tobias relinquished.

I close the food and move the tray closer to me, looking at the arrangement of cut steak and peas.

"Huh, well that's ironic." I say, Phoenix's blue eyes looking up to me as if requesting to be feed to food. "I'm only giving you peas." I tell her, taking the round vegetable and offering it to her mouth. She eyes it and then closes her small lips around the ends of my three fingers. I release the pea in her mouth and my fingers away as she chews.

"Why won't she just eat the peas mashed?" Zeke asks me with a chuckle.

"Because she's like her mother," Tobias suddenly starts. "Stubborn and always wanting to do it her way." He winks at me as I smack his firm upper arm. I take another pea and slowly feed Phoenix, one pea at a time.

"Can she eat meat?" Uriah asks through a mouthful of what seems to be chicken and rice.

"She likes to gnaw at it." I say taking a piece and holding it. Phoenix puts it in her mouth and begins to chew, I don't let the end that's not in her mouth go because I know she can choke.

Tobias closed the empty container from Damien and grabbed his fork. He took a piece of meat and held it in front of me. I took the meat into my mouth and gave a sheepish smile. We usually do this, when the first person finished feeding one of the twins we help the other one eat so the food won't get too cold.

We somehow manage to eat and clear our table, the twins too full to be crazy.

"Do you guys wanna go to the pit or are they in need of going to bed?" Chris asks, Tobias answers by showing her Damien who lies knocked out on his shoulder.

"Well, see you guys tomorrow." She waves us off and Tobias and I head back to our apartment, not even thinking twice when receiving the gift of a night's rest.

* * *

**Well it wasn't all to eventful but hey they're crawling! Like I said, I'm showing important parts of their lives while trying to move the story along. This was, incase you can't read properly, they're milestone at the ago of 8 months. **

**Yes, babies can chew on meat at this age, I know I did as a baby. And come on imagine how cut it would be if the two of them crawled across the table as the whole ****dauntless compound cheered them on!**

**So big surprise next chapter... well it just seems shocking, nothing to big. I'll post it tomorrow though. **

**Sleep well :) or enjoy your day...**

**-Valentina **


	24. Chapter 24- Attention for Two?

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing. All rights to Veronica Roth.**

* * *

Chapter 24

2 and half years old

"Mommy," A sleepy voice echoed in the apartment, my head turning around from my place on the couch to see Damien emerge from his room with a rather large cow lick and sleepy eyes.

"Hi baby." I smile, standing up and meeting him halfway.

"Mommy my chest hurt." He complains in a very jumbled wordy fashion while heaving a very strong-looking breath. This happens often, the single lung being over worked therefore Damien feeling pressure in his chest.

"Did you have some water?" I ask him, his head shaking in response. I take him from under his armpits and place him on my hip. He rests his head on my shoulder and continues his tight breathing. I walk to the kitchen and place him on the counter, opening the cabinet near him and pulling out a blue sippy cup. I fill it with cold water and hand it to Damien, my hand holding his knees as he drinks some water.

"Where daddy?" He asks me with a confused look. It was quite early for him, not even 7am, Tobias left for work at 6am and I was sitting in the living room reading before Damien came to me. The twins usually aren't up until 8 or 9 leaving me some time to unload the dishwasher and fold yesterday's dry laundry.

"He's at work, do you want to go back to bed or help mommy with some things?"

"Help you." He decides with a small smile, the water obviously did the trick. I smile back and take him off the counter, placing him by the dishwasher and opening the metallic machine. Steam lifted around us making Damien giggle. I pull out the bottom drawer of clean dishes and begin to pull them out, Damien following in suit. He would pull them off the rack and either tiptoe to put the on the counter of hand them to me. We hardly have anything in there except for the sippy cups and extra bowls the kids use for snacks in the apartment. We only run a load every 2 days so the dishwasher can load up a bit and then be used again.

"All done!" Damien announces, taking the last bowl out and handing it to me. He slid the rack in with his one hand, the other holding his sippy cup. Then he shut the dishwasher with a click.

"Good boy. Thanks for helping." I smile, stroking his hair back. He jumps a little and walks to the living room, I put away the stuff he placed on the counter.

When I get to the living room Damien had began to stack blocks in the blue firelight. Heating and cooling has been malfunctioning in the compound so it was pretty hot out right now. The fire was blue to help cool down the room while illuminating it nicely.

"Do you want a bath before Phoe wakes up?" I ask him, crouching by his tower.

"Okie." He agrees, standing up and sliding his hand into mine. I walk with him to his room, whispering him to be quiet for Phoenix who was still sleeping in her bed.

Tobias switched them from their cribs last weeks because they kept climbing out and almost dying each time.

"Can you grab your towel?" I ask him, pointing to the cabinet once we were in the bathroom. He proudly walks away from me and begins to rummage in the cabinet while I turn on the bath and allow semi warm water to fill it. Halfway to the top I stop the water and help Damien remove his clothes and pull up.

"I used toilet." He said to me, addressing the clean pull up.

"Good boy, soon you won't be needing this." I said with a smile as I disposed of the nighttime pull up. Damien quickly stepped up on the small stool and sat on the seat that is to help them use the toilet. It's smaller so they won't fall in but they can still flush and not have to worry about having a plastic container to do their business in.

When he flushed and got into the tub I began to scoop water in a cup and bathe him. He played was a small sailboat and kept trying to hold it under water, each time it would pop back up with a giant water bubble.

I used a sponge to wash off his body and out of habit dabbed the scar on the left side of his chest. I know it doesn't hurt anymore but I remember all of his crying and Tobias having to take over because I would start crying myself.

"Close your eyes." I tell him, rinsing his shampoo lathered hair and then unplugging the drain. He stood up and shivered slightly until I wrapped the towel around him. I picked him up and carried him back to the room where Phoenix began to turn slightly.

"Alright let's get you dressed." I say, drying him off and leaving the towel draped over his head. I pick out a new pull-up along with a pair of shorts and black print shirt. He knew the drill: Leg, leg. Arms up. And then you're done. He shook his head a little, and I ran my fingers through his hair. It would lie smoothly later but for now it stayed in wet spikes. "Okay you can go back to your blocks." I say when he was dressed. He obediently walked out of the room leaving me with his laundry. I tossed the clothes in the hamper in the hall and refolded the towel, placing back under the cabinet. As I left the bathroom Phoenix moaned. This can't be good.

Her body shook, she made an incredulous noise of fear and then sat up quickly, sweat covering her forehead as tears streaked her face.

Her tears became sobs and she was soon crying for me to hold her. I scooped her up and kissed her forehead profusely, rocking her back and forth as I sat where she laid. Her sobs continues and Damien must have heard because he came in to see his sister.

"What happened?" He asked me with a tremor in his voice.

"She just had a nightmare Damien, it's alright. Why don't you go and watch TV?" I suggest, he gave her a quick kiss on the head and left. My arms loosened their grip so I could see Phoenix's face. She was really shaken up about something, I just couldn't figure out what.

"He take me." She finally said, my eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

"Who took you baby?" I ask her, smoothing her curls out and feeling the warmth of her head.

"Big man." She told me her eyes were wild with fear.

"It's okay. I'm here. No man will get you." I promise her, hugging her close to me again and then wrapping a blanket around her shaking body. I rose from her bed and walked to the living room.

Damien was content with his blocks. My heart ached for him, he was so used to being behind the scenes due to Phoenix's constant health issues. She was always sick, always tiny, and always underweight. We had weekly doctor visits for her and Tobias and I tended to focus on feeding her. Damien was so independent that it hurt. It was obvious that he was faking it this morning, I knew very well the difference between his breathing issues and fake attempt to having one. He may be two but he knows how to act. He woke up early to have my full attention, he was showing me all he could do hoping I would be proud. I am proud, he's such a great kid, he's my kid.

"Damien," I say, getting his grey eyes on mine. "Do you want to go for breakfast soon? You can eat whatever you like." I tell him, a smile working onto his face.

"Okie." He says, standing up and walking to me.

"Let me help Phoenix bathe and then we can go." I say his smile died immediately.

He nodded in agreement and returned to his blocks, I feel awful.

Phoenix continued to shake even in the warm water and her eyes were still wild. I got her washed quickly and then dressed her in a skirt and black print shirt. She lifted her arms up to me. I picked her up and left her hair alone all together.

"Come one D Man, time for breakfast." I tell him, turning off the fire-place and offering him my hand. He took it and we walked to the entrance together.

I got both of them with their sandals on and only now realized the pink blanket Phoenix still help.

"Phoe do you think you can leave that here?" I ask her. She shook her head quickly and grasped my neck. I took her back on my hip and took Damien's hand.

"Do you want to bring a toy?" I ask him, he nodded and ran back inside, returning with a dinosaur.

"Uriah gave it to me." He declared as he fixed the limbs of the hard toy.

"That was nice of him. Do you know what it's called?" I ask him.

"A T-Rex." He said in a very deep tone, roaring right after as he tried to sound like the toy.

I laughed at him and quickly eyed my trembling daughter. She had her face tucked in my neck and was trying to curl up into me as well as possible.

"Do you think daddy wants to join us?" I ask Damien, his eyes went wide with excitement.

"YAY!" He cried loudly, running around the hall like a silly man. I lead him to a different are of the compound, also known as the training facility. Tobias was training the initiates with Jamie this year since having the twins around would be too hard to deal with. When we entered the large room an echoing thud and groan came from the middle of the room. More groaning and then a crunch. Soon applause was heard and Tobias declared a name.

"Winner, Evon. Round 7, Haden and Ambry." I rounded the corner, taking Damien's hand and standing to watch this years group. It was large, with almost 17 transfers.

Tobias caught me eyes and gave a smile, winking to Damien who waved his hand, well actually waved the T-Rex at him.

Haden knocked out Ambry after a while, both seemed to put up a strong fight. This time Jamie declared the winner and called round 8.

I watched as two boys, both of which I missed the names of, fought aggressively. It wasn't something Damien hadn't seen before, he has been in the pit multiple times and he play fought with Phoenix on many occasions. The fight ended with two bloody men and the bell for breakfast ringing in the room. Everyone stood and waited to be sent off.

One of the girls questioned who I was, catching Tobias off guard.

"I'm Six, Four's wife." I snap at her when I realize the flicker of her eyelashes and odd flirting she was doing with Tobias. I know she's only 16 and Tobias is 22 but he's mine.

"And who are they? 5 and 7? No wait let me guess? One and Two!" One of the boys cackled with laughter, others joined in at the not so funny joke.

"Those are my children and no, those are not their names." Tobias barks loudly, everyone flinched.

"Then what are their names?" One of the kids challenged.

"Damien and Phoenix." Tobias spat loudly the girl lost her smirk.

"So you got to bang her? I bet I would be better." A boy about Tobias' size made the worst comment of his life.

"Excuse me?" Tobias asks, I had covered the ears of Damien by pressing his head into my thigh.

"I would like to remind ALL OF YOU that Six is not just my wife but she is also of high authority around here. You not only listen to me and Jamie but you listen to her and the other dauntless that are in this compound because one stupid, loose tongued comment can end your life." Tobias now eyed the boy. "Am I understood." He seethed, the boy nodded and apologized quietly.

"Leave, all of you!" Jamie demanded, walking away with the group.

"I'm sorry!" I say to Tobias knowing that it was my fault.

"They had to know." He said in his light tone.

"How are you?" I asked him. He shrugged and gave me a grin.

"Fine, you?" He asked me, moving away my hair.

"Well Phoenix had a nightmare and hasn't stopped clinging to me and I'm worried that Damien is being left out." I say quickly.

"Like now?" Tobias asks, addressing our son who stood silently next to Tobias, waiting for his hello.

"Exactly like now." I tell him, pushing him to focus on Damien.

"Hey D Man, what's up?" Tobias crouches in front of Damien and finally manages to make our son smile again.

"Look, I have T-Rex." Damien said proudly showing the toy to Tobias.

"Wow! This is so cool." Tobias said, taking the toy and playing with the moving arms. "Uh-oh, look he ate your nose!" Tobias cried, tapping Damien's nose with the toy's. Damien laughed and wiped at his nose.

"You're silly daddy." Damien laughed, holding Tobias's hand.

"So are you buddy." Tobias handed to toy back to him and then scooped him into the air.

"Look mommy. I flying!" Damien cried, his arms opening wide like a bird.

"You're even taller than daddy." I tell him, he smiled at me.

Tobias dropped Damien down on his shoulders and piggy backed him out of the room, I was close behind.

When we arrived the cafeteria people jumbled around, the usual morning chatter was flying around. I was sure Phoenix was asleep, she wasn't going to wake up until lunch time at the most. We stood in line for food and scanned the area for our friends. Shauna and Zeke approached, Damien calling to them loudly.

"I'm taller than daddy." Damien told Shauna as Zeke cut in behind me.

"What's up?" He asked me, nodding to Phoenix.

"I don't really know anymore." I said, trying not to shift my arm even though it has fallen asleep. Phoenix was a very light load but I've carried her for almost 30 minutes, my arm was tired.

"Hey can you hold her for a minute?" I ask Zeke, he nodded and offered his arms to me. I shook Phoenix from my shoulder carefully, dropping her into Zeke's arms.

I could have sworn she was asleep.

She had to be asleep.

I didn't know how but she let out a blood curling scream the moment my arms left her body.

The whole cafeteria became silent.

Phoenix began to sob between cries for help.

She was in fact asleep, but she was still in her nightmare.

* * *

**I had no school today :) **

**Only 2 and half more weeks until my exams and then I am free. I have 3 exams this year, thank God. English, my strongest subject. Science, I can hold a pretty solid mark. And Math, I'm so screwed.**

**Comment what you think :)**

**-Valentina **


	25. Chapter 25- The Speaking Men

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing. All rights to Veronica Roth.**

* * *

Chapter 25

Zeke nearly threw Phoenix back to me out of fear for what she was doing. I began to rock her as she screamed into the crook of my neck.

"Give her to me." Tobias demanded, I released her to him. Once again she screamed loudly. I took her out and headed for the door, the cafeteria still watching me with careful eyes. I heard a voice call after me as I swerved around different people and made it to the pit. I hoped the music would drown the noise of her sobs, they didn't.

"Tris," Chris came after me, her body shaking at the sight. "What's wrong with her?" She asks me while stroking Phoenix's hair and trying to see her face.

"I don't know! She said she had a nightmare and hasn't let me put her down since. My arm began to ache so when I thought she was asleep I gave her to Zeke. She went crazy!"

"Was that the screaming? Will and I heard it from across the hall. We thought someone was hurt." Chris continued stroking Phoenix's hair. Suddenly she arched her eyebrow and went behind me. Phoenix must have been facing past my back because Chris was asking small questions to my trembling daughter.

"Tris can you come with me back to the infirmary?" Chris asks, I obliged and together we hurried away from the pit and towards the hallways.

We climbed a set of stairs and finally made it to the brightly lite, medicine scented room. There was one of the initiates getting stitches across her forehead while her friends hung around, picking at the different materials.

We took a turn at the end of the hall and then Chris opened the door to a room I didn't know existed. There was simple chair like the ones used for simulations and a few clear cabinets full of brightly coloured vials. Chris patted the chair and told me to sit with Phoenix on my lap. I did and felt Phoenix's fingers press into my hand.

"I scared." She whimpered while Chris opened and closed cabinets. She came back to me with a green liquid, a laptop, and few wires with sticky ends.

With quick hands she began assembling the laptop, pressing in the wires on one end and making them spark red or blue on the other. She typed in a few codes and finally opened up a black monitor. There was no picture, not yet that is.

"Hold her for a minute." Chris says, I wrapped Phoenix with my arms to keep her from moving. Chris pressed two wires onto Phoenix's temples, then one on the back side of her left hand. The final wire was clipped behind her ear causing a beep to echo in the room.

"Here Phoe, drink some of this." Chris handed Phoenix a small paper cup of what looks like water. The yellow vial was empty when I looked. Phoenix drank the "water" not even tasting the difference.

"Alright let me do one last thing." Chris flashed a small light in both of Phoenix's eyes when I saw the screen again I say the brightness Phoenix must have been seeing. Chris looked to the computer as well and moved away from where she stood and image of a dark shadow staying in her place.

The water made Phoenix fall asleep but she clenched her whole body. The figure glitches and gets closer. Phoenix began to sob again, squeezing my hand as she tried to back up further into me.

"It's okay." A voice whispered from the computer. "I won't hurt you." Phoenix cried louder.

The man, the voice, neither one of them was real. Phoenix was the only one who was able to hear them and see them. She couldn't tell that it wasn't real. We were seeing things from her eyes, we were hearing what she heard.

Chris turned off the monitor immediately. She unplugged the wires and take them off of Phoenix's skin.

"Chris what was that about?!" I demand, hugging Phoenix close to me as she grips around my neck.

"Phoenix is having hallucinations. She's being haunted by these men that don't exist." Chris tells me.

"Like ghosts?" I asked.

"No, nothing like ghosts. They are figments of her imagination. Phoenix has obvious symptoms of schizophrenia. Mild schizophrenia that causes her to see things that aren't there and hear sounds that no one else can. It's treatable, there's medication but she needs it for the rest of her life because this won't go away. None of those figures will leave her mind, she's trapped in this mind-state. I'm calling Four over to tell you guys everything." She stepped off to the side, dialing a number on her phone.

Tobias was at the infirmary so fast I could have sworn he flew. He ran up to me stroking Phoenix's hair and offering to hold her. She extended her arms out to him and he wrapped her with his large arms, telling her she will be fine.

Chris emerged from the room we were in a few minutes after Tobias arrived. I had enough time to tell him about Phoenix and what Chris guesses she has. He was lost at first but then immediately flushed in colour.

"What?" I asked him.

"Do you remember how I told you about my friend, Lucas?" He asked, trying to swallow as though there was a lump in his throat.

"Yeah, you guys were 14 when he…." I began to trail with my works.

"When he killed himself. He had schizophrenia, he would be happy one minute, sad the next. He always complained about the voices, that there was someone bad in his head. One day after school I went to my house and he went to his, next thing I hear is him screaming "shut up" and then falling from the top of his house. He killed himself over the voices."

"Chris said it was mild." I try to convince myself. "Phoenix won't have to deal with these images or voices as long s she takes mediation." I add.

"I know I just don't want her… you know. Lucas had so much to offer but those voices broke him."

"We won't let them break her. We will give her the medicine and pray that it works." I demand, turning when Chris walked from behind the counter of medication.

"Lutuda. It's a medication that should help with the sounds and images. It also keeps her mood in tact, no sudden change in attitude. There are some side effects: heart attacks, strokes, migraines, and increasing of symptoms brought on by schizophrenia. I'm sure it will work for her, from the images and voice waves I got I was able to narrow it down. If it doesn't work I want to try blood-work and see what we can make out of it. I don't want you guys stressing over this, it's a mental condition that people can have, she'll be fine as long as you give her half of a pill, smashed up and mixed in water everyday. There are 100 pills in here, when she needs a refill we will see if we need to adjust the amount she uses. Half a pill will be plenty to help her though."

"How long until it works?" I ask, eyeing the bottle of pills.

"Usual a day after taking the first dose, she should feel perfectly normal unless she has a negative reaction. Just keep an eye and call me if something goes wrong."

"Okay, thanks Chris." I give her a hug and take the bottle from her.

"Oh and give it to her at 7pm, everyday." Chris adds quickly.

"Alright, see you at dinner." I say waving to her as she walks away to her new patient. I walk with Tobias out of the infirmary, Phoenix sleeping in his large arms.

"Where's Damien?" I ask, reading over the pill bottle.

"I left him with Shauna since her shift was done. He began to cry saying he wanted me to stay with him. He kept telling me how he needed to show me something but Phoenix needed me, I had to tell him no."

"Like always." I sigh.

"We can't help it, Tris. Phoenix is sick, if we don't help her she can get hospitalized." He said with a little shake of his head.

"How do you think Damien feels?" I suddenly ask him, stopping in my tracks and causing Tobias to turn around to look at me. "How do you think our 2-year-old son is feeling knowing that every minute of everyday his sister needs to be looked after? He forced himself to wake up early just so he could have an hour with me and my full attention. He never once speaks up or disturbs anyone to gloat about what he can and can't do. Didn't you see him today? You were talking to me and he just stood there waiting for us to finish. He could have jumped and screamed and demanded your attention like any normal 2-year-old but instead he just waited. He's always waiting." I could feel the tears welling up in my eyes. "All he ever wants is to make us proud but we can never reward him for that." I choke out, a tear tumbling down my cheek.

"Tris, he'll be fine." Tobias tells me, his hand falling on my cheek as he wipes away the fallen tear. "Look, I understand where you are coming from. He is always trying to show us something in a desecrate way but we never acknowledge it until hours later when we feel sorry that we didn't. We just have to be patient and put more attention to him. He will understand when he is older, he always does." Tobias kisses my forehead, wrapping his free arm around me. Together we walked forward with our sides pressed together.

I needed to find my boy, and I needed to give him a big kiss because he needs to know that his mom loves him.

"Hey did you notice something about Chris today?" I ask Tobias, suddenly re-evaluating the look of my friend.

"Such as?" Tobias looks to me.

"Like the way she looked. Her stomach wasn't flat it seemed bigger."

"So maybe she gained some weight." Tobias suggests but I shake my head.

"No not like fat but like firm. Like a baby bump." And this was only the beginning.

* * *

**Well what do you think? Should Chris be pregnant? **

**I'm tired of studying for exams, it's really boring and really long and I just want to get it over with! Almost there, only 2 more weeks and then I can write my exams.**

**Summer needs to come faster!**

**So my rowing coach just emailed me saying that the new team sweatshirts got in (I think I mentioned it a few chapters back) I get it tomorrow before or after practice, I'm not so sure. All I know is that I'm going to wear that sweatshirt EVERYWHERE!**

**I'm officially going to see TFIOS, my best friend's mom is buying us the tickets tomorrow so we get to see it on Friday, June the 6th. We were freaking out because we both loved the book and I was telling her how I would wear my TFIOS shirt and how she needed to bring the pack of 750 tissues. **  
**We are a mess!**

**Comment if you're enjoying the fanfic, and which chapter is your favourite so far :)**

**-Valentina **


	26. Chapter 26- No Parachute? No Problem

**DICSCLAIMER: I own nothing. All rights to Veronica Roth. **

* * *

Chapter 26

"You're what?" I demand to Chris, my smile growing even larger as the predictions I had from earlier today were confirmed. Will had looped his arm around Chris and kissed her head while the rest of our friends laughed and congratulated them.

"How far along are you?" I ask, my voice shaking with excitement.

"1 and a half months." She smiled, looking to Will with a twinkle in her eyes. "It was a good surprise to find a few weeks ago." She assured us, my eyes now taking in the sight of the small bump on my best friends stomach.

"Hope you guys don't mind sharing a little family love for the new baby." Chris says to Damien and Phoenix. They seemed rather confused but continued to smile. Phoenix seemed better after the medication and was back to her crazy self.

"Baby?" Damien asks as he taps Chris's stomach lightly.

"Yeah little man, she has a baby in there." Will tells my son, he lite up with this discovery.

"Did she eat it?" Phoenix ask with furrowed eyebrows.

"No sweetie, Chrisy didn't eat the baby." Shauna promised, my daughter relaxed immensely.

"Smart kids, I hope this one will be like them." Will says, his hand falling on Chris' stomach.

"I'm so happy for you guys." I say, hugging Chris closely and then looking at her twinkling eyes.

"I'm going to need you most." She said as her long lashes flickered in an attempt to hide tears.

"I'll always be here. Besides if I can have twins at 18 I'm sure you can do the same at 20." I wipe away her slipped tear and she laughs at the thought.

"God it better be a single baby." She exasperates, I now laugh at her worry.

"You'll be a great mother." I tell her, finally releasing her shoulders and going back to Tobias.

"Wait how bad is the… you know giving birth part?" She asks. I look at Tobias and he does what I do. Both of us cover one of the twins ears and then I tell her.

"It's hell, everything hurts and you might think you're dying."

"Also, you are most likely to be screaming a bunch of mean words at Will." Tobias adds quickly

"Yeah, I was lucky to be out of it for most of the beginning. Don't worry you'll be fine though."

"Great." She says, we release the kids ears and watch at Phoenix brawls with her brother.

"Well they can always use another punching bag." I say, Chris covers her face in utter fear.

"You all suck." She mumbles.

9 months later.

"YOU'RE ALL GOING TO BURN IN HELL!"

"Yeah you mentioned that already." I say, dabbing Chris' sweat blotted forehead.

"Where's Will?" She cried.

"Tobias went to go and find him. You know he left to Erudite last night for business. Besides I'm surprised you let him leave despite being almost 2 weeks overdue." I shake my head as she gives me the middle finger. "Save that for the actual pushing." I say, closing her finger back into a fist.

"Ow, ow it's happening again!" She whimpers, squeezing my hand and trying to curl up. She sobbed as I dabbed her forehead again and stroked back her dark hair.

"It's almost over." I tell her out of encouragement.

"How did you do this for 17 hours?" She asked between raged breaths.

"I don't know, I just did. Be glad you're only 5 hours in and are already 9 centimeters." I say looking at the clock to double check.

"I just want her out!" She demanded, I'm sure it was an ill-fated attempt to make her daughter come out faster.

"Save your energy for when you actually have to push." I suggest, she crumbles against my arm in defeat.

"I hate all of this." She begins to cry, I wipe away her tears.

"Just think about her, think about your little girl." I say in whisper. "Think about how she will hold you hand and look at you like you're the greatest person ever." I began to think about my own kids who were probably waking up to find Shauna and Zeke instead of Tobias and I. Will left yesterday for an overnight business meeting and at 3 in the morning I received the frantic call from Chris telling me her water has broken and she was in labor. I forced Tobias to call Shauna and Zeke, and then to go and find Will while I went to help Chris walk to the infirmary. It was a grueling task considering how she lived nearly 10 minutes away and was bigger than me. I tried to support her but her contractions were coming every minute, she was in very fast labor according to .

"Chris, you are 10 centimeters and must start pushing now." informed Chris. She became frantic.

"No, not without Will." She cried. "I need him!" She pleaded; I could only look to her sympathetically.

"Dear you must start now, the baby can't wait." looked at Chris for a long time before she turned her gaze to me.

"Please stay with me!" She begged, I squeezed her hand a little tighter.

"I wouldn't leave you even if someone had a gun to my head." I promised, she gave a weak smile.

"Okay Chris, start pushing as soon as you feel the next contraction." And so Chris did. She clenched her teeth, bared forward and began to push with all her might.

"Good job Chris, keep going." I encourage, wiping her forehead with the towel. She released the pressure but was soon back up and pushing, determination taking over everything else.

As she moaned loudly I watched as Will walked in. He ran to Chris' other side and took her hand.

"I'm right here sweetheart. I've got you." He says close to Chris' ear. She released and looked to Will.

"Oh thank God." She whispered, Will kissing her before Dr. Quin broke them up.

"One more Chris." He said and so with a finale push and squeeze of my hand Chris released the little screaming baby.

She was very dirty, very large, but very sweet.

~.~.~

"Piper Willow Blagrove. She weighs 8 pounds." Chris announces, rocking her small daughter. Piper has dark skin and hair like Chris. Her eyes seem to match Will's, green, like celery that glinted with mischief. I instantly knew that my daughter and Chris' daughter were going to run Dauntless to ruins with their look of danger and excitement. It was only a matter of time before the both of them would be playing and fighting each other.

"She's pretty." Damien decided while Will crouched in front of him and Phoenix, holding Piper. "I like her." He added.

"I'm glad to hear that." Chris said to him.

"That's your new girlfriend." Uriah suggested to Damien, this only made Damien happier.

"Bye-bye Piper." He waved as Will stood up and went back to Chris.

"Here Tris, why don't you hold her?" Chris suggest, handing the baby to me.

I fell in love instantly and knew that I was not done having children. There was still room in our family for one more.

~.~.~

4 YEARS LATER…

My stomach churned at the sight of my bowl of beef stew. Phoenix and Damien were racing to see who could get their bowl down first while Tobias told them over and over how they were going to throw up.

Piper was making a fuss over the stew as Chris encouraged her to take just one more bite despite her hatred of the liquid and chunks of meat.

"I don't want any!" Piper demanded loudly, Will finally taking over Chris' place and telling her how it is not polite to push your food away.

"Come on Pipes, look at Phoe and Damien. They love their stew." Will encouraged, Piper crossing her arms over her chest and shaking her brown piggy tails.

"Trust me this is far from fun. They are going to lose their loads later because they're eating too fast." Tobias watches our children in dismay.

Phoenix placed her tilted bowl down again once it's contents was emptied into her stuffed mouth.

"Wipe your mouth sweetheart." I say in a tight tone, handing her a white napkin so she can wipe up her brown covered chin.

"I WIN!" She cries once she swallows her soup and wipes off her mouth, still leaving a smudge by her lip. Tobias licks his thumb and cleans it off for her, her face contorting in disapproval of her daddy helping her.

"That's my girl." Shauna says from behind, ruffling Phoenix's red curls and taking an empty seat beside her. Zeke follows her and sits by Shauna's side.

"Did you see me win Shauna?" Phoenix asked in delight of her win and getting to see her best girl friend Shauna.

"I saw that mouth full of soup if that's what you mean." Shauna laughs and helps clean the extra soup on the side of her lip.

"Where's Izabel?" Damien asks, his grey eyes trying to find she small baby from Zeke and Shauna.

"Marlene and Uriah wanted to babysit." Zeke informs Damien, the bags under his and Shauna's eyes telling everyone else that they were exhausted and needed and all day nap away from their 3-month-old daughter.

"Can I hold Izabel later?" He asks in a small whisper.

"Sure buddy." Zeke gives Damien a smile before starting on his own bowl.

"Daddy I can't finish it. My tummy is starting to hurt." Damien gives a light push to his bowl so then it moves closer to Tobias.

"What did I tell you?" Tobias shakes his head while taking away the kids bowls.

"Sorry-daddy." Phoenix says, a hiccup cutting between her words.

"Yeah, sorry daddy." Damien agrees. Phoenix continued to hiccup, chugging water between the sounds.

"You've been awfully quiet." Chris addressed me.

"Sorry, just a little sick, that's all." I say as my stomach did a summersault. "Tobias, do you mind if I head back to the apartment?" I whisper to him, his hand falling on my thigh.

"You sure you're okay, we can all go back if you like." He suggests, trying to catch my wandering eyes.

"No, that's okay. Damien wants to hold Izabel and I'm sure Mar and Uriah will be here soon. I'll see you three later." Without another word from Tobias I kiss him and rise, heading for the door, my mind anticipating to see the test results of the stick I left on the sink edge.

~.~.~

"So what did you do after I left?" I ask Tobias as I undo my ponytail and fix my hair in front of the mirror. He was sitting against the headboard of our bed in his usual shirtless, black pajama pant sleepwear. I approached our bed and slipped off my clothes from today, replacing them with one of his too big shirts and a pair of shorts.

"The kids begged for cake, I had to tell them no because they ate way to quickly and I didn't want them vomiting all night. Mar and Uriah came by with Izabel so Damein got to hold her. Piper and Phoenix did a little crazy dance on one of the free tables after watching two people fight on it. It was truly eventful." I laugh at the thought of my daughter holding hands with her best friend as they twirled on a tabletop.

"Well that's our daughter, silly and determined." I crawl onto the bed, sitting cross-legged by his side as he cups my face with a single hand and runs it down my neck and over my back.

"What did you do?" He asked me, his hand resting on the small of my back.

"Well I was thinking," I say with a weak smile.

"Uh oh, about what?" He asked with a raise of his eyebrow.

"About maybe having another baby…" My words trail at the end and Tobias' eyebrow fell back down.

"A…a…baby?" He spluttered in utter shock.

"Yeah a baby, you know the ones that require 3 in the morning feedings and diaper changes every 3 hours. The tiny ones." I supply.

"Oh those ones." Tobias laughs, his hand falling from my back as he limply stared at the wall ahead.

"Yeah, those ones." I say, searching for any signs of resentment in his eyes.

"Did you want one?" He asked after a minute of thinking.

I shrug my shoulders, "Maybe." I say with a small smile.

"Tris why are you asking me this now? I mean not to sound mean or anything it's just you haven't had the slightest interest in having more children over these 4 years."

"I used a test before leaving for dinner. I thought that the condom broke last time because I was having some of the symptoms from when I was pregnant with the twins." I admit, his brain obviously reeling to take in all of this information.

"What did it say?" He asked.

"What did what say?" I ask, still scared from telling him about possibly holding his child.

"The test, Tris." He says to me with a small cock of his head.

"Oh, right the test! It was negative." I say, my smile dropping exponentially. Tobias seemed to sadden at the news, looking away from my eyes and looking to the blankets. "Are you sad?" I ask him, he shakes his head lightly, it was far from convincing.

"Tris, when you took the test what result were you expecting?" He asked me after a moment of awkward silence.

"I don't know, maybe I was a little excited. I began to imagine Damien and Phoenix having their own little brother or sister you know?"

"We jump together and I don't know whether you're ready or not but I feel like it's a better time than any."

"Why so?" I ask, my eyebrows now furrowing.

"Because the kids go to school next September. It's already January so give it 9 months you will be having a baby before they leave. It makes all the sense. No need to worry about being pregnant and dealing with Damien and Phoenix going to school each day." Tobias cocks a grin and I laugh.

"You've really thought this over." I say with a raise of my eyebrows.

"I guess I have. I mean I do wonder it would be like to have another little baby in the house."

"Well you are about to be a very busy man." I say, going on my knees and crawling over his body towards his face. "We jump together." I say, waiting for him to reply.

"Even if one of us doesn't have a parachute." He whispers, closing the space between us.

My hands hold his face as he pulls my hips closer. I'm soon straddling him as he deepens our kiss. When my sitting satisfies him his hands rise and slide under my shirt. I shiver as his warm hands roam my stomach. He pulls my top off after a minute and then reaches for my shorts. I oblige and rise, losing my shorts and panties. He laughs at my confidence, pulling me back into bed and posing himself on top of me.

"I love you." I whisper, breaking our kiss momentarily. "I'm so glad you're mine." I add on.

"I'm so glad you chose me." He whispers, kissing my nose. I laugh and stroke his side. I can feel all of the little bumps from his scars caused by his own father's hand.

"Every last bit of you." I reassure him, kissing him once again and allowing him to take us away from everything else for a few splendrous minutes.

* * *

**Thank you all so much for the suggestions and sympathy over my braces. The pain has since subsided and I am slowly going back to my old diet. I've been trying all of the foods you guys suggested.**

**Not much to tell all of you. Sorry for the delayed post, I've been studying like CRAZY! My first exam is next Thursday (English) and then I have science the day after. Finally I have math the Monday after both, ending the painful world of notes and binders and pens!**

**When are you free from muggle school?**

**Comment if you like this story!**

**-Valentina **


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